Posted on 12/07/2005 7:00:09 PM PST by Tzimisce
Lines you can use:
"Hello I'm an oppressed Homosexual"
"My name is Akmed. I'm from Palistine and I'm a victim of the US corporate military establishment."
"So Cindy, I hear you're single now."
"Didn't I see you at Woodstock '69?"
"Are you the actress that played grieving mother number three in landmark documentary 'Fahrenheit 9-11'?"
"Yeah I'm a big mover and shaker down at the rest home."
"I dodged the draft in '67."
"Pass the joint."
"Hey baby, what are we protesting again?"
"The plight of women in this culture is awful. When will men stop treating women like sex objects? Wanna go back to my place?"
"I know Alec Baldwin."
"Hey sweetie, I was President from 1992 to 2000 and my wife is in Washington right now. Wanna go for a ride?"
"The rich get away with everything! Wanna discuss Marx over lunch on my yacht?"
"When we go for the die in, you can lay on top of me instead of the cold ground if you want."
"You can hand cuff yourself next to me on the fence if you want."
"Hey baby, I'm a starving artist and have to fly to Paris on a private jet tonight for a show in Paris tomorrow all by myself. I could sure use some company."
"I'm trying to get a degree in Women's studies, but I'm having trouble with the chapter on sexuality. Can you help me?"
The tried and true Clinton pick up line, "I feel your pain."
An old cowboy sat down at the bar and ordered a drink. As he sat sipping his drink a young woman sat down next to him. She turned to the cowboy and asked "Are you a real cowboy?" He replied "Well, I've spent my whole life breaking colts, working cows, going to rodeos, fixing fences, pulling calves, bailing hay, doctoring calves, cleaning my barn, fixing flats, working on tractors, and feeding my dogs, so I guess I am a cowboy." She said "I'm a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about women. As soon as Iget up in the morning, I think about women. When I shower, I think about women. When I watch TV, I think about women. I even think about womenwhen I eat. It seems that everything makes me think of women.
The two sat sipping in silence.
A little while later, a man sat down on the other side of the old cowboy and asked, "Are you a real cowboy?" He replied, "I always thought I was, but I just found out I'm a lesbian."
Motherly statement made to pimple faced brat at the march in Sept. No matter how hard you try you aren't going to get laid.
Hey babe, is that a ketchup fortune in your pocket?
Wanna Play With My Beeber?
LOL! Berry good!
"You can leave your Birkenstocks on, baby!"
We were killing the enemy before killing the enemy was cool.....
"Didn't I see you at a Barry McGuire concert?"
May I ravage you in a fashion reminiscent of jenjis kahn?
"Shall we burn your bra together?"
I have a rule for picking up women in bars:
If I thought I could, I probably wouldn't want to.
That applies to Leftist gatherings, X 2.
"Aren't those Negroes groovy?"
... Hey, Ann Coulter is speaking on campus tonight. Wanna go shout her down and throw food at her?"
"Have you seen the Dixie Chicks in concert? They're awesome!"
"How about those North Koreans, heh?"
Hey baby! I haven't bathed or cut my hair since the Carter administration!
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