Letter to Dear Abby

[Gopher Broke]

Dear Abby:

My husband is a liar and a cheat. He has cheated on me from the very beginning, and when I confront him, he denies everything.

What's worse, everyone knows he cheats on me. It is so humiliating. Also, he's been out of work for the past four years and has not even looked for a new job since. All he does is smoke cigars, and cruise around with his pals, while I have to work to pay the bills.

Since our daughter went away to college, he does not even pretend to like me...and hints that I am a lesbian.

What should I do??

Clueless

Dear Clueless:

Grow up and dump him. For Pete's sake, you don't need him anymore...You're a United States Senator from New York, act like one.

[mylife]

Wh00p!
Hillaryious~!

[ovrtaxt]

ouch! bump

[CrazyIvan]

Dear abby, dear abby ...
My feet are too long
My hair’s falling out and my rights are all wrong
My friends they all tell me that I’ve no friends at all
Won’t you write me a letter, won’t you give me a call
Signed bewildered

Bewildered, bewildered...

Chorus:
You have no complaint
You are what your are and you ain’t what you ain’t
So listen up buster, and listen up good
Stop wishing for bad luck and knocking on wood

Dear abby, dear abby...
My fountain pen leaks
My wife hollers at me and my kids are all freaks
Every side I get up on is the wrong side of bed
If it weren’t so expensive I’d wish I were dead
Signed unhappy

Unhappy, unhappy...

Repeat chorus

Dear abby, dear abby...
You won’t believe this
But my stomach makes noises whenever I kiss
My girlfriend tells me it’s all in my head
But my stomach tells me to write you instead
Signed noise-maker

Noise-maker, noise-maker

Repeat chorus

Dear abby, dear abby...
Well I never thought
That me and my girlfriend would ever get caught
We were sitting in the back seat just shooting the breeze
With her hair up in curlers and her pants to her knees
Signed just married

Just married, just married...

Repeat chorus

John Prine

[randita]

while I have to work to pay the bills.

Bubba is making enough money to pay ALL the bills. With his pension, speaking fees that start at $100,000 and money from books, he's pretty fluffy. Hillary has her "lowly" Senator's salary, plus all her whirlwind investment income, but I doubt it comes close to rivalling Bubba's these days.

[Gay State Conservative]

Hey,honey....if you don't want this guy,my sister would sure like to meet him.He sounds like a real keeper!

[Past Your Eyes]

http://gopherbroke.tripod.com/

Unfortunately, this group has broke up.

[sgtbono2002]

You forget Hillary got 8 million dollars for her book which was technically against Senate rules but she slipped in a couple of days before the rules were in effect.

Hillary stays for one reason: Her run for President. She needs the Slickmeister to get there. From the way he looks he may not make it.Hope springs eternal.

[HEY4QDEMS]

From the way he looks he may not make it.Hope springs eternal.

Aside from a terrorist, I wouldn't wish death on anyone.

[fnord]

love old John Prine .... I think of that song every time someone reposts this joke

[Michael.SF.]

That was perhaps one of the most polite admonishments I have seen in regards to someone posting an 'oldie but a goodie'.

[elfman2]

I didn't see it coming! LOL!

[CrazyIvan]

Me too. Hadn't listened to him for awhile and a friend lent me one of his CDs the other day and I had to get my own copy. The guy sure knows how to get to you emotionally. Every time I miss a visit to my grandmother in the nursing home I think of "Hello In There". I don't miss very often.