Free Republic
Browse · Search
Religion
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

Catholic Hardware Store Sued for Refusing to Sell Gay Extension Cord [Satire? or Prophetic?]
Catholic Vote ^ | 7/6/15 | John White

Posted on 07/07/2015 1:48:33 AM PDT by markomalley

The Catholic owners of “Joe’s Hardware” in Atchison, Kansas are defending themselves against a federal lawsuit that accuses them of violating equal protection laws because they refused to sell a same-sex extension cord to a customer last month.

The plaintiff in the lawsuit is Flip Rosco, a poodle trainer from Greenwich Village. During a press conference announcing the lawsuit, Mr. Rosco caused some initial confusion when he was asked what he was doing in Atchison in the first place. “Looking for a Catholic hardware store to sue,” he proclaimed, to a few raised eyebrows. “Love wins,” he quickly added, which seemed to satisfy the assembled crowd.

Joe and Abby Smith, the owners of the family-run hardware business and long-time members at St. Agnes, the local parish, were caught completely off guard by the allegations. The Smiths are adamant that they didn’t discriminate against anyone.

“I remember when this fella came in to the store,” recalled Joe. “I asked him if I could help him find anything. He gave me kind of a sly look and said he wanted to buy a gay extension cord. I told him we didn’t carry those but maybe I could special order it, and that’s when he started screaming at me that he was going to sue us. It’s just crazy. What the hell is a gay extension cord anyway?”

Abby Smith was just as upset. “This whole thing just came out of nowhere,” she said. “We just want to serve our customers and practice our faith. Up until now, we’ve been able to do both without any problem. Now we’re looking at legal fees, a long court battle, and goodness knows what else. Maybe even jail.”

“Probably jail,” added Justice Anthony Kennedy. “But it’s okay because at the heart of liberty is the right to define your own concept of existence, of persecution, of your prison cell, and who knows, maybe even elimination for the greater good if you keep trying to exercise your religion instead of just worshiping your God in private like a good citizen.”

Supporters on both sides of the issue have taken to social media to debate the moral, constitutional, and electrical merits of plugging the kitchen into the living room.

Stay tuned, America.


TOPICS: Catholic; Humor
KEYWORDS: homofascism; homosexualagenda
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-2021 next last
While the article, itself, is satire...how long will it be before the pinkshirts start to do something similar? After all, they seek out bakeries, photographers, and florists right now...
1 posted on 07/07/2015 1:48:33 AM PDT by markomalley
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies]

To: markomalley

My question is, Is it straight-thru or cross-over?


2 posted on 07/07/2015 1:53:50 AM PDT by cynwoody
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: markomalley

Maybe.....Christian businesses could start placing a Christian symbol or verse on all products produced. If its standard practice for ALL production can it be prohibited?


3 posted on 07/07/2015 1:55:29 AM PDT by Josa
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: markomalley
"he wanted to buy a gay extension cord"

AC/DC?

4 posted on 07/07/2015 2:22:38 AM PDT by outofsalt ( If history teaches us anything it's that history rarely teaches us anything.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: cynwoody

A gay extension cord will have a male plug at each end.


5 posted on 07/07/2015 2:29:41 AM PDT by Fresh Wind (Falcon 105)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: Fresh Wind

A gay extension cord will have a male plug at each end.

And be pretty much useless for anything.


6 posted on 07/07/2015 2:55:00 AM PDT by Adder (No, Mr. Franklin, we could NOT keep it.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 5 | View Replies]

To: Adder

We make them up to feed juice from the generator into the house wiring once the mains are shut. Used it for ten days during hurricane sandy aftermath


7 posted on 07/07/2015 3:25:31 AM PDT by Vaquero ( Don't pick a fight with an old guy. If he is too old to fight, he'll just kill you.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 6 | View Replies]

To: markomalley

WHY I HAVE AN ILLUMINATED CROSS AS A PROTEST

When are those so called democrats who are really “democratic” in name only and belong to a political party which espouses one perfect world socialist state ever going to be called out on their core beliefs ? Nooo that wouldn’t be bi-partisan !

Ask any of those so called GOPES (Government Over the People Elite Statists) campaign advisors about depressing the “democrat” vote and you get a lecture.Democrat core beliefs showed up with booing the mention of God in 2012 which made it official.

They’ve declared a war on religion because it opposes their agenda particularly Christianity.Which I for one now have an illumiuated crucifix at night in my front yard facing the street (Highway) as a statement. And encourage others do as well

A DEMOCRAT apparently doesn’t believe there’s such a thing as the Ten Commandments or sin because everything that leaves their mouths is a lie. But I have yet to hear a Republican candidate even suggest even in jest mention why “democrat” lying is part of their core belief ? Never mind the use of their positions promoting crony capitalism campaign contributers who took our money to finance alternate energy plans spending billions that went belly up at our expense while leaving our infastructure to fall apart......

Why ? Because it isn’t being bi-partisan or lets not forget the other trap being politically correct.. Which is nothing more than a perverted effort to silence opposition to a socialist agenda.


8 posted on 07/07/2015 4:33:05 AM PDT by mosesdapoet (Some of my best rebuttals are in FR's along with meaningless venting no one reads.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: markomalley

Well, if you get both a gay and a lesbian extension cord, you can plug one into the other and make a regular cord. With regard to people, the comparable image is rather horrifying.


9 posted on 07/07/2015 4:47:48 AM PDT by NewHampshireDuo
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Fresh Wind
A gay extension cord will have a male plug at each end.

A cheap, dangerous, illegal way to refeed an open (broken) circuit in your home from another source (such as a generator or another outlet that still works)

Cheap because you don't have to have an electrician fix the original problem. Dangerous and illegal for the same reason, among others

10 posted on 07/07/2015 4:59:16 AM PDT by ZOOKER (Until further notice the /s is implied...)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 5 | View Replies]

To: markomalley
The Catholic owners of “Joe’s Hardware” in Atchison, Kansas are defending themselves against a federal lawsuit that accuses them of violating equal protection laws because they refused to sell a same-sex extension cord to a customer last month. The plaintiff in the lawsuit is Flip Rosco, a poodle trainer from Greenwich Village. During a press conference announcing the lawsuit, Mr. Rosco caused some initial confusion when he was asked what he was doing in Atchison in the first place. “Looking for a Catholic hardware store to sue,” he proclaimed, to a few raised eyebrows. “Love wins,” he quickly added, which seemed to satisfy the assembled crowd.

The plaintiff:

Waiting for Guffman

11 posted on 07/07/2015 5:03:30 AM PDT by Alex Murphy ("the defacto Leader of the FR Calvinist Protestant Brigades")
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: markomalley
Consciencous Objector Status?
12 posted on 07/07/2015 6:01:35 AM PDT by CPT Clay
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Adder
A gay extension cord will have a male plug at each end.

And they only use it by plugging it in somewhere it doesn't belong.

13 posted on 07/07/2015 6:27:05 AM PDT by FirstFlaBn
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 6 | View Replies]

To: markomalley

LOL! Or is it more appropriate to sob.


14 posted on 07/07/2015 6:33:09 AM PDT by Gamecock (Why do bad things happen to good people? That only happened once, and He volunteered. R.C. Sproul)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Adder

You can actually use a male-to-male extension cord, although not without some risk - You can extend AC from a workbench with power to another one by plugging the cord into a socket on each bench.


15 posted on 07/07/2015 6:34:38 AM PDT by Bob (No, being a US Senator and the Secretary of State are not accomplishments; they're jobs.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 6 | View Replies]

To: markomalley

A gay extension cord? Wow... and I thought they were all straight.


16 posted on 07/07/2015 6:36:58 AM PDT by kjam22 (my music video "If My People" at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=74b20RjILy4)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Fresh Wind

That contraption is also referred to as a suicide cord.


17 posted on 07/07/2015 6:37:01 AM PDT by Cboldt
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 5 | View Replies]

To: Gamecock

If we were gamblers, we might place bets on how long before reality overtakes satire.

Again.


18 posted on 07/07/2015 6:39:31 AM PDT by NorthMountain ("The time has come", the Walrus said, "to talk of many things")
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 14 | View Replies]

To: Fresh Wind

“A gay extension cord will have a male plug at each end.”
++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

However, it could have two female ends as well.

And if the extension cord is a MALE-MALE it will have a male plug at each end.

Which means when plugged in will EXPOSE 120 Volts AC electrical current, which is a mortally dangerous and irresponsible and chaotic and a vicious inhuman thing to do. (Just like Sodomy.)

And Sodomy has the force of (law????) behind it now.

So the prosecutor may have a case here. Stay tuned.


19 posted on 07/07/2015 6:39:53 AM PDT by Repent and Believe (...prelates must be questioned, even publicly, by their subjects. - Saint Thomas Aquinas)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 5 | View Replies]

To: markomalley

If you’re going to write a parody then I suggest you pick a state where homosexuals are a protected ciass. Kansas law doesn’t prohibit discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation.


20 posted on 07/07/2015 6:45:02 AM PDT by DoodleDawg
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-2021 next last

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
Religion
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson