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BREAKING!!! HYDROGEN GAS EXPLOSIONS OCCURRING ON MARS!

Posted on 10/31/2001 2:48:00 AM PST by mikewats

[Following is a reprint of the original thread, exactly as it was posted on Free Republic on the evening of October 30, 1938]

BREAKING!!! HYDROGEN GAS EXPLOSIONS OCCURRING ON MARS!

Said to be taking place at “regular intervals” and headed toward the Earth at “high velocity.” Just reported on CBS.

1 posted on 10/30/38 5:06 PM Pacific by Old Dealer

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What in the world is Hitler up to now?

2 posted on 10/30/38 5:08 PM Pacific by Anti Bolshevik

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I’m listening to the Edgar Bergen and Charlie McCarthy program, no news bulletins yet.

How the heck could the explosions be happening regularly, unless it was a man-made source? I don’t like the sound of this.

3 posted on 10/30/38 5:09 PM Pacific by Go Boston Bees

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This CBS fella is interviewing a Princeton professor who says that the odds of there being life on Mars are a thousand to one. But he says he can’t account for the gas bursts being “regular.”

4 posted on 10/30/38 5:11 PM Pacific by Old Dealer

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But he says he can’t account for the gas bursts being “regular.”

(Insert bean-eating or Feen-A-Mint joke here)

5 posted on 10/30/38 5:14 PM Pacific by Spike

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BULLETIN ON CBS - BIG METEOR JUST HIT NJ NEAR TOWN OF GROVERS MILL.

6 posted on 10/30/38 5:14 PM Pacific by Sentimental Gentleman

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ITS NOT A METEOR!!!! NOT A METEOR!!!!!! THERE’S A SPACE MONSTER INSIDE COMING OUT NOW!!!!! LIVE REPORT ON CBS!!

7 posted on 10/30/38 5:15 PM Pacific by Dewey in ‘40

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You guys sure this dope is on the level? I’m listening to a local station in Pittsburgh, and they’re broadcasting one of their usual Sunday night shows, “Opera Without Music.” I twirled the dial around a minute ago, and didn’t hear anything out of the ordinary.

8 posted on 10/30/38 5:17 PM Pacific by Amazon Andy

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I don’t know what the H-*-L-L is going on, but apparently a news correspondent was reporting live from the scene of the meteor that hit NJ. Suddenly this “heat ray” was turned loose and people were burned to death. Then the correspondent was cut off. This is the scariest thing I’ve ever heard in my life.

Still don’t understand why there haven’t been any bulletins about this on Mutual, or the Red or Blue networks.

9 posted on 10/30/38 5:18 PM Pacific by Old Dealer

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Still don’t understand why there haven’t been any bulletins about this on Mutual, or the Red or Blue networks.

It could be that Roosevelt's henchmen were able to suppress the news on the other networks, but for some reason, CBS insisted on reporting it. CBS may get in trouble over this.

10 posted on 10/30/38 5:20 PM Pacific by 8X3R

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ITS ON THE RADIO NOW THESE ARE MARTIANS!!! THIS IS A MARTIAN ATTACK!! NEW JERSEY UNDER MARTIAL LAW!! THEY’VE WIPED OUT THOUSANDS OF OUR SOLDIERS!!! OH GOD IS THIS THE END OF THE WORLD!!!!!

11 posted on 10/30/38 5:23 PM Pacific by Miltown Mel

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Relax folks, I just checked the radio listings in the paper. THIS IS ONLY A PLAY...IT’S NOT REALLY HAPPENING.

12 posted on 10/30/38 5:24 PM Pacific by GOP for Me

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THIS IS ONLY A PLAY...IT’S NOT REALLY HAPPENING.

Move along, folks. Nothing to see here, nothing out the ordinary. Go about your business and pretend that everything’s alright...

13 posted on 10/30/38 5:26 PM Pacific by Liberty Bill

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I don’t know about the rest of you, but I’ve heard enough. I’m grabbing my kerosene-powered laptop and lamming out of here as far as my Hupmobile will carry me. God bless everybody.

14 posted on 10/30/38 5:26 PM Pacific by Old Dealer

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NATIONAL EMERGENCY announced -- the Secretary of the Interior says on the radio we’re at war with Mars. Where's FDR and why isn't he making the speech?????? This is terrible!!!!!!!

15 posted on 10/30/38 5:28 PM Pacific by Cap Spaulding

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Where's FDR and why isn't he making the speech??????

Weird! They introduced the “Secretary of the Interior”, but it sounded just like Roosevelt. I bet it really was him. Sounds like more government monkey-shines to me. We’re not going to win a war with Mars by being cute.

16 posted on 10/30/38 5:30 PM Pacific by Edward G. Rob’emSome

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People, let’s get ahold of ourselves. I think we’re being taken in by a prankster. I live in Princeton, NJ and there’s absolutely nothing out of the ordinary here. Except for some pretty anxious people milling around.

17 posted on 10/30/38 5:31 PM Pacific by Prof Forrester

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RADIO REPORT - “POISONOUS SMOKE” BLANKETING NEWARK, NEW JERSEY. EVACUATE IF YOU CAN

18 posted on 10/30/38 5:31 PM Pacific by Lucky Strike

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NEW YORK BEING WIPED OUT BY MARTIAN INVADERS!!!!!!!!! “THIS MAY BE THE LAST BROADCAST” MARTIAN CYLINDERS LANDING IN BUFFALO, CHICAGO, ST LOUIS. “THIS IS THE END NOW” WE NEED TO PRAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

19 posted on 10/30/38 5:33 PM Pacific by Annie Warbucks

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“THIS MAY BE THE LAST BROADCAST” MARTIAN CYLINDERS LANDING IN BUFFALO, CHICAGO, ST LOUIS. “THIS IS THE END NOW”

Demoralizing, defeatist, pro-Martian slanted reporting. Just another typical day at CBS.

20 posted on 10/30/38 5:34 PM Pacific by Kaltenborn Again

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When we conquer Mars, do we have to share it with the British and French? Or can we keep their portion as payment for the World War debts they’ve welched on?

21 posted on 10/30/38 5:34 PM Pacific by Mr. Long

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Okay, everybody can calm down. They just had an announcement on CBS. I’m typing it as best as I can remember –

“You are listening to a CBS Mercury theater in a dramatization of the War of the Worlds by H.G. Wells starring Orson Wells (sp?)”

I.e., IT’S ONLY A RADIO PLAY. Some joke! Somebody should get his b*tt kicked over this!

22 posted on 10/30/38 5:36 PM Pacific by One Widdle Fishie

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Maybe there aren't any Martians, but does that mean it’s “only a radio play”? Surely CBS knew this would scare people to death. I bet it’s an experiment by Stalin’s commissars in controlling the masses through radio terror. All done with Roosevelt’s knowledge and consent, of course.

23 posted on 10/30/38 5:39 PM Pacific by Coughlinite Warrior

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The New Deal crowd has plenty of good reason to frighten people. It’s no accident this “radio scare” happened just before the congressional elections. Folks have had enough of FDR’s court-packing plan and socialist shenanigans, and the Republicans stand to win big. Unless, of course, the Roosevelt gang starts a panic so they have an excuse to cancel the voting.

24 posted on 10/30/38 5:40 PM Pacific by Martin Barton

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BIG sigh of relief!

25 posted on 10/30/38 5:40 PM Pacific by Rudy VallGal

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I don’t buy the notion that somebody did this on purpose. If people seriously believe a fairy tale about Martians attacking Earth, it’s their own fault, I say.

What REALLY scares me is the chance that Roosevelt might run for a third term in 1940. He’s broken so many precedents and grabbed so much power, I wouldn’t put it past him to defy the two-term tradition. Anybody else think he might do this?

26 posted on 10/30/38 5:43 PM Pacific by Jitterbugged

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FDR wouldn’t dare run for a third term, because he knows that Thomas Dewey or Bob Taft will clean his clock if he does. On the other hand, if a big war breaks out by ‘40, all bets are off.

27 posted on 10/30/38 5:46 PM Pacific by Rhett Butler's Butler

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Only thing I know for sure is that we’ll never hear from this “Orson Welles” guy ever again. I can’t believe anybody will ever let him near a microphone after this.

28 posted on 10/30/38 5:51 PM Pacific by Mr. Cleo


TOPICS: Free Republic; Political Humor/Cartoons
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Just my way of saying Happy Halloween to everybody who posts on Free Republic.
1 posted on 10/31/2001 2:48:00 AM PST by mikewats (mikewats@aol.com)
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To: mikewats
LOL!

Happy Halloween to you !

2 posted on 10/31/2001 2:50:10 AM PST by NoCurrentFreeperByThatName
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To: mikewats
mikewats, this is brilliant!! A big "Thank you!" for this great piece of writing as I print it out.
3 posted on 10/31/2001 2:52:56 AM PST by ConservativeLibrarian
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To: mikewats
Ahh,the good old days!

You made me laugh,happy Halloween.

4 posted on 10/31/2001 2:53:44 AM PST by mdittmar
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To: mikewats
Fabulous job with that!
5 posted on 10/31/2001 2:56:24 AM PST by Straight Vermonter
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To: mikewats
Good stuff!

Opera Without Music. Har!

6 posted on 10/31/2001 2:57:49 AM PST by Glenn
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To: mikewats
Instant classic. Perhaps a new genre is born...
7 posted on 10/31/2001 2:58:10 AM PST by FreepTibet
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To: mikewats
But...but....there's going to be a big full moon out on Halloween night, the first one since 1955. It would be the perfect time for the Martians to land, you know.

LOL, you are funny!

8 posted on 10/31/2001 2:59:14 AM PST by xJones
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To: mikewats
Hey - that's not funny, man.
I am going to hit "abuse" and hope this thread gets pulled.
A lot of people thought you were for real.
I ran outside with my family and we all hid in a old culvert for over 3 hours.

ps. too bad them Mars critters had not heard of Cipro.
They all died of the common cold, as I remember.

9 posted on 10/31/2001 3:02:29 AM PST by error99
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To: mikewats
Great fun posting. Thank You.
You must have way to much spare time.
10 posted on 10/31/2001 3:02:33 AM PST by ASA Vet
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Comment #11 Removed by Moderator

To: mikewats
Brilliant!

I used to have the double album of the whole show. When I was a kid, I would listen to it on Holloween and it spooked me senseless.

12 posted on 10/31/2001 3:03:06 AM PST by Skooz
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To: mikewats
Beauty!
13 posted on 10/31/2001 3:03:53 AM PST by Old Fud
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To: mikewats
BREAKING!!! HYDROGEN GAS EXPLOSIONS OCCURRING ON MARS!

Move along folks, nothing to see here .....

(I couldn't help it)

LOL

14 posted on 10/31/2001 3:04:43 AM PST by freedomlover
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To: mikewats
Bravo! Lamming it in the Hupmobile!! You should have your keyboard bronzed for this one.
15 posted on 10/31/2001 3:04:52 AM PST by babble-on
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To: mikewats
LOOSE LIPS SINK SHIPS !
Please do not post any personal information that you may have obtained
about on-going Martian military operations in your area.
16 posted on 10/31/2001 3:05:04 AM PST by error99
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To: mikewats
nice...lol
17 posted on 10/31/2001 3:07:32 AM PST by surfer
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To: NoCurrentFreeperByThatName
great work

randystone

18 posted on 10/31/2001 3:07:40 AM PST by randystone
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To: mikewats
Nuke all the Martians NOW !!!
19 posted on 10/31/2001 3:08:04 AM PST by error99
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To: mikewats
I don't get it. The tinfoil must be interfering with my reception. I'll try the TV. Oh, wait. There is no TV yet...Arrrrrrrgggggghhhhhh!!!!
20 posted on 10/31/2001 3:14:21 AM PST by Fresh Wind
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In an unrelated news article, I read this morning that Newport News Shipbuilding just delivered the U.S.S. THUNDERCHILD to the Navy. The ship's commanding officer, Commander George Wells, spoke at the commissioning and said "She's going to be a good ship, a hot ship. Our job is to go in harm's way, but that's nothing alien to us."
21 posted on 10/31/2001 3:15:34 AM PST by Jonah Hex
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To: mikewats
The sincerest form of flattery.......post #5.......... ;^)

Seriously, good work.

22 posted on 10/31/2001 3:15:43 AM PST by Lazamataz
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To: mikewats
Outstanding!

Weird! They introduced the “Secretary of the Interior”, but it sounded just like Roosevelt.

That wacky J. Edgar, what will he think of next?

23 posted on 10/31/2001 3:18:26 AM PST by TheyConvictedOglethorpe
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To: mikewats
Maybe it is a hoax but I'm not taking any chances.
24 posted on 10/31/2001 3:18:36 AM PST by AppyPappy
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To: Fresh Wind
There is no proof that they are martians. It could be a VRWC that is using the explosions on mars as an opportunity to attack.
25 posted on 10/31/2001 3:19:22 AM PST by Gadsden1st
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To: mikewats
Thanks for a good laugh in the AM! Nice work!
26 posted on 10/31/2001 3:21:44 AM PST by FreedomPoster
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To: mikewats
Listening to the radio with the lights OFF!

CBS Now reporting U.S. military targeting "civilian" Martians

What the sam hill is a "civilian " Martian??

I'm sick of these commie journalists!!

27 posted on 10/31/2001 3:24:19 AM PST by mdittmar
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To: mikewats
Nice work.
28 posted on 10/31/2001 3:25:08 AM PST by Double Tap
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To: *bang_list
Break out the sport utility rifles and make sure all those evil 20, 30, and 40 round magazines are fully charged - the Martians are coming! All citizens in the militia should report to their muster locations, fully equipped for battle with the enemy.

Click on the pistol to display the latest FreeRepublic 'bang_list' posts.

29 posted on 10/31/2001 3:25:45 AM PST by FreedomPoster
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To: mikewats
Just my way of saying Happy Halloween to everybody who posts on Free Republic.

Nicely done.  You're either old enough to have been there or you're a heckuva good historian.  "Feen-A-Mint?"  Hadn't heard that brand in a long, long while!

 America's Fifth Column ... watch PBS documentary JIHAD! In America -- here

 For better viewing download 8Mb file here

30 posted on 10/31/2001 3:31:45 AM PST by JCG
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To: mikewats
Hey, thanks for the levity, brother.
(Is this really how FreeRepubic was in the old days? Gosh, my dad was a freeper for a few years when he got back from Italy after the war. Glad the days of kerosene-powered PCs are long gone).
31 posted on 10/31/2001 3:40:58 AM PST by Psalm 73
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To: AppyPappy
Maybe it is a hoax but I'm not taking any chances.

Maybe this was the warning Tom Ridge was issuing.

32 posted on 10/31/2001 3:41:49 AM PST by Lazamataz
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To: Lazamataz; sinkspur
The pollyannas like Sinkspur will find out soon enough.
33 posted on 10/31/2001 3:44:04 AM PST by AppyPappy
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To: mikewats
BUMP!! This is GREAT! A classic already!
34 posted on 10/31/2001 3:46:51 AM PST by American72
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To: AppyPappy
The pollyannas like Sinkspur will find out soon enough.

I miss Michael Rivero.

He would have proved that the hydrogen explosions originated in the center fuel tank.

35 posted on 10/31/2001 3:47:57 AM PST by Lazamataz
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To: mikewats
Very creative! I could see something like this happening if there had been an internet back when the Martians really did land - or was that just a hoax? My grandmother swears it really happens and the government covered it up, but if so, where are the Martians now?

Anyway, that radio play couldn't have been based on H.G. Wells' book, because the book was set in England and the Martians invaded here. So it really did happen and they might be coming back!

36 posted on 10/31/2001 3:48:24 AM PST by JenB
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To: mikewats
It's like de-ja-vu all over again!
37 posted on 10/31/2001 3:51:59 AM PST by Destructor
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To: JenB
My grandmother swears it really happens and the government covered it up, but if so, where are the Martians now?

They put towels on their heads and moved to the Mideast.

38 posted on 10/31/2001 4:01:00 AM PST by Lazamataz
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To: mikewats
Wow! Absolutely brilliant! Kudos to you. I really needed this today. =)
39 posted on 10/31/2001 4:03:13 AM PST by Aggie Mama
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To: mikewats
This is truly a keeper. Spot on parody. Beauty, man....
40 posted on 10/31/2001 4:06:06 AM PST by Uncle Fud
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To: mikewats
That's incredible! Your hard work on writing that is greatly appreciated. Love the 1930's Freeper names, too (especially the screen name "Prof Forrester"!).
41 posted on 10/31/2001 4:07:18 AM PST by Moonmad27
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To: Lazamataz
Me 'n the boys just went out, jest a'drivin' around with our rifles, an' one of the fellers thought he spied one of the Martians. Well, we let go a horrific fuselade, and got all sprayed with water. Turns out it was just a water tower. But y'kin never be too careful. Better t'shoot first.

Sincerely, Old Man Drucker

42 posted on 10/31/2001 4:15:30 AM PST by Wm Bach
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To: mikewats
LOL...thanks for the great post. Great work, too. Happy Halloween, and happy birthday Hubby!
43 posted on 10/31/2001 4:15:36 AM PST by cake_crumb
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To: mikewats
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ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US!!

29 posted on 10/31/38 5:15 AM Pacific by Whitey Marsh

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See how old that is.

44 posted on 10/31/2001 4:15:52 AM PST by michigander
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To: mikewats
Excellent!! Happy Halloween to everyone
45 posted on 10/31/2001 4:19:24 AM PST by billbears
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To: mikewats
Simply fabulous! Have a safe Halloween!
46 posted on 10/31/2001 4:27:12 AM PST by ncpastor
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To: mikewats; AppyPappy; Lazamataz; sinkspur; Nita Nupress; harpseal; Dog Gone; Jethro Tull; diotima...
Hey! I resemble that "pollyanna" remark! Now, where did I leave that key to the bunker...

Bump for HILARITY!

47 posted on 10/31/2001 4:28:58 AM PST by RedWing9
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To: Lazamataz
Cute history! I like it.
48 posted on 10/31/2001 4:32:05 AM PST by freedom4ever
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To: error99
Nuke all the Martians NOW !!!

Klaatu: "Klaatu Barada Nikto"

Helen: "Gort, Klaatu Barada Nikto.... Klaatu Barada Nikto"

Me: Head for the hills!!!

49 posted on 10/31/2001 4:43:25 AM PST by mc5cents
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To: mc5cents
A Klaatu reunion tour? Cool!

They're really the Beetle's, you know.

50 posted on 10/31/2001 4:51:25 AM PST by Vortex
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