Posted on 10/18/2006 12:22:59 PM PDT by Da_Shrimp
Well now, in just less than 3 months time, I'm going to become a dad for the first time, at the age of 44.
I wondered if there are any other blokes around here who became fathers at such a relatively advanced age? What was it like, do you regret not having children younger, did you cope with the broken nights and nappy changing and is there any advice you could give?
I live in England, so things like health care etc might be different to the way they are over your side of the Pond, but I'd be fascinated to hear any anecdotes or experiences you older dads might have
At the moment I feel really happy about the idea of becoming a dad, but also bloody scared at the same time!
Hmm, the co-sleeper looks interesting, I'll definitely discuss that with Agnieszka (my wife). We already plan to have a cot in our room close to the bed anyway, but this looks purpose-made for the job. Thanks for the info!
Again, a huge thank-you to everyone who's posted advice and messaged me directly. I'm really looking forward to putting it into practice come early January!
Mike K.
My parents were in their mid 30s, as I am fast approaching now, and that was considered "old" in the '70s (perhaps so today). My father was previously married and had a child 12 years older than myself. My older half-sister didn't have children until she was 32 (my age). I am single, unfortunately (and not by choice as I was previously engaged). Hard to find suitable mates to have children with these days... :-(
My dad was born in 1898 and died in 1968. My mom was born in 1905 and died in 1982.
I still miss 'em.
what a FUN thread!
and even more fun ahead for you, Da_Shrimp
We had ours later in life too, #1 at 40, then #2 and #3 at not-yet 42 for ole dad. If anything, I think they've kept us younger than our chronological years.
You may have a baby who sleeps through the night after a week or two, who knows? We had that good fortune, and I think it was because the babies were in a very tranquil environment. It became less tranquil as they grew (chaotic is more like it).
Don't let it bother you if people ask if s/he is your grandson/daughter. In fact, don't let anything bother you, you are being sent the most wonderful blessing you will ever know.
And, do keep in mind as others have said, that it passes all too quickly.
Best to you and the missus ... do let us know when your baby is born.
Congratulations! My husband was 43 when our 8th baby was born earlier this year. He's handing it just fine, and I'm sure you'll do great with yours too!
Bottom line. Do not have any regrets.
Down side, That would usually wake me, and I would toddle off for a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and a cocoa. But sleep disruption was minimal, though I did pack on a few pounds (stone)
My father was 41 years old before he even got married. After he and mom tried and tried for kids (she was 35 when they married) they decided on adoption. At the time I was born my dad was 47 (48 when they adopted me). I have a youger brother and sister.
The first time I think I really noticed that my parents were older than other's who had kids my age was when I was in high school. Never really thought about it before that. Dad always kept himself in good shape (working out of doors, cross-country skiing, etc.,) so he was pretty much able to keep up with us kids as we were growing.
The real interesting perspective is now at this stage of my life (early 40's). I am dealing with things with my elderly parents that my wifes parents are dealing with with her grandmother (my dad just turned 89 this last Saturday). The only thing I regret (that's not really the word, more like wish was different) is that with my parents being so old, my kids (their grandchildren) will not have as much time to spend with them as they will with their other grandparents (assuming normal life spans, health, etc.).
Best advice (from the "kids" perspective): stay as healthy as you can, as active as you can, keep a young heart. You're going to love being a dad. Best thing in the world.
Welcome to the club! I was 44 when we had our youngest son. Feel confident that your newborn will keep you young. Hopefully you'll be able to retire when your kid graduates college...plenty of time to take your kid to the pub!
I had my first daughter when I was 38 or so, and my second at 39. I think it's wonderful! I love my girls, especially when they see me and run to give me a hug and a kiss, squeeling in excitement.
I can't compare what it's like having a child at an "older" age vs. at a "younger" age. It's wonderful, regardless.
Yeah, the sleep interruption thing gets tiring, but the joys outweigh the pains.
Congrats!
Congratulations. Being a father is a blessing that will be with you the rest of your life. Life as you know it will change, but mostly for the better and the rewards will pay off forever.
Good Luck with your expanding family.
44 is not too old to have a child. My dad was 50 when I was born and he was a great father. He died when I was in my late twenties, but he did give excellent advice which I remember to to this day. He was polictically very conservative and I remain so today. He was also a WWI vet.
Mine was 18 or 19 when I was born. He was pushing 50 when my youngest brother was born. The older my Dad gets the more I like him:')
Wow 8 kids, good bless they are adorable.
Great homepage...greater family!!
Bump
Thanks! We don't have the energy we had 15 years ago, but have have much more patience :-).
I am 50 and we have a 10 month old daughter. We also have a 13 year old son and 10 year old daughter. All the same mom. I would not trade the experience for anything. Of course, all three of our kids started sleeping thru the night at 6 weeks so I've got that going for me. I can't imagine having a child, like my brother, who wakes up multiple times a night screaming (I say for attention!) I might have stopped earlier if that was the case. No regrets!
Folks tell me the baby has made me seem younger, but I'm just havin fun like I've always done.
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