Dave Barry - Marlins make to World Series, but still don't get respect

The Miami Herald ^ | 10/17/2003 | Dave Barry

[Luis Gonzalez]

OK, Marlins fans: We have to go through this one more time.

I'm talking about getting disrespected by the fans of the other team, because we're not deserving enough.

We went through it with the Giants fans, who felt their team deserved to win because they had Barry Bonds, plus they were supposed to win the World Series LAST year.

Then we went through it -- big time -- with the Cubs fans, who felt they REALLY deserved to win because (a) the Cubs have not won anything since the glaciers retreated from North America; (b) the Cubs have a better ballpark than we do, with all the history and the ivy and the blah blah blah; (c) the Cubs fans are SO knowledgeable about baseball, as opposed to us lame-o Marlins fans, a bunch of bandwagon jumpers who know so little about baseball that we would probably do something REALLY stupid, like interfere with a catchable foul ball hit by an opposing player.

Listen, Cubs fans: We feel sorry for you, really. But stop whining already. And leave that poor fan alone, unless you truly believe that, by touching the ball, he caused the Marlins to score eight runs in that game, and nine in the next. Your team lost because THE MARLINS PLAYED BETTER, OK? It's NOT because of some ''curse.'' The supernatural had nothing to do with it! Unless you count a Miami woman I know named Tina, who's from Nicaragua, and who revealed, after the Marlins beat the Cubs, that during the crucial eighth inning of Game 6 she performed a type of witchcraft called brujeria. But that did not violate any National League rule.

Anyway, my point, Marlins fans, is that neither the Giants fans nor the Cubs fans respected us. And now we're going to go through it again, only this time it will be much worse, because it will be New Yorkers.

I don't mean to insult all New Yorkers. I myself grew up in the New York City area, and I know that there are many New Yorkers who are thoughtful, gracious and classy. But there are also Yankees fans. They can best be described by an eight-letter word, beginning with the letter ''a,'' which I cannot write in a family newspaper.

Oh, what the heck, I'm going to write it anyway: The word is ''arrogant.'' Yankees fans believe their team should win the World Series every single year, because the Yankees have a Great Winning Tradition, defined as ''a really rich owner.'' That would be George Steinwhacker, who overcame the handicap of being born wealthy to become even more wealthy, and who buys all the best players from other teams. Sometimes he buys them during actual games, dropping cash on opposing players from his helicopter until they change into Yankees uniforms right on the field.

So the Yankees fans will be very confident, and the Yankees will be heavily favored. The entire rest of the nation will be rooting against us, because the Marlins had the insensitivity to beat the beloved Cubs, instead of, I don't know, deliberately striking out in key situations.

In short, Marlins fans: Nobody wants us to win, and nobody respects us. Fox Sports has announced that it will not even be broadcasting the Marlins' halves of the innings.

''When the Marlins are batting,'' stated a Fox executive, ``we will broadcast our new sitcom Wanda at Large, which we feel will have a greater appeal to our viewers.''

OK, fine. Let the rest of the world disrespect the Marlins, and their fans. It didn't matter when we played the Giants; it didn't matter when we played the Cubs; and it won't matter when we play the Steinwhackers. Because we don't need tradition, and we don't need history. What we have is better: A, plucky, spunky team that never gives up; a feisty 106-year-old manager who doesn't give a crap what anybody thinks; and a bunch of fans who maybe jumped on the bandwagon a little late, but who plan to make up for it by partying EXTRA long when we win the World Series.

Plus, we have Tina.

[Luis Gonzalez]

GO MARLINS!!!!

[jocon307]

BTW, Luis, thanks for sending me that cute goat picture the other day! In all my sadness it still amused me, and nothing else did about baseball in the past few days.

Now, if I was a really, really, really nice person I might root for the Marlins now. Hubby is, I think. His hatred for the Yankees has become deep-rooted. I, however, will revert to home-town spirits and root for the stinking pin-stripers. Even tho' Pudgie I-rod used to play for the rangers!

But, congrats and good luck to your team, and I really did get a kick out of the goat!

[Luis Gonzalez]

The great Dave Barry, plus an unabashedly self-promoting bump for my humble tribute to his wit and style, complete with a guest appearance by "One Trick Pony and the Litter Brigade".

Where's Tina when I need her?

GO MARLINS!!

[Luis Gonzalez]

Well then, try this, if the comedy don't get you, the clowns in the audience will.

[driftless]

The large flow of traffic to area drug stores in New York right after the Red Sox and Cub debacles was tv executives buying razor blades in large quantities. Nobody but nobody outside of Miami and Manhattan wants to see a Marlins-Yankees series. I only have a slight interest anyway, but for what it's worth Luis, as a long-time Yankee-hater, I hope your team wins.

[TheExploited]

The Yankees may be in for a shock. The Marlins hitters are alot like the Yankee hitters of 1996 - 2000 who just wore out the pitchers. Also, the Marlins have the speed to manufacture runs. Their speed will put pressure on the Yankee's defense which is not that stong. If the Marlins get decent starting pitching, this will not be close.

[The Brush]

The Cubbies broke my heart in '69.
I hurt my neck once in '69 too but that was a couple of years ago, it's feeling better now thanks~

[Amelia]

Here are my World Series rules (not being anywhere close to the world's biggest baseball fan):

1. Root for the Southern team.

2. If 2 Southern teams or no Southern teams, pull for the National League.

3. Under NO circumstances, pull for the Yankees.

GO FISH!! :-)

[Mo1]

But stop whining already. And leave that poor fan alone, unless you truly believe that, by touching the ball, he caused the Marlins to score eight runs in that game, and nine in the next.

Sounds like good advice

Whatever happen to the days when baseball was fun to watch

[Luis Gonzalez]

"Nobody but nobody outside of Miami and Manhattan wants to see a Marlins-Yankees series."

That's OK, there's no one of note outside of New York and Miami anyway.

[freebilly]

I'm talking about getting disrespected by the fans of the other team, because we're not deserving enough.

Here are Marlins attendance figures for the past five years--

Marlins Attendance figures 1999-2003

YEAR- -Game Avg- -Season Total- -League Avg-

1999........ 16,906........ 1,369,421........ 2,380,436

2000........ 15,134........ 1,173,389........ 2,480,194

2001........ 15,765........ 1,261,226........ 2,481,346

2002........ 10,038........... 813,111........ 2,309,294

2003........ 16,147........ 1,275,686........ 2,273,813

If the Marlin fans don't care enough to support their own team, why should anyone else care?

[freebilly]

Actually, on second thought, the Marlin fans do support the team. It's the New Yorkers living in Florida, who are still rooting for the Yankees and Mets, who aren't showing up to the games....

[curmudgeonII]

Face it. The only reason the Markins are in the World Series is because they beat the Chicago Cubs.
Doesn't everybody?

[RedBloodedAmerican]

Listen, Cubs fans: We feel sorry for you, really. But stop whining already. And leave that poor fan alone, unless you truly believe that, by touching the ball, he caused the Marlins to score eight runs in that game, and nine in the next. Your team lost because THE MARLINS PLAYED BETTER, OK?

It's called denial. We saw it in 2000. Maybe it comes around every 3 years :o)

[Cicero]

"Sometimes he buys them during actual games, dropping cash on opposing players from his helicopter until they change into Yankees uniforms right on the field."

There's some truth in that. That's all right. As a life-long Yankee fan I'll take anything we can get, even if we have to buy it. After all, we bought Babe Ruth from Boston. Nobody thought that was a bad move. It's the New York way.

[JohnnyZ]

Dude, of course *I'm* rooting for the Fish.

To kill every single one of the Yankees.

Figuratively, of course.

[Batrachian]

"Yankees fans believe their team should win the World Series every single year, because the Yankees have a Great Winning Tradition, defined as ''a really rich owner.''"

Let me inject a little perspective into this statement. All baseball owners are rich, to some extent. Some are far richer than George Steinbrenner. Take for example the owner of the Atlanta Braves. What's his name? Oh yeah, Ted Turner. Ditto the owners of the Orioles, Mets, Dodgers, and probably others. It takes more than money. In fact, money is part of the reason those teams don't win, because their owners are primarily interested in making money, and those teams make it in droves. George Steinbrenner, and the past owners of the Yankees, are primarily interested in winning. You might think that's the same thing in baseball but it isn't. The Orioles stink year after year but they're a very profitable team, mostly because of their wonderful park. There's no reason for them to do the hard work of putting together a successful team, and they couldn't do it even if they wanted to because they don't have men like Brian Cashman, Gene Michael, Joe Torre and a lot of other guys no one will ever hear about to do it with.

Winning is first, making money is second. Do one and the other will follow. All other teams have it backwards.

Let's Go Yankees!

[Polybius]

Here are my World Series rules (not being anywhere close to the world's biggest baseball fan):

1. Root for the Southern team.

Even for Ted Turner's Atlanta Braves?

[Polybius]

The Marlins against the Yankees.

That makes it the first Miami vs. Miami Beach World Series.

[Victoria Delsoul]

I don't mean to insult all New Yorkers. I myself grew up in the New York City area, and I know that there are many New Yorkers who are thoughtful, gracious and classy. But there are also Yankees fans. They can best be described by an eight-letter word, beginning with the letter ''a,'' which I cannot write in a family newspaper.

Oh, what the heck, I'm going to write it anyway: The word is ''arrogant.'' Yankees fans believe their team should win the World Series every single year, because the Yankees have a Great Winning Tradition, defined as ''a really rich owner.''

LOL, who needs Tina when I can tell ya right now, Yankees are gonna win.

Go Yankees!!!