Posted on 12/18/2007 5:38:27 PM PST by ncoaster
Every child is a gift, as the saying goes. But in a case that has stoked outrage on two continents, a Dutch diplomat posted in Hong Kong has been accused of returning his eight-year-old adopted daughter like an unwanted Christmas necktie.
The story, which first appeared in the South China Morning Post on Dec. 9, began seven years ago, when Dutch vice consul Raymond Poeteray and his wife, Meta, adopted then-four-months-old Jade in South Korea. The couple, who also have two biological children, brought Jade with them to Indonesia and then to Hong Kong in 2004, although Poeteray never applied for Dutch nationality for the child — a curious oversight, given that he worked in a consulate. Then, last year, the Poeterays put Jade in the care of Hong Kong's Social Welfare Department, saying they could no longer care for her because of the girl's emotional remoteness.
(Excerpt) Read more at time.com ...
We adopted an 11y/o from overseas recently. There are times that it’s a temptation — but I would no sooner “return” the child than to sell one of my “biologicals” into slavery. Adoption should be like child-birth; they’re yours for keeps.
WOW! It seems that it would be difficult to adopt an older child. I admire you!
I guess the kid was just a fashion accessory, once she wasn’t super cute anymore, time to get a new one. Horrible people.
a bit young to have been affected by "severe form of fear of emotional attachment." - unless, I highly suspicion, that the parents, particularly mummie-dearest, was too busy with her society socials to give the baby any crucial "emotional attachment" - but treated the poor child like a toy to possess but let a hired hand take care of.
I do hope their karma catches up with them - and some loving person will take this little girl in
Wow. They kept her for seven years and then decided this wasn’t working? What are they thinking?
All three of my kids were from orphanages. Two were relatively unaffected because they were adopted at 9 mos and 1 year. However, one was pretty closed emotionally, after three years in a state run orphanage.
We never dreamed of giving up on any of them. The one we had the most fears about grew to be a warm, open and talented young man. He’s 17 now and he’s such a joy.
Yeah, right! What creeps this guy and his pompous looking wife are...!
I did quite a bit of research on attachment disorder when my kids were young. You are indeed correct. Orphanage kids are not the only ones who fail to attach. They just need a succession on nannies.
You’re correct on the other point, too. Four month olds don’t come with attachment disorder.
The first was with a couple who, even though adopting an infant, expected the child to magically grow up a well behaved Asian child like those they had seen in the country from which they adopted the child.
In the second instance, when the wife had children or her own, they turned the adopted child into a servant.
Both cases seem as cruel and absurd as this one. Hopefully this child can be placed with decent people.
What do you expect from a modern Dutch couple?
Oh well, that is why dogs are cats are so much better.
My wife and I still grieve over that incident but God is good!
All the time.
He gave us two other miracle children - one natural and the other adopted.
We know they came from the hand of God. If they could figure out where we came from, they'd return US in a moment: without questions and with no debate.
When my kids hit the teen years I found myself wondering if there was a way to return a biological child.
I have told more than one teenager, that when they are teens and act awful is why some species eat their young.
The youth pastor from my church adopted two little girls from China. They are absolutely adorable. The oldest one is now 6 or 7. She is so cute and so loving. The youngest one must now be 5 and she is too cute. The couple has several older biological child as well. The whole family treat the adopted children just like the biological children.
One way to “adopt” a foreign child is to host a foreign exchange student for a school year. The bad news is that they are teenagers so some of them can be a challenge, but they do go home after one year. Some of them are an absolute joy, so it is very hard when they do go back home. I kept trying to send my biological son “back” to Germany while keeping my exchange student, but alas, that was not to be. I don’t get it, I thought that it was an exchange! LOL
we adopted a five-year old... he is now 11... the first 3 years were rather difficult... not entirely difficult, but difficult nonetheless... our son is ours through and through... and so is his brother (who was a baby when we adopted him)... if the adults just keep in mind that it's not about them, and if they don't take the child's behavior personally, they can work through it... it is a sacrifice... one that we have found well-worth making...
Bookmarked
Can an adopted child be returned?
Only with the original receipt and within thirty days./s/
I don’t even have the heart to turn out the two dogs my daughter brought home and left behind when she move to the opposite coast.......they love us........though I have been tempted I could never look in their eyes and leave them...it would kill me.
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