Posted on 02/06/2018 9:19:05 AM PST by John Semmens
This week, the 68-year-old son of the late Cuban dictator Fidel Castro committed suicide. Though communism enabled his famous father to amass a billion dollar personal fortune, “Fidelito” was said by friends to have become depressed upon realizing “that Yankee bastard is right. My country is a sh*thole.”
Long-time compadre, Vacio Cabeza professed himself “mystified. He wanted for nothing. We lived like kings. Admittedly, life is kind of tough for the average Cuban, but what does that matter to men like us? Why should we care what Trump said about Cuba?”
Reminded that Trump did not explicitly include Cuba in his complaint about “bringing in so many people from these sh*thole countries,” Cabeza retorted, “we aren’t stupid. Look around you. Why do you think so many Cubans try to paddle their way to America? With Fidelito gone I might have to try the same thing. Who will pick up the tab for me now?”
Fidelito’s uncle and current Cuban dictator Raul Castro is reported to have set up “suicide hotlines to assist fellow comrades who may wish to follow my nephew’s example. Surely, there are others who have even greater reasons for wanting out than our beloved Fidelito.”
Raul lamented that “I partially blame myself for not suppressing Trump’s scurrilous remarks, but then what could I do. It’s not like the old days when we could just execute people who spread capitalist propaganda. There are just too many of them these days. The imperialists have infiltrated fantastical images of the prosperity that exists outside our island paradise and fomented disloyalty everywhere.”
if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...
https://azconservative.org/2018/02/03/opinions-split-on-memo-exposing-fbi-abuses/
Nancy Pelosi blames Bush..................Not clear which one...................
In before, “Lighten up, Francis”...but joking about suicide is never funny.
I love giving President Trump credit for the good things that happen on his watch. Unfortunately, this one is just coincidence - no credit for Trump.
Cute
So does Fidel, Jr. take is daddy’s place getting stupped by Satan?
Cuba isn’t the most faggot-friendly island on the planet. Got to give them props for that.
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