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University Suspends Student for Gun Ownership [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 9 Dec 2018 | John Semmens

Posted on 12/08/2018 6:25:33 AM PST by John Semmens

The University of North Texas is suspending Brandon Masin, a 25-year-old law student, alleging that he poses a danger. The accusation that led to the suspension was anonymous. Masin presented evidence indicating that witnesses would testify that he could not have been involved in the incident claimed by the unidentified accuser.

University of North Texas Chief of Police Ed Reynolds pointed out that "Masin is the founder of the law school's chapter of The Federalist Society, a notorious right-wing political organization. Thankfully, it is the only right-wing extremist element on campus. On top of this, Mr. Masin admits to owning a gun. Masin's assertion that state law supports this right is technically correct. Nevertheless it raises suspicion and lends credibility to the accusations made against him. Rather than be sorry later, we utilized our authority to suspend him."

Masin can appeal his suspension, but may miss the semester's final exams while waiting for his appeal to be taken up by the University. If he misses taking these exams he could "flunk out" and be dismissed from the law school for academic reasons.

Meanwhile, over at the University of Texas, Austin, liberals at the Counseling and Mental Health Center want masculinity to be designated as a mental illness. Chris Brownson, Associate Vice President for Student Affairs and Director of the Counseling and Mental Health Center says "the notion that a man ought to be a protector and provider for his family is out-dated. In the modern world we have the government to protect and provide for everyone of every gender. Men who can't accept this new paradigm are maladjusted and need to be identified as ill and subjected to treatment to cure them of their delusions."

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...

https://www.freedomsphoenix.com/Opinion/252565-2018-12-07-semi-news-semi-satire-december-9-2018-edition.htm


TOPICS: Education; Humor; Politics; Society
KEYWORDS: educrats; guns; satire; sex
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1 posted on 12/08/2018 6:25:33 AM PST by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

“the notion that a man ought to be a protector and provider for his family is out-dated. In the modern world we have the government to protect and provide for everyone of every gender. Men who can’t accept this new paradigm are maladjusted and need to be identified as ill and subjected to treatment to cure them of their delusions.”

Wow. Not very far from re-education camps now, are we?


2 posted on 12/08/2018 7:25:35 AM PST by Lite
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To: John Semmens

Sorry, just noted that this is satire...


3 posted on 12/08/2018 7:27:57 AM PST by Lite
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To: John Semmens

Y’know, John, some of your stuff is only a beat or 2 before it really happens. This one has a real-life feel to it. I can see this happening.


4 posted on 12/08/2018 8:22:51 AM PST by Tallguy
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To: John Semmens

Accusation equals conviction?

Punishment without trial nor confrontation with accusers?

Fine civics lessons for the students.


5 posted on 12/08/2018 9:32:00 AM PST by fella ("As it was before Noah so shall it be again,")
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To: fella

These are the “new civics” that came with the Obama transformation of our country.


6 posted on 12/08/2018 1:06:32 PM PST by John Semmens
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