Posted on 08/25/2014 7:02:07 PM PDT by Morgana
I am new to this journey. My daughter Faith is only 5 years old. She is mentally and physically disabled, still small enough to carry, quiet . . . mostly, and has not developed the larger, louder, and strange movements and sounds that many older people who are mentally and physically disabled seem to develop as they try to express themselves – yet.
We have taken our daughter to concerts, plays, movie theatres, political speeches, pro-life fundraisers and community events, and spend a lot of time in hallways and lobbies when she does get loud. However, we’ve found that the hardest place to take a child with special needs is to church. We have found the cardinal sin of the Sunday service is not sexual immorality, lying, theft, or heresy – no, it is having distracting movements or loud sounds during worship or the message.
jesismithHe is probably in his early 40’s and he is mentally disabled. Every week his mom brings him faithfully to church. There is a section in the back of the sanctuary where many families sit with their children of all ages with special needs. It is definitely a group that makes a joyful noise during worship and after the offering is taken, they all leave to go to a special class during the sermon. But this week was different. Her son was playing the tambourine that he brought every Sunday to worship God — one of the only ways he expresses praise to God, when a member of the church staff came up to him and asked that he not to use it in service anymore. It was disturbing to other people and it was distracting the band on stage. The mother was crushed, embarrassed, and offended. This is not supposed to be a concert, but worship from all the people, right? She had worked hard all these years to take him — a grown man, which is no small task — out of the sanctuary when loud, and for years, has taught the special needs Sunday school class. She often is unable to join in the worship or listen to the sermon herself, so that her son and others like him can be taught the word of God. Now the one place that both her and her son could join with the church in the praise and worship was not available to her either! Why work so hard to come if even during a loud praise and worship service with everyone singing , keyboards, drums, and guitars he was not able to join in? Was his worship so offending among hundreds of others who may be clapping offbeat or singing off-key that he was asked to stop? So now, put the church on the list of all the places that your special needs child cannot go and participate.
Do not get me wrong: I know children can be a distraction and need to be taken out of the service when loud, whether a crying baby, fidgeting toddler, or even my special needs daughter, but is there never to be a church that gives the mentally and physically disabled enough time or grace to stay in and adjust to a service? Is there no place for the disabled in corporate worship? Must they always be sent out to the lobby alone or to a room to sit alone? Many may not realize they and their parents have probably sacrificed more than most other church members just to show up to church. They probably have spent hours with parents or caregivers getting ready and getting in and out of their vehicle with wheelchairs, walkers, and medical equipment. They have likely spent most of their week in the hospital or battling illness at home, and this may be one of the few Sundays they could even come to church this year. However, they will not spend this Sunday with the body of Christ being ministered to, but out in the hallway in shame.
If the church truly wants to serve the “least of these” – whom Jesus urged the Church to make a priority, are they not the disabled? Now ask yourselves this: How many people with disabilities come to your church? Where are all the people with handicaps anyway? Sure, they seemingly have little to offer the church — no money, no volunteering, no inviting their friends, they may be unlovely to look upon, make weird noises, have improper behaviors, spit more than normal, throw up routinely, and do not even offer “acceptable” praise and worship. Many of them are unwanted even by their own parents. (Over 90% of babies with a disability like our daughters – Trisome 18 / Edwards Syndrome – are aborted.) They are a group who cannot speak for themselves, cannot go where they want to go, or even eat or go to the bathroom without help , and accordingly, they ought to be honored as the most patient among us! The disabled who have been brought to the church are among the blessed few. First, they are blessed to be alive, cared for, and well enough to attend; and second, they are blessed to have a parent or caregiver who love them enough to battle the process of getting them to the church. And so, I implore you — please do not send them out into the lobby or to an empty room to sit alone after all they have struggled with and endured just to make it into your doors!
My final thought for you to ponder is an unfortunate update on the mentally disabled man with the tambourine – he refuses to play it anymore.
LifeNews Note: Jesi Smith and her husband Brad are pro-life speakers with Save The 1, from Rochester Hills, Michigan. They’ve just recently received a personal 1-minute video endorsement from Rick Santorum.
IMO our theology "predicts" the type of place we make for the mentally disabled among us. As a Calvinist, I believe in Total Depravity, which is to say that every single part of a man has been touched by sin. We sin because we are sinners; if we say that someone does not sin, we are saying that they are not a sinner. David says that he had been a sinner even in his mother's womb (Psalm 51:5). IMO there are no "innocents" of any age that have never sinned.
There is no corner of creation that has not fallen. To believe this would mean some have no need of the mercy and forgiveness of Christ. Or, as I argued in my previous post, that to believe so is to pronounce that some have a need but due to their infirmities, they do not need to be told of / cannot respond to the grace and mercy and healing of Christ's blood.
God Bless you!
Try a noisy church. Our praise and worship services are joyously loud. We are just as loud when we thank Jesus as most people our when they cheer their favorite NFL team.
Find a Pentecostal or Charismatic non-denominational church near you. If you can't find one start one.
For your gentle correction, remember it was Jesus who said, “let the children come to me.”
What did I say that you believe is incorrect? How does "let the children come to Me" contradict my previous posts?
In order to bring people to the Lord, you do have to welcome them. It is about welcoming people, even special needs folks.
Because you framed your response as a "gentle correction", what did you read in(to) my posts that you interpreted as specifically "not welcoming" to the special-needs person?
How do I know what?
One of the saddest things I saw in a Catholic church recently was a large room at the back of the main room with a glass enclosure for children. Parents with young children are encouraged to sit in there instead of with the rest of the church. I guess their version of Jesus doesn’t like children or the noise they make. Can’t interrupt the sermon with the noise of one of God’s children.
The stricture of “decorum” can steal goodness and mercy from us if we’re not careful. Does anyone doubt that our Lord Jesus Christ would make a straight path to the “least” among us? Who knows, maybe the least aren’t people with physical disabilities but those torn to pieces in their spirits? He sees, and knows, and will NOT break a bruised reed or extinguish a dimly burning wick!
I knew a big burly man-child at one church I went to that would walk up to you, put his arms around you and say “I love youuuuuu” with a playful growl. I’m not sure if he had Down’s syndrome or what, but I can testify that it was as if God had hugged me in person! Ha!
It seems some people here do not know the Commandment:
3. Remember to keep holy the LORD’S Day.
Staying home and refusing to assemble and share with others — is that what you are talking about?
“One of the saddest things I saw in a Catholic church recently was a large room at the back of the main room with a glass enclosure for children. Parents with young children are encouraged to sit in there instead of with the rest of the church. I guess their version of Jesus doesn’t like children or the noise they make. Can’t interrupt the sermon with the noise of one of God’s children.”
Have you ever tried to hear a sermon over an opera singer? Try several opera singers at once. Yea one starts they all join in. The “cry room” is so the babies can be included and don’t disturb everyone else. “Seen but not heard”.
That as apposed to the Baptist church I grew up in. They had a nursery for the little ones. You prefer that? Not to call out Baptists here but hey most Baptists in fact most churches in general have nurseries for babies these days esp the ***cough cough MEGACHURCHES cough cough***. So you walk into a church and leave your most precious child with ?? in the nursery just because that person is a Christian, so they say. Oh but that is another story.
Yea I’ll take the “cry room”.
Then someone decided the thread needed a slam against non-Catholics.
...sure, bud, sure...if you say so...
FReeper, please!
Why do you think I weaseled in the term “standard?” ;)
That you don’t “need” Church.
As a person who is ASD, I can say they we are able to control ourselves. It just takes effort.
My parents would not take me to church to avoid the problems.
It happened.
Personally, I believe there is a "grace" conferred upon the assembly that is otherwise not conferred.
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