Posted on 08/03/2007 3:09:37 AM PDT by 2ndDivisionVet
The I-35 westbound bridge over the Mississippi River in Minneapolis collapsed, sending rush hour traffic tumbling into the river below. Rescue crews rapidly descended on the location only to be blocked by the media and onlookers stumbling over one another to get the best pictures of the carnage to upload to YouTube.
Back in Washington, DC the rush to find someone to blame has already begun. Taking to the floor of the Senate, Senator Dick Durbin said, "You would most certainly believe this must have been done by Nazis, Soviets in their gulags or some mad regime Pol Pot or others that had no concern for human beings." Senator Kerry blamed Republican politics saying, "What you see here is a harvest of four years of complete avoidance of real problem-solving and real governance in favor of spin and ideology."
House Speaker Nancy Pelosi released a statement saying, "While George Bush was passing tax cuts for the rich and pursuing an unwinnable war in Iraq, he left our infrastructure crumbling."
Vice President Cheney released a statement from an undisclosed location rebutting the claims of some Democrats saying, "This is a stark reminder that we live in a post-9/11 world where Al Qaeda can cause a tragedy like this. We should all be reinforced that we are fighting a global war on terror."
The linking of the bridge collapse to the war on terror only increased the rage on popular left-wing hate blogs like the DailyKos where one commenter said, "At least when Mussolini ruled with fascism in Italy, the trains ran on time. With HitlerBushCo and his fascist regime, we can't even keep bridges standing."
It wasn't just the partisans who were quick to lay blame on the Bush administration. Recently fired professor Ward Churchill cited America's imperialist policies and called those who were injured or killed in the collapse "little Eichmanns". National Organization of Women President Kim Gandy noted the lack of media coverage on the women victims and said that "this tragedy is a stark reminder that the Bush Administration has again and again failed women." Planned Parenthood is offering free abortions and contraception for those affected by the collapse.
Louis Farrakhan suggested that the bridge was blown up to kill the minority population. Reverend Al Sharpton and Jesse Jackson have already announced plans to travel to the area highlighting that the slow response to the tragedy was due to racism and the overwhelming majority of victims were minorities. Comedian Chris Rock was quick to rebut this claim saying, "There are no black people in Minnesota. The only black people in Minnesota are Prince and Kirby Puckett."
Fred Phelps, a pseudo-Christian minister, laid the blame elsewhere, suggesting that the bridge collapse was divine punishment for homosexuals and support for gay marriage in the United States. This has sparked outrage from the various GLBT support groups.
Plans for a relief bill are underway headed by Republican Senator Ted Stevens to provide aid for the area and to rebuild the bridge. Porkbusters was quick to point out that the relief bill was already loaded with earmarks including money for a "bridge to nowhere" in Alaska. When this was pointed out, Senator Stevens said in protest, "If the Senate decides to discriminate against our state and take money only from our state, I will resign from this body." Senator Trent Lott said he is tired of hearing from Porkbusters.
Senator Ted Kennedy was unavailable for comment due to intense irony. Ann Coulter has already penned her next four columns making Chappaquiddick jokes.
-------------------------------------------------
Note to readers: Yes, this is biting satire. Yes, there are people who have lost loved ones and any decent person should have them in their prayers/thoughts (and I do). My motivation in writing this is the fact that about 8am EDT tomorrow, the politicians and pundits are going to start the blood-letting.
You know it's going to happen, it always does. There is a certain segment of the population that descends on human tragedy to chuck corpses at their political opponents. And it's not just the left, or the right. Pundits will try to tie this to "their issue". People will make it a partisan issue. And you know some asshole has a video that he made instead of trying to help someone that's going to go up on YouTube. Ann Coulter will probably not be able to write a column without bringing up Chappaquiddick for a month.
It's sub-human, it's sub-primate, and I'm ashamed that these people drive our news cycle. That's why I wrote this, to point out the complete absurdity of it all, in the hopes that if at least a few don't change, that most of you simply turn off the TV because all the televised media (and most of the print) is a waste of time anyway.
I pray for the people who went through this and also their family's..I pray they will be able to cope with the tragedy's and move on with their lives..which it will be so hard to do..
Later when I watched a safety expert saying that the river was too rapid for him to send in his divers, I came to the conclusion that what brought the structure down was water erosion and "Cavitation".
I will take bets that during any previous inspections of this bridge nobody thought to send down divers to inspect the bases of these verticle legs.
Absurd it is. Sickeningly, it’s all too real, though...
The author wishes it were "biting" satire, but it only rises to the level of "lame"
This showed me that the collapse wasn’t due to fatigue cracks in the super-structure but failure in the piles on which the roadway was laid.
I wonder if the damn above the bridge was built before or after the bridge was built?..... There’s a picture of the bridge at the link below and further down the page is another picture showing the bridge intact and the damn above it [#167}. From that picture you can easily seen the strong current flow indications.
http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1874950/posts?page=101#101
This event served as a means for the rabble-rousers to hit the “play” button on their canned speeches and patented rants.
The fact is, this catastrophe was waiting to happen probably for some time now. The structure was simply obeying immutable laws of gravity and the shear point of metal fatigue. Under-engineered when first constructed (to meet a cost-containment requirement, no doubt), the bridge design proved inadequate because of something that has been made part of all newer Interstate bridge designs - redundancy in the primary support. The design of this bridge was rather like a toothpick creation, in which the failure of one toothpick at a critical juncture led to the dominos-like collapse of the entire structure.
Study of the points of failure on this bridge should be made the focus of all courses in bridge design at civil engineering schools everywhere.
The Romans built bridges that have stood for over 2,000 years, which is a testament to something.
it was global warming caused it....local affiliate news babe being interviewed by the national parent news network (i was jumping around...dont remember which), said something about how the temperatures had been “... near 100 for at least a week now” when asked by an equally vapid network type if there was any possible explanations for the collapse.
Yes darling that concrete and steel just goes to hell at 100°F. What a moron.
this is from yahoo news canada andf I gues a rueters story.
Rep. James Oberstar, the Minnesota Democrat who chairs the House Transportation and Infrastructure Committee, blamed President George W. Bush’s administration for shortchanging road and bridge repair in a highway funding bill two years ago.
Bush, he said, “failed to support a robust investment in surface transportation,” adding the president insisted on only $2 billion a year for bridge reconstruction when lawmakers were pushing for $3 billion a year.
Additional reporting by Jon Hurdle in Philadelphia, Carey Gillam in Kansas City and Rick Cowan in Washington)
Simply inexcusable for the bureaucrats to be so wrapped up in new building they forget the basic fundamental maintenance of the existing infrastructure.
Thank God our Republican Govt Pawlenty got re-elected. If the DFL ran everything in this state, they would all ready be using this disaster to be demanding massive tax increases so they could waste even MORE money of stupid “transit” projects” while neglecting the infrastructure people actually NEED!
It scares me when I tell if your joking.
Bush’s fault? For a bridge that had been found to be substandard since the early 1990s? A bridge that they refused year after year after year to fix so they could keep wasting money on “Mass Transit”?
Where was this slime bag Democrat, who has been in the Congress for over 30 years, when this bridge was build so poorly?
That right, IN CONGRESS!
Maybe the State of Minnesota should not of spent over $1 billion during the late 1990s on “Light Rail” projects and instead fixed the bridges people actually USE.
Swiftean satire. Angry more than funny (which is ok). Thanks for posting.
My biggest concern will be all the politicians that will start lining up, thumping their chests with indignation, and imposing all sorts of rules and regulations on bridges, and infrastructure.
You can see the hearings, and committees that are coming, and people being hauled in front of them. These committee members will act with righteous indignation, and tear into the accused. It will become pathetic.
Yes... if negligence was involved it should be taken care of, but it will again turn into a circus.
It reminds me of the scene in Gettysburg, when John Bufford, makes a similar speech before the battle of Gettysburg happens. He sees the slaughter of Union soldiers taking place if Bufford's calvary doesn't stop the advance of Lee's Army.
I watched 2 Mustangs collide last week at the EAA Airventure. One pilot was killed. These guys are the cream of the crop, but sometimes there are things that take place beyond our control. After the accident everybody wanted to play armchair quarterback and ask how could this happen?
Sometimes things just do. A reminder to me that God is still in control.
Very well said!
http://www.globalsecurity.org/security/library/news/2007/05/sec-070508-afps01.htm
First words out of her mouth? Bush’s Fault.
Remember it well.
.
.
.
It’s an automatic MSM and DRat response and talking point to just about any tragic event.
A “dam” holds back water. Not trying to be a spelling policeman, but the use in your post just looks funny.
Just DAM!
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.