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Gay revision of the Bible to go on sale
http://theendtimesarehere.com ^ | 04/21/2011 | n/a

Posted on 04/21/2011 10:32:21 AM PDT by massmike

Move over Adam and Eve. Here comes Adam and Steve, as well as Samantha and Delilah.

A newly revised gay-friendly Bible is set to go on sale in the next few weeks. Reaction to the announcement has been met with venom from conservative Christian groups. Pink Cross Publishing, the same company that published a gay-friendly version of the Koran, stated that they were adding the finishing touches to the newly revised Bible.

Mary and Joseph will be replaced by Mary and Josephine, a lesbian couple unable to have children the conventional way, hence the virgin birth of Jesus. All of Jesus’ disciples will be gay except for Judas.

In the new Bible, all of the disciples will pair off after the Last Supper with the exception of Judas. Satan will also be straight. The new gay-friendly Bible has yet to be named.

(Excerpt) Read more at theendtimesarehere.com ...


TOPICS: News/Current Events; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: bible; filth; homosexualagenda; moralabsolutes; napl; religiousleft; satire
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1 posted on 04/21/2011 10:32:23 AM PDT by massmike
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To: massmike

My favorite is the version of the Koran where Mohammad is a talking dog, possessed by a demon, lying to people so that they end up in hell for eternity. Funny, funny stuff.


2 posted on 04/21/2011 10:34:28 AM PDT by ClearCase_guy
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To: massmike
All of Jesus’ disciples will be gay except for Judas.

Well I always kind of suspected Matthew anyway.

3 posted on 04/21/2011 10:35:26 AM PDT by humblegunner (Blogger Overlord)
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To: massmike

Sickening on so many levels.


4 posted on 04/21/2011 10:36:46 AM PDT by ilovesarah2012
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To: massmike

Oh, dear Lord. Teh Stupid, it burns.


5 posted on 04/21/2011 10:37:29 AM PDT by RichInOC (Palin 2012: The Perfect Storm.)
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To: massmike

They will go to the hot place for this.


6 posted on 04/21/2011 10:37:49 AM PDT by boomop1
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To: massmike
Revelations 22:12-21:

12 “Look, I am coming soon! My reward is with me, and I will give to each person according to what they have done. 13 I am the Alpha and the Omega, the First and the Last, the Beginning and the End.

14 “Blessed are those who wash their robes, that they may have the right to the tree of life and may go through the gates into the city. 15 Outside are the dogs, those who practice magic arts, the sexually immoral, the murderers, the idolaters and everyone who loves and practices falsehood.

16 “I, Jesus, have sent my angel to give you[a] this testimony for the churches. I am the Root and the Offspring of David, and the bright Morning Star.”

17 The Spirit and the bride say, “Come!” And let the one who hears say, “Come!” Let the one who is thirsty come; and let the one who wishes take the free gift of the water of life.

18 I warn everyone who hears the words of the prophecy of this scroll: If anyone adds anything to them, God will add to that person the plagues described in this scroll. 19 And if anyone takes words away from this scroll of prophecy, God will take away from that person any share in the tree of life and in the Holy City, which are described in this scroll.

20 He who testifies to these things says, “Yes, I am coming soon.”

Amen. Come, Lord Jesus.

21 The grace of the Lord Jesus be with God’s people. Amen.

7 posted on 04/21/2011 10:37:49 AM PDT by DCBryan1 (FORGET the lawyers...first kill the "journalists". (Die Ritter der Kokosnuss))
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To: massmike
That is so gay.
8 posted on 04/21/2011 10:38:09 AM PDT by E. Pluribus Unum (When and why did Steve Dunham change his name to Barack Hussein Obama? When he converted to Islam?)
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To: massmike
The new gay-friendly Bible has yet to be named.

I'm sure that there are plenty of suggestions that are probably quite appropriate.
9 posted on 04/21/2011 10:38:39 AM PDT by Sopater (...where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty. - 2 COR 3:17b)
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To: ClearCase_guy
My favorite is the version of the Koran where Mohammad is a talking dog, possessed by a demon

In the sequel, he gets lost and falls down a well. It is literary genius.


10 posted on 04/21/2011 10:40:01 AM PDT by humblegunner (Blogger Overlord)
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To: Sopater

Pink Prophets, Ltd.


11 posted on 04/21/2011 10:41:15 AM PDT by Cicero
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To: massmike

This is not a Bible, this is pure blasphemy


12 posted on 04/21/2011 10:41:28 AM PDT by GeronL (The Right to Life came before the Right to Happiness)
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To: massmike

GROINAL CHRISTIANS!!!!... What a concept...


13 posted on 04/21/2011 10:41:45 AM PDT by hosepipe (This propaganda has been edited to include some fully orbed hyperbole...)
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To: massmike

Reaction to the announcement has been met with venom from conservative Christian groups.


That’s not the only one angry about it.

Why publish this? Anyone that actually believes in God would never change the Bible, and anyone that doesn’t believe in God wouldn’t take the time to read any Bible, no matter how revised.


14 posted on 04/21/2011 10:41:57 AM PDT by Brookhaven (Moderates = non-thinkers)
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To: massmike
I'd be real interested in seeing their take on Sodom and Gomorrah.

Lamh Foistenach Abu!
15 posted on 04/21/2011 10:42:38 AM PDT by ConorMacNessa (HM/2 USN, 3/5 Marines, RVN '69 - St. Michael the Archangel, defend us in battle!)
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To: massmike

Publish and be damned...


16 posted on 04/21/2011 10:43:52 AM PDT by Paisan
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To: massmike
I sure hope they aren't calling it The Bible. I can only imagine the number of PO'ed people who think they gave their grandchild a real Bible only to get this impostor.
17 posted on 04/21/2011 10:45:05 AM PDT by econjack (Some people are as dumb as soup.)
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To: massmike

Witnessing the descent into madness........can be hilarious....until the crash at the bottom. Splat! Then it gets really icky.


18 posted on 04/21/2011 10:46:50 AM PDT by MestaMachine (Note: I do NOT capitalize anything I don't respect...like obama and/or islam...but I repeat myself.)
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To: econjack

I just hope they don’t come up with a pop-up book version.....


19 posted on 04/21/2011 10:48:28 AM PDT by massmike (DADT repeal: the Boy Scouts now have tougher membership requirements than the Army!)
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To: massmike
Do they think they can fool God? Why don't they just worship Gaia.
20 posted on 04/21/2011 10:49:43 AM PDT by faucetman (Just the facts ma'am, just the facts)
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To: massmike

Commandment #11: Thou shalt be fabulouth


21 posted on 04/21/2011 10:49:53 AM PDT by rokkitapps
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To: massmike
Whoa. Very bad ju-ju.
22 posted on 04/21/2011 10:50:56 AM PDT by greatplains
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To: massmike
Do they think they can fool God? Why don't they just worship Gaia.
23 posted on 04/21/2011 10:50:56 AM PDT by faucetman (Just the facts ma'am, just the facts)
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To: rokkitapps; massmike
Commandment #11: Thou shalt be fabulouth

ROFLMAO!

Commandment #12: Flexth those muthles!

24 posted on 04/21/2011 10:51:50 AM PDT by DCBryan1 (FORGET the lawyers...first kill the "journalists". (Die Ritter der Kokosnuss))
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To: massmike
I hope they come out with a new adultery-friendly revision.
I've always hated that whole not being able to cheat on your spouse thing.
25 posted on 04/21/2011 10:52:45 AM PDT by LivingNet
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To: faucetman
Do they think they can fool God? Why don't they just worship Gaia.

Don't worry faucetman, they already do. This is just to add injury to Christians and blasphemy the Holy Bible.

26 posted on 04/21/2011 10:52:54 AM PDT by DCBryan1 (FORGET the lawyers...first kill the "journalists". (Die Ritter der Kokosnuss))
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To: ilovesarah2012; scripter
Sickening on so many levels.

it's so stupid... it's not a Bible... it's a made-up story... it cannot be considered scripture... God's Word means nothing to these people... those writing it, publishing it, purchasing it, reading it... on the other hand--somewhere deep inside of them, there is something that wants His approval... they are going about it all wrong... dangerously wrong...

27 posted on 04/21/2011 10:53:08 AM PDT by latina4dubya ( self-proclaimed tequila snob)
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To: massmike

Damn those to Hell who would revise God’s Holy Word for such an agenda. I need say no more. God will deal with them accordingly.


28 posted on 04/21/2011 10:54:59 AM PDT by BuckeyeTexan (There are those that break and bend. I'm the other kind. *4192*)
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To: massmike

I’ll have to get a copy so that I can put it on my bookshelf right next to the Jefferson Bible, the Joseph Smith Bible, and the New World Translation of the Bible. The only novelty here is that it has a little higher “ick” factor. Otherwise, new and “improved” Bibles are as American as snake oil ... sadly.


29 posted on 04/21/2011 11:00:49 AM PDT by Belteshazzar (We are not justified by our works but by faith - De Jacob et vita beata 2 +Ambrose of Milan)
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To: massmike

Does anyone really give a smelly Obama about a gay bible?


30 posted on 04/21/2011 11:04:50 AM PDT by Da Coyote
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To: massmike

That gay-friendly koran will go over well.

31 posted on 04/21/2011 11:06:32 AM PDT by Snickering Hound
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To: Sopater
The new gay-friendly Bible has yet to be named.

How about the queer-ran.

32 posted on 04/21/2011 11:07:47 AM PDT by twhitak
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To: massmike

The “begats” are going to be boring, just a list of folks who didn’t do any begatting. Maybe they’ll be adopting in the homo version.

Freegards


33 posted on 04/21/2011 11:07:57 AM PDT by Ransomed
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To: DCBryan1
you may add; Deu 12:32 What thing soever I command you, observe to do it: thou shalt not add thereto, nor diminish from it.
34 posted on 04/21/2011 11:08:58 AM PDT by the_daug
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To: twhitak

The Queen James Version.

Freegards


35 posted on 04/21/2011 11:09:17 AM PDT by Ransomed
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To: massmike

So I guess Sodom and Gomorrah were mistakes? Riiighttttt...

This is so sick and damnable.


36 posted on 04/21/2011 11:14:00 AM PDT by WKUHilltopper (Fix bayonets!)
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To: massmike

BFL


37 posted on 04/21/2011 11:15:55 AM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: massmike

For the time is coming when people will not endure sound teaching, but having itching ears they will accumulate for themselves teachers to suit their own passions... 2 Tim 4:3 (ESV)


38 posted on 04/21/2011 11:20:21 AM PDT by scripter ("You don't have a soul. You are a soul. You have a body." - C.S. Lewis)
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To: massmike

“Go and sin some more.”


39 posted on 04/21/2011 11:24:15 AM PDT by Antoninus (Fight the homosexual agenda. Support marriage -- www.nationformarriage.org)
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To: massmike
Pink Cross Publishing?

It's BS? I suspect so.

40 posted on 04/21/2011 11:29:29 AM PDT by the_daug
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To: massmike

...not worried- God’s got this:

“For I testify unto every man that heareth the words of the prophecy of this book, If any man shall add unto these things, God shall add unto him the plagues that are written in this book:” Revelation XII, 18.


41 posted on 04/21/2011 11:31:24 AM PDT by 13Sisters76 ("It is amazing how many people mistake a certain hip snideness for sophistication. " Thos. Sowell)
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42 posted on 04/21/2011 11:33:41 AM PDT by TheOldLady
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To: massmike

A revision to largely ficticious book. So what?


43 posted on 04/21/2011 11:35:27 AM PDT by csuzieque
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To: ConorMacNessa

“I’d be real interested in seeing their take on Sodom and Gomorrah.”

Instead of fire and brimstone, God smites them with gumdrops and lollipops?


44 posted on 04/21/2011 11:37:58 AM PDT by Boogieman
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To: Boogieman; ConorMacNessa

Oh, I’ve already heard the “gay version” of Lott’s wife, at least.

“See, she was turned into a PILLAR, as in a “pillar of the community”, because she cared so much about the people in those cities.”

I kid you not, this is the “gay” version.


45 posted on 04/21/2011 11:41:10 AM PDT by MrB (The difference between a Humanist and a Satanist - the latter knows whom he's working for)
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To: rokkitapps

I wonder about Genesis... be unfruitful and don’t multiply?


46 posted on 04/21/2011 11:41:27 AM PDT by Boogieman
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To: csuzieque

“A revision to largely ficticious book. So what?”

Troll much?


47 posted on 04/21/2011 11:45:23 AM PDT by Boogieman
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To: Boogieman
I was going to reply to him, but I'm fresh out of "troll chow"


48 posted on 04/21/2011 11:49:00 AM PDT by MrB (The difference between a Humanist and a Satanist - the latter knows whom he's working for)
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To: GeronL
It's obviously not a real "bible," but a parody.

All the worse.

We truly are living in the "days of Noah."

49 posted on 04/21/2011 11:55:15 AM PDT by fwdude (The world is sleeping in the dark that the Church just can't fight, 'cause it's asleep in the light.)
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To: fwdude

More blasphemy

http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/2708482/posts

pretty much the same crowd


50 posted on 04/21/2011 11:56:45 AM PDT by GeronL (The Right to Life came before the Right to Happiness)
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