Posted on 12/15/2004 8:04:31 AM PST by B4Ranch
Weapons Of Math Instruction Intercepted At New York Airport
My conservative (I thought) friend K-Squared sent this to my daughter without telling me anything about it. Being the major fan of President Bush that she is, naturally my daughter had to make sure I saw it.
Teacher arrested
At New York's Kennedy airport today, an individual later discovered to be a public school teacher was arrested trying to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square, a slide rule, and a calculator.
At a morning press conference, the U.S. attorney general said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement.
He is being charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.
"Al-gebra is a fearsome cult," the attorney general said. "They desire average solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a search of absolute value. They use secret code names like 'x' and 'y' and refer to themselves as 'unknowns', but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, 'there are 3 sides to every triangle'."
When asked to comment on the arrest, President George W. Bush said, "If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes!!!
:~)
This is a year old, but still funny.
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