Posted on 01/12/2014 10:48:00 AM PST by Dallas59
So you have never seen a man whose ex makes more money than they do? That the men have been taken to the cleaners, have lost their jobs, have had to liquidate their entire lives or gotten a pay cut but are still required to pay the original amount they cannot afford to pay????
You sound like someone who just hates men. I have female friends who have been SCREWED to the wall by their exes but there are good men who have been destroyed by vindictive women. How fortunate for you that all the women you have come in contact with are delightful angels.
LOLOLOL. What was his reply to that? (BTW, I am in sympathy with men who are forced to pay child support, including arbitrary increases, but for whom the courts don’t make such a great distinction in enforcing their visistation rights. Men get a raw deal in this country when it comes to the divorce, the courts, and their children. I just learned about the Sullivan vs Sullivan case, and thought it was one of the most ridiculous efforts I’ve ever heard of to practically enslave a man in this day and age. I know what my husband went through with the courts vis a vis his ex-wife, and she wasn’t even the one being vindictive or instigating the trouble. He and she had a sensible arrangement-Sixties Mississippi-where he paid her, her bills, whatever his sons needed, a car, the whole works, and of course she was happy with that arrangement. The courts of their own volition tried to get involved so they could get “their” cut, which would have left her receiving less than she was getting in the straightforward “gentleman’s agreement” between the two of them. Somehow they managed to sidestep the courts.)
the support amount in my state is formulaic: if there is a decrease in income, he can go in and say so, they look at his income, refigure and that is that. Administrative too, don’t even have to get a lawyer.
Most of the women I see have been bamboozled by some slick talking unzipped husband pretending to be a Christian and demanding the wives submit to their bullsh8.
I’m sorry, but you took a statement of fact (”assertion” if you prefer) and twisted it to conflate that women initiate most divorces to the man being adulterous or violent.
That’s called a straw man, and it’s crap.
The man isn’t always at fault - neither is the woman. Most of the time, there is dirt on both sides, IMO.
Marital status or lack of it will not prevent a court from ordering child support from a non-custodial parent.
No man’s (or woman’s for that matter!) life, liberty or property are safe as long a court is in session.
You know what people get divorced for all sorts of reasons, and it is the woman who more than likely starts the process.
The problem is that in most cases it is adulatory and it is most often the man who commits it.
Physical abuse is valid grounds for divorce. Around my circle of friends, the most common cause for divorce was the guy's career wasn't going anywhere (or in one case, his business went bankrupt), or he just wasn't exciting any more. How many of your friends were getting beaten up by their husbands? Of those, in how many cases was it the woman who started the hitting?
In the case of adultery, if the wife is in the mood for sex several times a week, and the guy still strays, she has a valid grievance. If she's never in the mood, then she should not appear shocked when the guy finds someone else. I regard chronic, long-term denial of sex to be just as much a violation of marriage vows as adultery.
The article is written terribly but it sounds like he may have gotten the time for contempt and other behaviors in court based on the last parts... I think there is a lot more to the story than what is printed
Cool. Simple solution: learn to operate a backhoe. It's so easy any dummy high-schooler can do it, right? If you're doing the same work, under the same hours and conditions, then, by law, they have to pay you the same $96K. And then you'll be happy.
Of course it does the entire family court and law system is set up to be abused. My divorce should have been amicable but once she got an atty involved it was turned into a multi year tens of thousands of dollars spent on nothing!!! Literally. What should have been nothing more than some awkward and uncomfortable negotiations was turned into a never ending fuctercluck with me paying for both sides so she had no incentive to end it.
Attys and the courts turned a sad situation into one where every petty human emotion was fostered and encouraged to a point where I will never ever spend one more second with the ex than I must and that harms my kids and everything else. It’s a horrible system just designed for abuse by self serving attys and fools on the bench.
Which the teacher can do during summer break, and for which the school system generally pays the tuition, so that by the time she's got four or five years in, she's can have her masters if she takes advantage of tuition reimbursement.
How many years of seniority and experience does it take to get up to $96K?
I've seen the phenomenon where a woman is convinced by her friends that she can do better than the husband she's got (this generally happens with women in their 30's).
So she gets the divorce, and usually then discovers that she CAN'T do better. That the men she finds desirable have little interest in marrying a 30+ single mom (though they're OK with sleeping with her on a short-term basis), and the men who ARE interested in her are not as good as the husband she left.
This leaves her very bitter and angry, and she takes out her anger on her ex-husband. If he were to remarry a younger/cuter woman, it would be a thermonuclear blow to her ego, which is why she is so adamant about ruining his finances.
This does not mean that there are not guys who are just nasty human beings, and who abandon their wives and kids because they never grew up to the point of being able to face adult responsibility. My experience, though, is that it's more often the wife who has primary blame for the marriage failing.
Back then the courts gave a lot more leeway to the custodial parent. If the two were able to work something out they both could agree to, then the court was cool with it and left them alone. Now, the court assumes the custodial parent, if it’s the female half, is too stupid and helpless to effectively argue their case, so the court inserts its own opinion of what is “good.” Wage garnishment is Standard Procedure, too. Those of us who have had to deal with Family Court and its intrusion into the art of the deal already know what it’s like to have health insurance handled the same way.
I’m not surprised at all the people who got their insurance cancelled because “it wasn’t good enough.” Child support is the template.
You do this man-bashing day after day? Hey, there's a CS Lewis quote that covers you, about oppressing people while keeping a clean conscience. That's you to a "T." I would call yours a miserable existence, but it's obvious you enjoy your work.
According to that one, you don’t even have to operate a back-hoe. As a male, you can out-earn any female Doctor just by manually digging a ditch with a pick and shovel. She said that in her very first post on this thread.
you are right—it is a miserable existence.
I represent men too. You would be amazed at the women who “give” their children to others and continue to collect child support.
However, the monster here is also the state enforcement agency that will continue to deduct from parent’s paychecks child support blindly and mercilessly, keep it as the agency’s own slush fund for 30 or more days before paying it out. I have tried to get others in my state interested in taking on this behemoth but nobody has the endurance.
That being said, I have experienced more guys who are the bad actors than women. Guys who have been in prison claiming they had custody of the child the whole time and shouldn’t have to pay child support, guys that used to pound on wives now jealous that she has painstakingly reconstructed her life in a healthy fashion, guys who willkeep the child hidden from their baby momma so they won’t have to pay child support, guys who take the child and drop him at grandma’s while he is out catting around.
If the men were more concentrated on putting their children in front of their selfish selves, making sure the children felt cared for and had everything they needed instead of trying to show the woman that they are the boss, things would be better.
Oppressing men? Don’t make me laugh. That is pathetic.
From her comments on this thread, I'm guessing she's either a bookkeeper or tax preparer, who's jealous of the high-earning construction/manufacturing guys whose paperwork she handles in her nice comfortable office, and doesn't see what they have to do in order to earn that paycheck.
This doesn't mean that there aren't union guys who make high pay for doing very little, thanks to union thugs' extortion, but that's a different story. There's plenty of union women teachers who make plenty of money despite being incompetent idiots (education majors have about the lowest SAT scores of any college major) despite whatever piece of paper from whatever school they may have on their walls.
Don’t twist my words Papa Bear, I said out earn female with their little office jobs. I am a family lawyer.
This may be the source of our different experiences. My circle of friends is mostly middle-to-upper-middle-class, and I don't have anybody among my acquaintances who's been in prison (the most was a friend who got probation for drug possession in his younger days), and don't have any women I know who've been involved in marital violence (at least, that I've known about).
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