Restroom Signs (18 and over language)

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[pocat]

Just recieved this in an email from a friend. I'm not sure if these signs are actually in the locations stated, but it would be appropriate. Enjoy.

Friends don't let friends take home ugly men ---Women's restroom, Starboard, Dewey Beach, DE

Remember, it's not, "How high are you?" It's "Hi, how are you?" ---Rest stop off Route 81, West Virginia

No matter how good she looks, some other guy is sick and tired of putting up with her shit. ---Men's Room, Linda's Bar and Grill, Chapel Hill, North Carolina

To do is to be - Descartes To be is to do - Voltaire Do be do be do - Frank Sinatra ---Men's restroom, Greasewood Flats, Scottsdale, Arizona

Make love, not war.-Hell, do both, get married! ---Women's restroom, The Filling Station, Bozeman, Montana

A Woman's Rule of Thumb: If it has tires or testicles, you're going to have trouble with it. ---Women's restroom, Dick's Last Resort, Dallas, Texas

Watch out for Gay Limbo Dancers ---Inside toilet stall door, Men's restroom

Express Lane: Five beers or less ---Sign over one of the urinals, Ed Debevic's, Beverly Hills, CA

You're too good for him. ---Sign over mirror in Women's restroom, Ed Debevics, Beverly Hill, CA

No wonder you always go home alone. ---Sign over mirror in Men's restroom, Ed Debevic's, Beverly Hills, CA

The best way to a man's heart is to saw his breast plate open. ---Women's restroom, Murphy's, Champaign, IL

If you voted for Clinton in the last election, you can't take a dump here. Your asshole is in Washington. ---Men's room Outback Steakhouse, Tacoma, Washington

Beauty is only a light switch away. ---Perkins Library, Duke University, Durham, North Carolina.

I've decided that to raise my grades I must lower my standards. ---Houghton Library, Harvard University, Cambridge, Massachusetts.

If life is a waste of time, and time is a waste of life, then let's get wasted together and have the time of our lives. ---Armand's Pizza, Washington, D.C.

God made pot. Man made beer. Who do you trust? ---The Irish Times, Washington, D.C.

At the feast of ego, everyone leaves hungry. ---Bentley's House of Coffee and Tea, Tucson, Arizona

It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere. ---Written in the dust on the back of a bus, Wickenburg, Arizona.

If voting could really change things, it would be illegal. ---Revolution Books, New York, New York

Don't trust anything that bleeds for 5 days and doesn't die. ---Men's restroom, Murphy's, Champaign, IL

What are you looking up on the wall for? The joke is in your hands. ---Men's restroom, Lynagh's, Lexington, KY

[davisfh]

Don't remember where this one came from except that I saw it
on a condom machine years ago. "Don't buy any of this gum.
It tastes like rubber."

[saurus]

Saw one over a urinal:

"Please don't eat the big pink mints"

[southernnorthcarolina]

Sign over a urinal:

We aim to please. You aim too, please.

[TightSqueeze]

My favorite is;

“Veni Veni WeeWee!" – Men’s Room Harvard Club, NYC

BTW been to Greasewood Flats and saw that one too, a keeper.

[TightSqueeze]

“Veni Veni WeeWee! = "Veni, Vidi, WeeWee"

Can’t even get a damn joke right today. Sheese

[BlessingInDisguise]

Oohhh naughty language. I best cover my ears!! Please censor this from me!!

[Freedom4US]

We don't piss in your ashtrays, please don't throw cigarette butts in the urinals.

[Lokibob]

Seen in a construction portapottie:"Here I sit;Tired and dirty; Hiding from the foreman; Till 3:30".

[BlessingInDisguise]

I would laf

[StACase]

Here I sit broken hearted;
Came to sh*t and only farted

[maxwell]

Here I sit broken hearted;
Came to sh*t and only farted

BWAHAHA! Ain't that the truth...

[in the Arena]

"If you sprinkle when you tinkle...
Be a sweety wipe the seaty..."

My daughter found this in a gas station in Flagstaff Arizona.

[Kerberos]

"What are you looking up on the wall for? The joke is in your hands. ---Men's restroom, Lynagh's, Lexington, KY"

I saw that one in a restroom at Old Faithful when I was a kid.

[Non-Sequitur]

"Our lads are laid, our anchors are weighed, and we're the fools that our mother's made" - stall in an Officers Head onboard the second ship I served on. I wish I could say that I wrote it but I didn't.

[DJtex]

"Time is just nature's way of keeping everything from happening all at once!"

Seen by me on a men's room stall at U.T. Austin.

[Knitebane]

You left out the second stanza:

Thought I'd give it a second chance;

Tried to fart and sh*t my pants.

[Jhoffa_]

Speaking of bathroom signs. I was in the carribean once, and I don't speak spanish.

Soooo, naturally when I walked into what I thought was the men's room (it was all in spanish, hell I didn't know) and noticed the commodes all had stalls I thought "wow, this is really nice..." and then I noticed how clean it was..

I only realized my mistake when I passed a woman on her way in as I was leaving.

Needless to say, the Managment watched me very closely after that..

[d4now]

You might need this. I did.