Posted on 07/01/2002 11:45:12 PM PDT by scripter
"I did not choose to be homosexual. I would change my sexual orientation if that were within my power."
So wrote Robert Bauman, the powerful, ultraconservative congressman from Maryland. Americans were stunned in 1980 when headlines revealed Bauman had been caught having a sexual rendezvous with a young male prostitute. In his book, "The Gentleman From Maryland: The Conscience of a Gay Conservative," Bauman revealed the conditions that shaped his own tortured double life as a congressman and closet homosexual.
At the tender age of 5, Bauman had been sexually seduced by a neighbor boy about 12. Reflecting on that pivotal experience, as well as subsequent similar episodes, Bauman describes the powerful feelings he found welling up within him at a young age:
This was not a matter of chance attraction to a forbidden object. This was a frightening force from deep within my being, an involuntary reaction to the sight, smell, and feel of other boys. I neither understood nor accepted it.
And I came to hate myself because of the presence within me of this horrible weakness, this uncleanness of spirit over which I seemed to have no control. So added to the loneliness was a growing but barely perceived self-loathing. Hadn't I always known that something was wrong with me?
Wasn't that why God took my mom away from me? Didn't they send me away to school because I was bad? And now this strange internal desire was further confirmation of just how unworthy a person I was.
Nearly four decades later it seems easy to dramatize the thoughts of an introspective 8-year-old boy. At the time it was overpowering, but not nearly so dramatic. Drama requires an audience and I was determined that no one would ever know about the turmoil going on inside. I was sure my predicament was a unique punishment designed only for me.
Unable to understand it myself, I could never even attempt an explanation to someone else. I countered my dilemma with a plan that constituted the essence of simplicity. I made up my mind that I was not "queer." I heard all those denunciations of homos by my military school peers and firmly resolved I could never be considered one of such a despicable breed.
To buttress my intellectual conviction of purity, I was required to construct a whole series of mental fortifications to protect and conceal the real me, not just from the external world, but from myself as well. In time, the turreted, crenellated walls grew into a self-impressive battlement like the infamous Maginot Line … And like that ill-conceived strategy, when the time came, my own defenses crumbled, not just in one ultimate test, but repeatedly.
Bauman was elected in 1973 as representative of the first congressional district of Maryland. He led a double life as a married man with four children, while at the same time engaging in anonymous homosexual one-night stands. He describes the wrenching emotional aftermath he experienced after each such episode:
Each time I would feel great guilt and head for Saturday confession at St. Peter's or St. Joseph's on Capitol Hill so I could make amends with God and be in the state of grace for Sunday Communion. I would always vow to myself and God I would never do it again.
I blotted out my doubts, my actions, submerging myself in the excitement of politics where compliments, victories and deference helped reassure me I was a good person. Rather than accept myself as I was, I fought for symbols and abstractions promising greater glory and meaning to my life. If I could save the world, I might avoid having to save myself.
My own selfish goal was to conceal the truth. Looking back, it is difficult to believe the degree of insanity marking my own self-deception and that I tried to impose on my wife.
How could any normal and moral human being do what I did? How could anyone, however callous, repeatedly be unfaithful to one's spouse (lying, evading responsibility, breaking solemn vows)? I have described how it could be done. Why I did it is the serious question. And I have no answer, even to this day. I do not know.
In many ways, I was driven by a force over which I seemed to have little control. Of course, my choice was conscious and deliberate. It could have been altered. But some compulsion drove me, blotting out all I had learned, diminishing in importance all that was most dear and important. I seemed willing to risk my marriage, my wife and children, even life itself.
And yet I felt compelled to act as I did. Some inner force drove me, and repeatedly pursuing this insane conduct made it more difficult to resist each time I was tempted again.
Most amazing was my failure to consider asking for help. Each time I would feel shame, remorse and guilt. That tough trio of emotions gnawed at me constantly, I prayed for deliverance, went to confession, always at a church where the priest would not know me.
Sometimes I would go for weeks, even months, without incident, and then something would set me off: a period of depression, an event that brought elation. Setback or triumph, there was no set pattern of causation each time, but repetition seemed inevitable. I could not accept my own sexuality and I acted in public consistent with my religious and moral beliefs, even if my private life was totally inconsistent.
In 1980, at the age of 43, Bauman saw his political career come crashing down upon him following the exposure of his solicitation of a teen-age male hustler. He subsequently lost his re-election bid, as well as his family, his historic home and many of his powerful friends.
Doing unto others
OK, rewind tape to age 5.
Bauman, poignantly recounting his tortured life, confesses that he was seduced by an older boy at that tender and exquisitely vulnerable age.
Did that experience plant in Bauman the seed of his future homosexuality?
It would seem so, despite today's wishful but unsubstantiated claims of a "gay gene." According to the peer-reviewed 1998 study, "Sexual Abuse of Boys," by William C. Holmes, M.D., and Gail B. Slap, M.D., sexually abused young males "were up to seven times more likely to self-identify as gay or bisexual than peers who had not been abused."
What about the 12-year-old? Why does he sexually seduce a 5-year-old boy?
No doubt he's just doing to a new kid what was done to him.
Since children are so impressionable, sexual seduction or assault is a major trauma that can, and often does, literally re-program the victim's identity – his view of who and what he is. While the study cited above seems to confirm this, the point is self-evident: prisons are full of child-molesters who were molested as children and batterers who were battered as children.
The 12-year-old very likely felt compelled to convert the innocent, the uninitiated.
An innocent young child has a "bright-light" quality that feels strangely threatening to those in the grip of corruption. This explains a great deal of child abuse.
To the person who's been "re-programmed," it's deeply satisfying – far beyond mere sexual pleasure – to "initiate" an innocent person. Doing so serves to anesthetize his conscience and assuage his inner conflict by destroying the innocence of another person.
Stunning advances
There was a time when Americans knew that homosexuals were not "born that way," but rather, had their normal gender-identity development disturbed and re-directed through early childhood experiences. Not just psychiatrists and psychologists, but average people once recognized on some level that flawed relationships with mothers and fathers could cause girls and boys to grow up with gender confusion.
But that was a time before much of America itself was seduced into believing there is no God, or if there is a God that He is inconsequential to the affairs of men. It was a time when biblical morality inspired the culture and laws of the land.
In the America of another generation, homosexuality was a crime in the eyes of the law and a mortal sin in the eyes of religion. Medicine came to homosexuality's rescue by declaring it, like alcoholism, no longer a crime but, rather, a disease – a pathological behavior.
Decades later, under intense pressure from homosexuals within and without the psychiatric establishment, medicine again saved homosexuality – but this time by declaring it not to be a disease, not abnormal, pathological behavior.
The rapid and stunning ascendancy of homosexuality in the Western World in recent years is, beyond all else, a spiritual barometer of enormous significance. The brilliant public relations campaign homosexual activists have waged over the last several decades is matched in effectiveness only by that of the pro-abortion vanguard a generation ago.
The early titans of the abortion-rights movement determined that the way to win the hearts and minds of Americans was literally to reframe the debate away from the real issue of destroying the unborn, and instead to focus on nonsensical but powerfully compelling emotional catch-phrases like "a woman's right over her body" and "freedom of choice." In the same way, homosexual public relations and marketing professionals, like "After the Ball" authors Marshall Kirk and Hunter Madsen, charted a sophisticated, long-term marketing campaign – eschewing any references to what homosexuals actually do – that would gradually win over the hearts and minds of Americans. They have succeeded, no doubt beyond their wildest expectations.
Today, in every area of life – culture, entertainment, law, the news media, education, even the church – homosexual strides have been nothing less than staggering. In what was once a Judeo-Christian culture, Christians and other proponents of traditional biblical principles are routinely cast as bigots and "homophobes." Meanwhile, homosexuals, once condemned as both corrupted and corrupting, are today honored, idealized, defended as victims and celebrated as heroes and role models.
"Pedophile priests"
But then came the scandal in the Catholic Church.
Even gay journalists' pervasive influence in the mainstream press has not prevented the harsh truth from seeping out – that more than 90 percent of reported offenses of "pedophile priests" don't involve pedophilia at all (adult sexual contact with a pre-pubescent child), but rather, predatory homosexual men preying on young, adolescent boys.
In other words, the public has become aware for the first time that there is a huge problem in the Catholic Church with homosexual men preying on straight teens. This revelation has threatened to set back the gay-rights movement decades, homosexual activist leaders bemoan.
And yet, the Catholic Church situation is just the tip of the iceberg.
For the radioactive truth – threatening to contaminate the carefully cultivated public image of gay normalcy – is that the homosexual activist subculture is profoundly and obsessively fixated on youth. Despite all the dismissive denials of articulate gay spokespeople, the obsession with young males today – as it has always been since ancient times – is central to the homosexual lifestyle.
This does not mean, by any means, that all homosexuals dream of corrupting youth. Such is clearly not the case.
But the homosexual activist movement – the group that is causing homosexual propaganda to be taught in American public schools beginning in kindergarten, and that is setting up school "safe zones" to re-direct children to gay "counselors" – is, indeed, focused on America's youth.
This is nothing new. Before the birth of the Judeo-Christian civilization that produced the greatest abundance of freedom, progress and enlightenment in history, perversion, homosexuality and – yes – child molestation were widespread.
It's all about sex
When all is said and done, homosexuals who go after young, straight boys – whether they are priests or Boy Scout leaders or baseball coaches or whoever – know, consciously or subconsciously, that they may well be putting their young "partner" on the road to homosexuality. They are planting a seed in that fertile ground that has a good chance of taking root and producing more of their kind.
The other reason they are attracted to young, straight people – and this they share with heterosexual child molesters – is that there is a satisfaction for deeply corrupted people in corrupting others. In a bizarre way, it feels like completion, vindication, triumph, victory. It reaffirms the rightness of what they have become, and removes the painful contrast of innocence.
When all is said and done, the destruction of innocence is what homosexual lust for boys is all about.
This has been the secret to their PR success- their need to redefine homosexuality as "gay".
They aren't at all "gay".
Homosexuals are fecal- a far more accurate label which serves to remind all of what it is they actually do.
Don't let them choose the terms of debate. They are fecal. Fecal pride, fecal rights, fecal marriage, fecal sex.
Mr. Atomic Vomit
has a good chance of taking root and producing more of their kind.
It is their strange way of reproducing.
To the liberal mantra "Just because a man is gay doesn't make him a molester" I reply: Just because a man is an alcoholic doesn't make him a drunk driver. (Ah, but the odds...)
Thanks all!
It's not every case, as sexual disorientation is quite a complex phenomenon, but it is quite prevalent. Again, read the drunk driving analogy.
There is not one shred of unfraudulent evidence of a genetic component to homosexuality. There is some possibility of tendency, and relationships with parents can be huge factors in many cases. Many homosexuals have been seduced or raped as children. So, yes there are many possible reasons for this pathology.
And so is illustrated the obsessive-compulsive nature of this "lifestyle".This is what's being taught to school children now under the rubric of tolerance.
All the while 60%-80% perhaps of rank and file homosexuals, including those even in 'movement leadership' would probably seek private and aggressive ways to indulge in treatment to cast off their homosexuality forever. At the end of the day I think they would have to be honest with themselves and choose the way out that would liberate them of all of the darkness and suffering. Just theorizin' here.....
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