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Clapper Says "Spying on Americans Is Routine" [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 17 May 2020 | John Semmens

Posted on 05/18/2020 9:48:11 AM PDT by John Semmens

Former Director of National Intelligence (DNI) James Clapper dismissed the hubbub over revelations that the intelligence community spied on the Trump campaign by asserting "Trump wasn't singled out as some sort of personal vendetta. Spying on Americans is routine. I estimate that more than 100,000 different American citizens were spied on during my tenure at DNI."

"We live in a dangerous world," Clapper reminded. "Enemies abound—both foreign and domestic. Those of us entrusted with defending the government from these enemies must be ever vigilant. Tapping phone lines, bugging residences, secretly video taping people in their homes and work places, blackmail, and any other means of gathering the intelligence needed to keep us safe must be employed."

"President Obama explicitly asked that we keep an eye on Donald Trump," Clapper added. "Here was a guy that had no political pedigree trying to seize power from the men who have invested their careers in public service. His sudden change of career from the private sector to running for president was highly suspicious. His success at it was alarming. We had to do whatever we could to neutralize this threat. The blatant exposure of our covert actions against Trump by current DNI acting-director Richard Grenell is an unprecedented invasion of the privacy that is essential for the intelligence community to be able to do its job."

In related news, Clapper said "I won't be able to honor Senate Judiciary Committee Chairman Lindsey Graham's request that I testify under oath in front of his committee. There's nothing in it for me. When I testify on CNN they provide me with talking points and a paycheck. Unless Lindsey can match that I'm going to have to refuse to testify for him. My excuse will be that until there is a vaccine for COVID-19 it would be too risky for a man my age to leave home. He can watch what I say on CNN and sort through that for evidence."

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...

http://www.gopbriefingroom.com/index.php?topic=402043.0


TOPICS: Conspiracy; Government; Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS: satire; secretpolice; spying; trump

1 posted on 05/18/2020 9:48:11 AM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

I know this is satire but it’s not off the mark from the claim they have made. This years after they said that they do not spy on Americans.


2 posted on 05/18/2020 9:55:38 AM PDT by a fool in paradise (Joe Biden- "First thing I'd do is repeal those Trump tax cuts." (May 4th, 2019))
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To: John Semmens

Other “routine” happenings:

Drunk driving
Home invasions
Robbery
Sexual assault
Bad cheques
Fraud
Illegal entry

Lots of routine stuff.


3 posted on 05/18/2020 11:18:26 AM PDT by JudyinCanada
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To: John Semmens

Shocked! I am shocked, I say.
So is it routine? Or is it essential?
Is it all three?


4 posted on 05/18/2020 2:13:34 PM PDT by Honest Nigerian
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