Skip to comments.Please Help
Posted on 11/29/2013 8:10:23 PM PST by patriciamary
Sorry, this is not the right thread,but I rarely post.But,I really need help.I always find fellow freepers not only intelligence but very caring.My husband had his third stroke three weeks ago at age 5.He worked all his life for every we have,he was self employed. All our savings have gone to hospital bills & living expenses. I was a stay at home mom,& for the past few years have been his caregiver,but I must find a job in order not to lose my home for my children. I need advice on what I should do.Is there a career that pays fairly & does not require long term training.Please put me on the right path.I would appreicate any advice.Thank you.
I was a successful career counselor for many years. Where do you live and what kind of jobs do you wish to apply to?
Had a friend in a similar situation She got trained to do medical billing. Works at home on her own schedule. You might look into it or another stay at home computer job.
I live in pittsburgh, I would like to do something in health care.
God bless you patriciamary.
The only thing I can think of that may help make ends meet (I would do this if I did not have a career or the time to train) is to run a small in-home daycare. People (at least in Canada) are always looking for good homes and honest people to leave their kids with while they’re working.
I realize it may not be ideal, but if you keep it under a certain number of children (so that the government doesn’t bother you), you can make a bit of money....usually cash. At least that’s how it is up here - hope it’s helpful, even if just temporary. Best wishes to you all.
Prayers up for you and your husband. <3
You ask ... “Is there a career that pays fairly & does not require long term training.”
You and everyone else would like to know that one ...
Okay, at what level? Medical assistant, receptionist, optician, etc...
Have you thought about clerical work at a hospital? I had a cousin do that and he had zero training.
You say your husband has been self employed. Is his business still viable? If so, can you run it or perhaps sell it if it has any value?
The best two-year degree is in long-term care/nursing home administration. Pay is good from the get-go and can hit six figures within 5-7 years with hard work.
You are exactly the person I thought of to help. Just could not for the life of me remember who it was. Remembered the background but not the handle
Glad you saw the post!
401ks and IRAs are protected in bankruptcies.
The primary residence is also usually protected.
Find a good attorney pronto because that is where you are heading and you need to protect yourself and family.
Two of more Amen to your prayers.
2D could be a valuable resource.
BTW, where do you live?
About 6 years back this happened to a relative of mine who was in his mid 80s. He was lucky to have just got a reverse mortgage months before the stroke (and the housing crash) and he and his wife ran through the entire amount in a year after the stroke.
To take another one now would cost more in closing costs than the loan would provide itself, due to insurance costs.
He is married too and its never good news now. Every day is “How do I pay this bill?”
No credit anymore naturally.
Every career pays fairly, given the free market.
You get out of it what you put into it.
That's as "fairly" as it gets.
I realize that ,just hoping for a little direction. I don’t want to inconvenience anyone.
Sorry to hear your problems.
Even as self employed, your husband must have been paying into Social Security and at the very least he should be able to get disability from SS, which is not much, but should help.
Also — I noticed you said you want to do something in healthcare — do search the want ads — there are jobs such as medical billing, and so on, where if you have or willing to acquire some basic computer skills you can do OK and in some places they are willing to train you. Also this maybe something you can even do from home at least some of it.
I wish you the best.
Some health clinics have entry level positions and you can train on the job for more technical skills and better pay. Start going to the websites for medical groups in your area and see if they have job postings listed. Also check with nursing homes in your area to see if they need workers.
Nothin’ wrong with asking. Not at all. This board is awesome and has many great resources and prayer warriors.
You could look into being a caregiver.
You’ll have to decide if working privately for a family is good for you or fir a firm.
You’ll get hired faster privately but, the environment may be tougher than working fir a firm that places caregivers in homes.
1. If healthcare is out of the question, or not in the question (you should be paying attention to Obamacare goings on / medicaid / medicare etc.) be your own boss.
2. One option is to choose something where you can take time out each day to speak directly to your prospects - to say “I am so and so, this is the service I provide, this is my situation...”
3. Make a point to sell that service to everyone around you, every one you know. Maybe it’s lawn-mowing. Maybe it’s windows. You have not offered much detail. But what I am outlining is a “fast, emergency” way to get money coming in.
4. A lot depends on where you live, but it sounds to me as if you may need assistance from family, church, synagogue, government, etc. This is a miserable time for misled, increasingly statist, left-wing limousine liberal America.
5. Remember you have few “freedoms” left now, but be grateful you have the freedom to suffer and learn more, ever more, about the plight of the under-privileged inner city heroes, their ancestry, their feelings, the glory and beauty of their staunch transgenerational illiteracy, criminality, and poverty, without which you might not have been given so many unfair advantages. Remember, in your sorrow, your profound debt to them: sometimes just counting our blessings puts a smile on our face, and that, in turn, will help you work harder for America, and of course, for those less fortunate than yourself, and then, maybe also, for you.
It’s not an inconvenience ... so no problem there. I’m just saying (in general) that with so many people out of work and so many others who have given up looking - that this is certainly the question on everyone’s mind ...
Prayers go with you.
One child started in the insurance business and has done well, the agency trained her, another got trucking and heavy equipment licenses and is doing well. Office work is good. You might want to make sure you look as great as possible on interviews, younger than your years, great hair, great nails etc.
Start applying in the classified. Get some experience interviewing and seeing what is out there. Catholic hospitals tend to hire a broader framework of people.
I was going to chime in with the same question/suggestion.
My wife and I have owned our own small business for about sixteen years now. She's been my business partner from the very start, and knows just about everything that I do about running this thing.
I've often told her that if anything were to ever happen to me, that I want her to step up to the task and keep the business going at all costs. It's been her career since her mid-twenties, and after being a stay-at-home mom for so long, it's really the only professional job she knows.
If she were to try to jump into the job market at this late date, she'd wind up working as a tax preparer or book keeper - neither of which can pay her as well as running her own business.
Prayers up for guidance.
do you know what agency she contracts out of??? i have a friend taking a course right now, thx
A lot of call centers have work at home opportunities and can pay well. I guess it depends on what skills you have already. I know of a company here that pays decently for their employees and offers some telecommuting jobs in the call center. If you factor in transportation costs and time, sometimes telecommuting careers are great.
I wish you the best of luck.
13 year ago my spouse crashed and burned into alcohol and Freepers were a ton of help, offering jobs, advice and prayer. it was a help and I think I still have that thread copied off onto my hard drive.
At 47 with four young children at home I had to go to work full time and homeschooled the children mornings. It was a 12 year long experience. I am beginning to recover from that level of responsibility and now am no longer in anxious screech mode. I will keep you in my prayers.
A unpleasant job with bad hours is nurses aid, It pays pretty good for the minor training required and has the added benefit of learning how to be a caregiver.
This is a job immigrants take here because many Americans wont do it.
Obviously nursing is much better.
Not advice, but rather how I see the lay of the land.
Just like responding to trauma .... Stop the bleeding, stabilize, therapy, recovery.
Start a home childcare business for immediate results. Your husband should be on SSDI and Medicare — that is if you’ve done your taxes right. Start with State Disability, it’s near automatic for 1 year in most states and can carry you over until SSDI kicks in .... just remember to cancel SDI when and if SSDI kicks in. You probably qualify for SSI or Supplemental Income, as well as EBT. You may also qualify as a caregiver and there might be some government program for that.
Use those social and entitlement programs and don’t feel bad about it. I rather my tax dollars go to people who need it instead of things like Egyptian or Palestinian foreign aid.
Churches are great, but generally only good for short term support — though contacts in the church may be able to get you a stabilizing job.
Nurses aid doesnt take much to get into. My daughter started while in High School and as the years went on took more and more classes and advanced. Initially the glasses were really cheap and there seems to be a need still. She was never out of work when she was a nurses aid. She even did home care for elderly through that. Just an idea.
You have to put your talents into providing a service at which you excel that others will pay you for.
Man, I haven’t seen you post in forever.
How you been?
My Mom just loaded up on propane and she thinks it’s gonna be an icy winter this year.
I’m thinking about coming there in May and maybe we get together.
Hope all is well.
Prayers and best wishes to you.
Another thought .... Check all your credit cards, loans, mortgages and club memberships like AAA, AARP et al. Many of them have small cash payouts or even continued payments should the breadwinner become disabled. I doubt you’ve overlooked any of those, but still .... Just in case.
Did you see your mail?
Yeah, I’ve been busy elsewhere and it was difficult to spend much time on the desktop computer. But since I got an iPad, I can sometimes read and reply while sitting at a red light ... LOL ...
And yeah, if you do make it to Tulsa, be sure and let me know - just send some Freeper-mail.
You could check with Visiting Angels or similar services.
You’ve already had experience as a caregiver - maybe something in home health care, assisted living, practical nursing......
Haven’t much to offer except my prayers and a BTT. God bless.
Your children may have to find their own way...
Guessing at their age from your post but unless you had them late in life they are not an equal concern with caring for your husband.
God will not burden you with something he does not give you the strength to handle.
You must lay it before Him; FreeRepublic can help but is not a substitute.
As for going back too work you have several realities to consider. One obviously is the care of your husband while you work. If the kids are old enough they can help watch over him, give him food drink, etc, and have you to contact in case of emergency while at work. I did that for over 5 years and my employer a health care facility wasn't too understanding when I had to up and leave right then and there. LOL. If not then you have the care of the kids as well as him to consider that's why I say look into SSI.
Another factor like what I said above is you will need an employer who is aware of your home situation and flexible to your husbands emergencies and yes you will have them.
You also must also consider your own health both physical and mental ability to handle both caregiver and wage earner roll. It's not easy and it may even bring harm to your own health if you push beyond your limitations.
Apply for all the assistance you can get. Ignore the ones who look down upon it. Look, your husband and yourself to a very real extent as a stay at home mother paid into several programs that was supposed to protect him, you, and your kids, in the event of catastrophic illness.
I am caregiver to my wife of 28 years and have been such for all 28 years. She is a quad. I worked until my body and mind said no more. That was 18 years ago.
One other thing to look into. There are no programs out there for caregivers except for some churches that offer a daycare of sorts to working caregivers. Their ability to help depends on the severity of the person. That is usually a drop off and pick up later arrangement.
Do you have a spare room? If so you could look into giving a room and meals for someone to help you care for him. Hope some of the ideas help you work through this.
Your post reminded me of something I’ve seen on TV.
Very good advise, cva66snipe.