Skip to comments.Hillary Insures Her Piano Legs for $10 Million
Posted on 10/19/2007 7:35:31 AM PDT by laotzu
(LONDON) A decade-long rumor was confirmed today when it was announced that Hillary Clinton has insured her piano legs for $10 million with Lloyds of London. Until yesterday the public had only known of Hillary's piano legs through anecdotal evidence because no known pictures of them existed. For example, in March 2006 Chris Matthews of MSNBC's Hardball called Hillary, "Dukakis in a dress," and noted that she has better calves than former Democratic Presidential nominee Michael Dukakis.
Washington pundits speculate that Clinton has chosen this time to insure her legs because she expects Rudy Giuliani to emerge as her probable Republican rival in the Presidential race. Pictures of Rudy in a dress, taken when he appeared briefly as "the Don in a thong" on Broadway, regularly circulate on the internet and show what a Hillary spokesperson calls, "a very shapely set of gams."
Howard Dean, Chairman of the Democratic Party, expects Hillary to unveil her piano legs after she secures the Democratic nomination. He speculates that it will generate more buzz than when Hillary revealed her cleavage on the Senate floor this year in front of CSPAN cameras.
According to urbandictionary.com, a reference site widely used by urban hipsters, piano legs are "disproportionately thick calves and/or ankles on a woman with otherwise normal body weight." It also cites the Democratic presidential frontrunner in its example of proper usage of the phrase: "No wonder Hillary Clinton always wears pant suits. She's got a humongous set of piano legs."
Although Lloyds used their press release to heavily promote Hanes® new Hiphugger-High support panty hose, a product targeting the aging baby boom generation, they seemed delighted to underwrite a set of legs as famous as Hillary's. A spokesperson for the Clinton campaign would neither confirm nor deny Hillary's possible endorsement of the new Hanes product.
Clinton joins company with Betty Grable and Marlene Dietrich, two notables with million dollar legs underwritten by Lloyds. However, all three fall far short of Mariah Carey who insured her legs for $1 billion last year before embarking on an advertising campaign for Gillette.
I just called them “FAT”
If she had her ass insured, she’d have to have multiple coverages.
No it wouldn't. It would be comprehensive since she's all ass.
Hillary actually has a “Coke Bottle” figure..............3 Liter.................
In that middle picture she looks like Ethyl Mertz.............
I thought cankles were un-insurable?
Not until she filed an Environmental Impact Study.
Didn’t I read somewhere that she wears corrective pantyhose? If not “corrective,” then I’m sure it was prescription pantyhose.
How about a satire tag on the headline?
I was not familiar with theat website, and with the loony headlines of today, who knows?
Between her eyes, socialism lies.
Between her thighs ________ lies.
The blanks are to keep me from getting banned.
Sorry if someone has nightmares over the visual.
That's what we in the insurance business call "excess liability" coverage.
There must be an insurable interest before anything can be insured.
I don't know of anyone that is interested.
See keywords below article.
Seriously, how much to you think Hillary weighs? 150lbs, 160lbs?
Available in the Excess & Surplus market.
It would take multiple trips for her to haul ass.
I think the cankle clause would make any leg policy worthless.
If you figure her premium on a per pound basis,then it’s not unreasonable.That’s a lot of tonnage to cover.
I’m willing to bet we, the taxpayers, pay these premiums.
Somebody gotta dig and see where the money for this policy really comes from.
I am not a hillere fan.
I cannot stand the woman.
She is a fake and a phony.
She is a liar plain and simple.
She in my opinion is an evil person with a personal agenda that is NOT in the interest of the United States.
She is NOT QUALIFIED to be President of these United States
THOSE are the reasons I do not like her
THOSE are the reasons I would not vote for her
Having said that...I think the attacks on her physical stature do nothing but bring us down to the level of the opposition. There are lots of people both men and women who have weight problems. Everyone is built differently and has nothing to do with whether or not he/she can lead. hilllereee clintin cannot lead. She is NOT Presidential Fodder. Never has been...never will be.
Let’s stop with the attacks on her weight.
Agreed. There is plenty to oppose about Hillary. She has a normal appearance to me.
If I started knocking all the male candidates for their “shortcomings,” I could have a field day.
She’s a one person crowd.
Field day for sure. Even those we like, right? So, maybe the remarks will stop and instead focus on her shortcomings which we all know she has.