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High school's dances grind to a halt
Concord Monitor ^ | September 21. 2006 | MELANIE ASMAR

Posted on 09/21/2006 3:09:52 PM PDT by NCjim

A furor over what Concord High School administrators call an "overtly sexual" style of dancing at school dances has split the school community: There are those who defend the students'right to dance however they want and those who believe the moves are just plain inappropriate.

Principal Gene Connolly is with the latter group. He said the school will cancel all remaining dances, including the upcoming homecoming dance, unless students step forward to help halt the "grinding."

"This style of dancing is wrong," Connolly told parents at a Parent-Teacher-Student Organization meeting Tuesday night. "If you were to see it, you would be equally offended."

Asked by parents to describe the dance, Connolly offered this: The girl leans forward and the boy puts his pelvis against her backside. Then, he thrusts.

"It's feigning a sex act," Connolly said.

But some students and parents don't see it that way. They say that like the jitterbug and disco before it, grinding is just a sign of the times.

"We were raised to dance like that," senior Kayla Bisson said.

According to Connolly, students began grinding at Concord High dances about three years ago. Administrators tried to intervene, pointing out that the school handbook says all dance styles "must comply with standards of modesty and safety" and mandates that dance partners face each other.

When that didn't work, administrators met with the student senate last year and drafted a "dance memo of understanding."In the memo, the students acknowledged that current dance trends "can appear sexual." They also said the administration "has made it clear that they do not want to police our dancing styles."

The sides agreed students should use their best judgment, but administrators should have the final say.

"We all know where the line is and when we are crossing it," the memo says. "There will be no specific 'rules' to follow regarding how we dance. However, should someone's dancing make others feel uncomfortable, they will be kindly asked to stop. . . . Should they refuse to do so, they will be asked to leave."

But the grinding continued.

The situation came to a head Saturday at the first dance of the year, which was attended by 350 students. By the time the first slow song was played, a half-dozen boys had been warned repeatedly to quit grinding, staff and students said. When they persisted, the boys were asked to leave. About 150 students followed.

"It was eerie," said Ben Nicholson, the senior class president. "There was a controlled calm to it all."

The students headed to the parking lot, Nicholson said, but changed their minds after being told they couldn't congregate on school grounds. Someone suggested they go to White Park instead, but the police were already there. So the students proceeded to Rollins Park, where Nicholson said they played music and danced.

At Rollins Park, Nicholson persuaded the students to turn down the music because of the city's nighttime noise ordinance. Then, he gave an impromptu speech from atop a truck bed, telling his peers it was understandable that they were upset.

Senior Caitlind Cooper was one of the students who gathered at the park. Addressing the PTSO and Connolly on Tuesday night, she objected to the way the situation was handled.

"We go to a dance to have fun, and you telling us how to dance is not fun," Cooper said.

Nicholson, however, said yesterday that he sees the situation from both sides. He understands the administration is trying to enforce the rules, but he said the students feel oppressed.

"Students are losing respect for the system that's supposed to protect them," Nicholson said. "They feel that what's been done has been done out of spite."

He chalked the root of the problem up to a generational misunderstanding.

"It's not so much about dancing as it is about a culture clash,"Nicholson said.

Some parents agreed. Tom and Cathy Cooper said they feel teenagers today are acting no different than they themselves did decades ago. Tom Cooper said he feels an obligation to remember what his parents said about the way he danced in high school.

"If you remember Elvis Presley - there's a grinder," Cooper said.

Other parents, including Pete Duval, said they don't object to the dance style, because it doesn't lead to further touching. Once the music stops, they said, so does the grinding.

"The look is extremely sexual, but the intent is not," Duval said.

Connolly, who joked with parents that he felt like the anti-dancing preacher from the movie Footloose, said he didn't think so, especially when senior boys dance with freshman girls. Both parents and Concord Superintendent Chris Rath said they support his position.

"Eventually, things may change and this may be considered mild," said parent Cheryl Hunter. "But right now, it's inappropriate."

No one seems to know what's next. The homecoming dance, which raises money for the senior prom, is scheduled for Oct. 7, and upperclassmen are upset that it may not happen. So far, no group of students has stepped forward to present a solution to the administrators, who have given them until tomorrow.

And Nicholson, who said he never dreamed he'd have to act as a mediator when he was elected senior class president, said he's doing the best he can.

"I'm not sure of the solution,"Nicholson said. "It involves mutual understanding, and understanding doesn't happen in one meeting."


TOPICS: News/Current Events
KEYWORDS: backthatthangup; backthatthingup; bet; booty; bootycall; dirtydancing; diversity; diversityisstrength; gangsta; grind; hiphop; homeschool; mtv; vh1
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To: Blue Jays


81 posted on 09/21/2006 5:37:41 PM PDT by Blue Jays (Rock Hard, Ride Free)
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To: <1/1,000,000th%

God remember Elvis and his pelvis? Give me a break.


82 posted on 09/21/2006 5:40:27 PM PDT by greccogirl
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To: SALChamps03

no clue, I don't watch it. I just no I turned it to fuse the other night and saw some old guy stripping and it freaked me the hell out.


83 posted on 09/21/2006 5:43:50 PM PDT by Ainast
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To: NCjim

Why not just call it like it is. Change the name from the Homecoming Dance to the Homecoming Groupgrope. Or just go all the way (so to speak) and call it the Homecoming... Oh nevermind.


84 posted on 09/21/2006 5:46:11 PM PDT by Savage Beast ( 9/11 was never repeated thanks to President George W. Bush.)
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To: NCjim

Perhaps some here should read an actual description of the dance before telling us how it's just like the waltz...

QUOTE FROM DANCE SITE:

Well next to sex its one of the most fun things to do. Its safe, simple, and it may even lead to actually having sex(safe sex of course)! Gotta love it. Im not even sure why people seem to have so much trouble with learning how to grind. For girls all they do is shake their ass left to right in small circular motions, making sure its sticks up or out. All the guys have to do is ride them. If the girl doesn't know what she is doing than the guy takes the lead. Guys you put your hands around their hips, thrust your pelvic area on their ass. Now you do exactly the same thing move your pelvic area in the same small circular motions left to right. Don't forget to bend your knees from left to right accordingly to retain balance otherwise you look stiff. If the circular motion is to hard you can start with just left to right and work your way to small circular motions. So basically you guide their ass with your pelvis. Once you become a pro like me you can start improvising moving your whole pelvic area in conjunction with your chest in a sort of a snake movement, but lets not get ahead of ourselves. If all fails just look at the pictures I uploaded above, see how much fun they are having while you stand by the wall like a wall flower. NOW GET YOUR ASS IN THE DANCE FLOOR!

UNQUOTE

That ain't the waltz and I don't want my kids doin' it at the High School


85 posted on 09/21/2006 5:47:20 PM PDT by aMorePerfectUnion (outside a good dog, a book is your best friend. inside a dog it's too dark to read)
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To: Flash Bazbeaux
No, it's the fictional town in Thornton Wilder's Our Town.

-PJ

86 posted on 09/21/2006 5:48:13 PM PDT by Political Junkie Too (It's still not safe to vote Democrat.)
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To: Xenalyte

I'm with you. Based on wikipedia's description over here

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Freak_dancing

---The partners face the same direction so that one partner's (typically the girl's) buttocks are rubbing the other partner's (the boy's) groin. This is the most common technique in the reggaeton scene, otherwise known as perreo. In some parts of the Northeastern United States it is commonly called culiando, which basically translates to grinding. A variation of this technique has the girl supporting her weight with one or two hands on the floor (buttocks in the air) while the boy, holding her by the waist, grinds to the rhythm on the buttocks in a manner that simulates the doggy style sexual position.----


- the excuses these kids (and parents!) are making about it being "non-sexual" are a joke!


87 posted on 09/21/2006 5:55:48 PM PDT by cgk (I don't see myself as a conservative. I see myself as a religious, right-wing, wacko extremist.)
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To: Dinsdale
What would a kid have to do to shock a GWAR fan?

Well...they could tell 'em about Dinsdale...
88 posted on 09/21/2006 5:58:14 PM PDT by visualops (artlife.us crikey!)
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To: dfwgator
Ha! Check out the gigantic Sony Walkman.

We've come a long way.

89 posted on 09/21/2006 7:08:47 PM PDT by Jotmo (I Had a Bad Experience With the CIA and Now I'm Gonna Show You My Feminine Side - Swirling Eddies)
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To: TypeZoNegative
GWAR?

Little help please.

90 posted on 09/21/2006 7:09:54 PM PDT by Jotmo (I Had a Bad Experience With the CIA and Now I'm Gonna Show You My Feminine Side - Swirling Eddies)
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To: NCjim

"Other parents, including Pete Duval, said they don't object to the dance style, because it doesn't lead to further touching. Once the music stops, they said, so does the grinding.

"The look is extremely sexual, but the intent is not," Duval said."

What do you think, father of the year award for this guy?


91 posted on 09/21/2006 7:10:15 PM PDT by lastchance (Hug your babies.)
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To: NCjim

If I or my husband had ever seen some guy grinding our daughter that fellow's hope for a future family would have been forcibly removed from his body. And if said daughter had not slapped the guy silly her trip to the convent would have been swift and sure.


92 posted on 09/21/2006 7:12:15 PM PDT by lastchance (Hug your babies.)
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To: NCjim
"The look is extremely sexual, but the intent is not"

Ha ha. Try as you may to toss nature out with a pitchfork....

93 posted on 09/21/2006 7:13:39 PM PDT by JasonC
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To: NCjim

The Waltz was quite scandalous some years ago.


94 posted on 09/21/2006 7:16:35 PM PDT by Doctor Stochastic (Vegetabilisch = chaotisch ist der Charakter der Modernen. - Friedrich Schlegel)
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To: NCjim
I remember in 1971,at my junior high school dance the principal kicked the band out for having long hair! (Yes they were all males.)
95 posted on 09/21/2006 7:17:54 PM PDT by 4yearlurker (12th district Freeper.)
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To: NCjim; <1/1,000,000th%; wagglebee; EdReform; Born Conservative; Victoria Delsoul; stm; Bahbah; ...
Asked by parents to describe the dance, Connolly offered this: The girl leans forward and the boy puts his pelvis against her backside. Then, he thrusts.

"It's feigning a sex act," Connolly said.

But some students and parents don't see it that way. They say that like the jitterbug and disco before it, grinding is just a sign of the times.

"We were raised to dance like that," senior Kayla Bisson said.




...that's no way to rear a child. Millstones, meet necks. See post 85...and NAMBLA would be proud--and might in fact be (see post 37). BRAVO for the principled principal!
96 posted on 09/21/2006 7:45:29 PM PDT by The Spirit Of Allegiance (Public Employees: Honor Your Oaths! Defend the Constitution from Enemies--Foreign and Domestic!)
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To: Doctor Stochastic

Probably it could be said that all dancing has a sexuality aspect to it. I've taken many dance lessons including waltz and tango. Both these and others can be danced two ways, with a slight distance between partners and full-body-contact.

Full-contact ballroom dancing is indeed quite intimate and often symbolic but it is most definitely not grossly, overtly sexual. There is a difference. As Potter Stewart said, perhaps I can't define obscenity but I know it when I see it.


97 posted on 09/21/2006 7:55:12 PM PDT by The Spirit Of Allegiance (Public Employees: Honor Your Oaths! Defend the Constitution from Enemies--Foreign and Domestic!)
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To: All

I WROTE:
Probably it could be said that all dancing has a sexuality aspect to it

I AMEND AS FOLLOWS:
...Except that which is 'dancing unto the LORD' such as King David did.


98 posted on 09/21/2006 8:01:19 PM PDT by The Spirit Of Allegiance (Public Employees: Honor Your Oaths! Defend the Constitution from Enemies--Foreign and Domestic!)
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To: lastchance
Other parents, including Pete Duval, said they don't object to the dance style, because it doesn't lead to further touching.

I wonder if he'd let me dance with his wife like that?

99 posted on 09/22/2006 3:05:22 AM PDT by Right Wing Assault ("..this administration is planning a 'Right Wing Assault' on values and ideals.." - John Kerry)
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To: NCjim
"Grindin' coffee" - been bad since my HS banned it in 1958.

How did we not become wanton crminals?

100 posted on 09/22/2006 3:18:31 AM PDT by metesky ("Brethren, leave us go amongst them." Rev. Capt. Samuel Johnston Clayton - Ward Bond- The Searchers)
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