Skip to comments.I've Seen Schiff's Hearings before: Monty Python And the Wisdom of Crowds
Posted on 11/20/2019 6:09:12 AM PST by NOBO2012
I have never been a huge fan of Monty Python but I have grudgingly come to admire the timeless genius of silly sketches conceived nearly 50 years ago that still skewer modern culture as freshly as if they were written yesterday. Or perhaps that says more about modern culture still subject to the wisdom of crowds after all these millennia.
Either way, look at this weeks ongoing impeachment investigation and tell me that Monty Python and the Holy Grail didnt capture its essence in this scene titled, appropriately enough, Burn the Witch! No further explanation seems necessary.
VILLAGER #1: We have found a witch, might we burn her?
CROWD: Burn her! Burn!
BEDEVERE: How do you know she is a witch?
VILLAGER #2: She looks like one.
BEDEVERE: Bring her forward.
WITCH: I'm not a witch. I'm not a witch.
BEDEVERE: But you are dressed as one.
WITCH: They dressed me up like this.
CROWD: No, we didn't -- no.
WITCH: And this isn't my nose, it's a false one.
VILLAGER #1: Well, we did do the nose.
BEDEVERE: The nose?
VILLAGER #1: And the hat -- but she is a witch!
CROWD: Burn her! Witch! Witch! Burn her!
BEDEVERE: Did you dress her up like this?
CROWD: No! (no no... no) Yes. (yes yeah) a bit (a bit bit a bit)
VILLAGER #1: But she has got a wart!
BEDEVERE: What makes you think she is a witch?
VILLAGER #3: Well, she turned me into a newt. (pause & look around)
BEDEVERE: A newt!?
VILLAGER #3: Well, I got better.
VILLAGER #2: Burn her anyway!
(king walks in)
BEDEVERE: Quiet! quiet! Quiet! There are ways of telling whether she is a witch.
CROWD: Are there? What are they?
VILLAGER #2: Do they hurt?
[Pay close attention: here comes the logic ]
BEDEVERE: Tell me, what do you do with witches?
VILLAGER #2: Burn!
CROWD: Burn em!. Burn them up!
BEDEVERE: And what do you burn apart from witches?
VILLAGER #1: More witches! (V2 nudge V1)
VILLAGER #2: Wood!
BEDEVERE: So, why do witches burn?
VILLAGER #3: B--... 'cause they're made of wood?
CROWD: Oh yeah, yeah.
BEDEVERE: So, how do we tell whether she is made of wood?
VILLAGER #1: Build a bridge out of her.
BEDEVERE: Ahh, but can you not also make bridges out of stone?
VILLAGER #2: Oh, yeah.
BEDEVERE: Does wood sink in water?
VILLAGER #1: No, no.
VILLAGER #2: It floats! It floats!
VILLAGER #1: Throw her into the bog!
CROWD: The bog!
BEDEVERE: What also floats in water?
VILLAGER #1: Bread!
VILLAGER #2: Apples!
VILLAGER #3: Very small rocks!
VILLAGER #1: Cider!
VILLAGER #2: Grape gravy!
VILLAGER #1: Cherries!
VILLAGER #2: Mud!
VILLAGER #3: Churches -- churches!
VILLAGER #2: Lead -- lead!
KING: A duck.
[all look and stare at king]
BEDEVERE: Exactly! So, logically...
VILLAGER #1: If... she... weighs the same as a duck.. she's made of wood.
BEDEVERE: And therefore?
[pause & think]
VILLAGER #1: A witch!
CROWD: A witch! A witch! A witch!
BEDEVERE: We shall use my largest scales!
[yelling] [push her into scale]
BEDEVERE: Right, remove the stops!
[whop] [creak] wait while scales remains still
CROWD: A witch! A witch!
WITCH: It's a fair cop.
CROWD: Burn her! Burn her!
BEDEVERE: Who are you who are so wise in the ways of science?
KING: I am Arthur
BEDEVERE: My liege!
So, what have we learned? When your facts are wrong, or ignored for the purpose of your argument, you are free to commit all the very best logic fallacies in the world.
Which of course will lead you to a false conclusion, but then, isnt that the point? Weve always known its been nothing more than a witch hunt.
If you wish to watch the original version, its here:
Posted from: MOTUS A.D.
OMG! This is perfect!
cleaning the coffee up
Monty Python knew how to do political satire. Their references were the classics.
One of the bets movies ever.
Actually it’s more like the fight with the black knight (with Schiff in the role) Starts out as a bad ass where none shall pass, fights Arthur and gets his arm chopped off, and Arthur wins! Arthur claims victory, and Schiff says “’Tis a mere flesh wound” Then Arthur fights him again and cuts his other arm off. Again claims victory and Schiff tells him that he’s had worse, cuts off one leg and still comes after him. Arthur cuts off the last leg and the Schiff as a nub says, “Ok, we’ll call it a draw.” Then taunts Arthur to come back and fight him.
That’s how delusional Schiff has become. Every witness he has thrown at Trump has been humiliated and shown to be a worthless DEEP STATE POS. When that doesn’t work, claim a press conference victory and try something else. When that doesn’t work, claim a press conference victory and try something else. When that doesn’t work, claim a press conference victory and try something else......
Monty Python foretold of many liberal mental disorders long before anyone thought they would be possible as mainstream thought.
Now I’m thinking of the scene from Life of Brian, “We are all individuals.”
That scene was 30 years ahead of its time. :)
well done! I was thinking Monte Python myself.
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