Skip to comments.Brown Vows Revenge on Anti-Sanctuary Cities [semi-satire]
Posted on 04/23/2018 10:19:32 AM PDT by John Semmens
Now that the second largest county in California has joined a growing list of cities opposing the states sanctuary policies, an irate Gov. Jerry Brown (D) has vowed to take vengeance on these lowlifes. The spark provoking this promise came when the San Diego County Board of Supervisors voted to direct the county attorney to file a friend-of-the-court brief supporting the Trump Administrations lawsuit against the states attempt to flout federal immigration laws.
If these people thought theyve had it tough before paying for the medical, education, and welfare needs of our undocumented immigrants, I want them to know that it will get much worse if their elected officials continue to defy me, Brown threatened. Ive already ordered 400 National Guard troops to go to the border and make sure it stays open. We will import the voters needed to ensure that pliable boards and city councils replace recalcitrant GOP-led obstructionists. Resistance is futile. All will be absorbed or exterminated. The choice is theirs. I urge them to choose wisely.
A sign that Brown may have overestimated his mandate to convert California into Norte Mexico came from a most unlikely source this week. The University of California Berkeleys Haas Institute for a Fair and Inclusive Societys poll of California voters found 59% in favor of increased deportations of illegal immigrantsa finding that the Governor characterized as a transient majority that is already on its way to being overturned.
In other California news, Fresno State University President Joseph Castro has awarded Professor Lars Maischak a paid vacation for advocating that President Trump be hanged to save American democracy. Castro explained that while Dr. Maischaks words may seem harsh to the ill-educated constituency that supports Trump, he was only voicing what we all believe to be true. Right-wing rabble rousers are demanding he be punished, but I am convinced that would be unwarranted. Our compromise solution was to put him on paid leave for the remainder of the semester. That way he is out of the classroom, but does not have to suffer any financial setbacks. We stopped short of giving him the raise and promotion that the majority of the faculty would have preferred.
if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...
As always, I wish they would put the foundation of the satire in bold letters. I appreciate the humor and poking fun at the liberals for their insane positions and statements. But today, the insanity is so great, it’s hard to tell which quote is legitimate.
I always find myself having to google the quotes to find the money quote.
The brain to nowhere.
But I’ll go further: they should include an entirely factual version and a purely sarcastic / satirical version every time.
The truth and the truthiness of the matter if you will.
California Gov. Jerry Brown To Ban Sales Of The Bible
Sales of the Holy Bible and Biblical based teaching is set to be banned in California in the near future thanks to Governor Jerry Brown and the state assembly who have combined to force a bill through the state assembly that claims the Bible promotes hate speech against gays, lesbians and transgender people.
To Moonbeam, Asswipe, Psycho-drama Queen, PUNK, Sh*t-for-Brains ......... keep it up.
You have always been a deep pile of crap. Spread yourself on some of those farmlands out there.
These things are landmines worse than the Onion now that the Left is so over the top looney.
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