Skip to comments.(Vanity) A New National Symbol for the Political Parties
Posted on 06/02/2010 9:15:46 PM PDT by grey_whiskers
I happened to be reading an outdoors magazine while waiting for a haircut this evening. Maybe it was the idea of "taking a haircut" which got my mind moving in this vein, but I started thinking maybe we need new symbols for the two major political parties.
Just to review, the current symbols are:
For the GOP, the Elephant. Which I guess makes sense if and only if you think of Elephants as Grand and Old. And if you think the phrase "the elephant never forgets" describes them accurately.
For the Dems, the Donkey. OK, the Jackass. I am tempted to exclaim that this is half right, especially the trailing half. And I suppose the stubbornness fits well. But I am really looking for something better.
I was tempted to rely for P.J. O'Rourke for guidance. "When are the worlds political parties going to get appropriate symbols: snake, louse, jackal, outhouse, trash can, clown face, dildo, dollar bill with wings on it?"
But I think it would be better to stick with the animal kingdom.
For the Republicans, then, the first and most obvious answer is the Rhinoceros. Do I really need to explain? But then that would be implying that the official symbol of the GOP is only a sham. Instead, I think we need another large, grey, heavy, smelly animal. An old one.
How about a dinosaur?
But not just any dinosaur. I was thinking of the genus Diplocaudus from Tom Weller's classic 1985 Hugo Award winner, Science Made Stupid:
It is appropriate, since, just as the elephant never forgets, the Diplocaudus never remembers.
Now as for the Democrats -- obviously we want a four-legged critter as well. What about (in honor of Barack Hussein Obama, mmm, mmm, mmm) we choose a pink unicorn? Naah, no good. What happens when he leaves office?
So with all of these thoughts going through my head, I opened the page of one of the outdoor living magazines in the barber shop, and kind of ran into it by accident. The perfect animal for the Dems.
It is a carnivore, and feeds on smaller animals; it hides from the light; it works underground; and it has a similar relative in England.
I know, I know. What on EARTH am I thinking?
The scientific name clinched it for me, and I think it will for you as well.
The real, honest-to-God scientific name for the badger is...
I want a new Political Party with only one litmus test, “FREEDOM”
I am under the belief that you can boil everything down to that. I am sick of the mealy mouths in the GOP that would sell their grandma for a vote.
(Vanity) A New National Symbol for the Political Parties
Bird cage liner for a Wednesday midnight.
The symbol for democrats should be the hippopotamus.
Because they’re fat, ugly and dangerous.
That was amusing. I didn’t smile or anything, because it’s only 6 a.m., but deep inside I’m amused.
I suggest Mortimer Snerd for the RATS and John Wayne for the GOP.
Thanks for the ping.