Stasi: Ted Cruz had five mistresses? I can't find one woman who would sleep with him

New York Daily News ^ | March 27, 2016 | Linda Stasi

[Kaslin]

The National Enquirer should retract their outlandish story that Sen. Ted Cruz had affairs with five women outside the bonds of his holy matrimony.

After this incredible and scandalous story broke, I was personally so outraged and disgusted that I did just like a candidate would do and hired a very expensive and classy research firm to do a poll.

It was time to make America not just great again, but time for all Americans to know: Was Ted great in bed?

The nationwide survey showed that the truth is much more shocking even than the allegation that Ted had five lovers.

Tragically, pollsters could not find one woman in the United States, Puerto Rico, Guam, Northern Mariana Islands, the U.S. Virgin Islands or American Samoa who wants to have sex with Ted Cruz.

Even the high-priced D.C. call girl alluded to in the Enquirer story immediately gave up sex, fired her answering service and sued her madam for creating a hostile work environment just for sending her out Cruising. “I thought my booker said Tom Cruise!” Mistress X told a source. “Imagine my horror when a man opened the door dressed as an apostle!”

[SueRae]

HAahahahaha..

[onona]

If you ever have a chance to listen to Linda Stasi, DON’T. Hate monger loon.

[WeatherGuy]

..or he’s not vain enough to purchase the ridiculous guinea pig that your BFF wears on head.

[Kaslin]

I have never seen a booger that moves from the inside of the mouth and looks white like a morsel of food to his lower lip and than to his upper lip. I watched the video several times btw and there is seriously something mentally wrong with those who believe the nonsense that he ate his booger. Did it never happen to you that you some morsel of food stuck in your mouth that you had eaten earlier? Besides boogers are greenish-gray in color not white.

Now aren't you embarrassed of making a fool of yourself? You should be

[relentlessly]

[LucyT]

Some women will have sex if they are paid enough money.

Just sayin’...

[faithhopecharity]

If old Hillary can have a girl friend, so can Ted!

[DesertRhino]

Well, don’t get mad at me. I didn’t make the world, I just live here. But here’s the way it is.

Men F beauty. Women F power. Power can be expressed as vast wealth, political power, or the ability to prevail in individual combat or its metaphor, athletics. A few women even see power in the immense self discipline needed to live up to a religious code.

This explains everything as to who women will bed down with.

[Kaslin]

Found a picture of some fat guy with a chick on the internet and that is supposed to prove something?

ttp://bbsimg.ngfiles.com/1/3411000/ngbbs41619393ee0a5.jpg

[Kaslin]

Yes he does. He and his wife have two little girls together. It was that supermarket rag the Enquirer who made the story sleazy and it is interesting that none of the women he supposedly did have an affair with had come out and admitted it

[libertylover]

This story is an example of how/why the media have so missed the boat on Cruz and Trump. The thought of liberty and freedom is so repulsive to them that they can’t stand Cruz and Trump.

[gubamyster]

True, but I don’t think anyone is out there on their knees telling people they are not Christians if they don’t vote for Trump.

[Savage Beast]

If they’ll go for Bill Clinton and John Edwards, they’ll definitely go for Cruz.

[manc]

Power and money attracts many types to many types

[sauropod]

Sorry Linda. No one wants to sleep with you either.

Looks like your scratches missed the litter box!

[trisham]

LOL!

[trisham]

That has to be the best post of the thread!

[Georgia Girl 2]

If Teddy had anything and that is still in question it was more likely hookups which denotes short term duration and lack of emotional attachment.

[driftdiver]

In fact at least one has come out and publicly denied it.

[pogo101]

Stay classy.