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Feds Want to Control Auto Speeds [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 26 November 2023 | John Semmens

Posted on 11/24/2023 10:30:59 PM PST by John Semmens

The National Transportation Safety Board (NTSB) wants to install Intelligent Speed Assistance (ISA) in all cars. NTSB chair Jennifer Homendy emphasized that "human error is the chief cause of almost all traffic crashes. The most common error is excessive speed. The weak link in our effort to eliminate this error is expecting drivers to heed posted speed limits. ISA would bypass this weak link."

"With ISA the vehicle's Global Positioning System (GPS) would coordinate with the posted speed limits," she explained. "Ideally, the ISA would absolutely control the vehicle's speed. Should this approach be deemed too intrusive, the ISA could simply record each instance of violation of the limit. Law-enforcement would have access to these records and impose fines or other penalties prescribed by law."

Transportation Secretary Pete Buttigieg called the ISA "a foolproof option for saving lives. By making it impossible for any driver to successfully break the law we will also achieve more of the unity that President Biden has set as the main goal of his administration."

In related news, Buttigieg called Biden's poor polling numbers "an unfairly negative assessment of the President's policies. Too many people have forgotten the dismal state of America he inherited from Trump. First there was the pandemic. Trump's crude lockdown order devastated the economy. His recommendation of unorthodox and ineffective therapies for fighting covid allowed millions to die. Then there was the Trump instigated insurrection against the transfer of power to the man voters elected to replace him. It was President Biden who rescued the economy by adding trillions of dollars of new spending and saved lives by compelling millions to get vaccinations that Trump allowed people to decline. I'm confident that when it comes time to cast a ballot next year the polls we are seeing now will be proven wrong."

If you missed any of the other Semi-News/Semi-Satire posts you can find them at...

https://www.freedomsphoenix.com/Opinion/354304-2023-11-24-semi-news-semi-satire-november-26-2023-edition.htm


TOPICS: Computers/Internet; Government; Humor; Politics; Travel
KEYWORDS: biden; buttigieg; foolproof; safety; satire; surveillance
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To: John Semmens

I drive 5 miles under the limit, in the left lane, with my blinker on.

;)


21 posted on 11/25/2023 6:03:24 AM PST by dynachrome (War does not determine who is right, but who is left.)
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To: Neverlift

Porsche...there is no substitute.
Unless you are a U-Boat commander.


22 posted on 11/25/2023 6:18:36 AM PST by Zathras
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To: John Semmens

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RvV3nn_de2k


23 posted on 11/25/2023 6:33:19 AM PST by LastDayz (A blunt and brazen Texan. I will not be assimilated.)
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To: John Semmens

A number of states already have posted speed limits that are quite shocking to our 15-minute-city-dwelling betters (e.g. 75 and 80 on most Texas interstates), and more red states will raises theirs in response to this diktat. So our brilliant federal planners are soon going to have to go back to imposing national speed limits.


24 posted on 11/25/2023 6:35:10 AM PST by Cincinnatus.45-70 (What do DemocRats enjoy more than a truckload of dead babies? Unloading them with a pitchfork!)
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To: John Semmens

Biden’s doing it because he’s pissed because his pedal car can’t keep up with us.


25 posted on 11/25/2023 7:47:22 AM PST by Vaduz (....)
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To: John Semmens

Pretty good!


26 posted on 11/25/2023 8:40:17 AM PST by MeganC (There is nothing feminine about feminism. )
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To: John Semmens
Transportation Secretary Pete Buttigieg called the ISA "a foolproof option for saving lives. By making it impossible for any driver to successfully break the law we will also achieve more of the unity that President Biden has set as the main goal of his administration."


27 posted on 11/25/2023 9:49:57 AM PST by COBOL2Java ("Life without liberty is like a body without spirit." - Kahlil Gibran)
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To: John Semmens
It may come as a shock to some but cars already keep track of that. I bought a new Toyota Highlander last year and they offered a 90 day free trial of their software package so I was playing around with the app and noticed a friends and family setting that allowed them to drive with features on, so I enabled that feature. The next time my wife went to town it notified me every time she exceeded the speed limit so they already do that. Just because you don't pay for the service doesn't mean those features are not present. Add the radar sensor to the cruise control and I dare you to accelerate when behind a slower car on the freeway. You can not accelerate the car without changing lanes. Also notice they way the lane assistant has control that will turn the car back into a lane if you creep over the white line.

The future is already here just waiting for the government to issue the laws and they will implement those hidden features. I suspect they can update software remotely as well.

28 posted on 11/25/2023 10:52:29 AM PST by itsahoot (Many Republicans are secretly Democrats, no Democrats are secretly Republicans. Dan Bongino.)
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To: Attention Surplus Disorder
So if you’re behind a truck spewing gravel, you just have to follow until your windshield shatters. Have I got that right?

No you just have to manually change lanes, then the radar sensor will have no effect and you can accelerate.

29 posted on 11/25/2023 10:58:08 AM PST by itsahoot (Many Republicans are secretly Democrats, no Democrats are secretly Republicans. Dan Bongino.)
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To: Squawk 8888

Wrong, it is the wrong speed for the driver too incompetent to be driving that speed.

Most drivers are not safe at most any speed, slow reflexes, poor judgement, eyesight, distractions.


30 posted on 11/25/2023 11:52:15 AM PST by doorgunner69 (When tyranny becomes law, rebellion becomes duty)
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To: itsahoot
You are correct that technology is being quietly implemented that can and probably will be used against us. I noted how several police cars with flashes and sirens went through a normally fair-timed intersection. But the lights stayed red for all other lanes but theirs until they'd passed - two cycles of red when they would have changed normally.

Meaning there's now a technological over-ride of the traffic light system available to law enforcement in many places. They already have license-plate scanners that run yours automatically when the police car gets behind you, bringing a plethora of information on you to their in-car display with nary a question about searches or privacy invasion brought up in a court room yet.

Considering these one can better understand how the police have morphed from our protectors to antagonists bringing in government revenue. It's just far easier for them to go along to get along for that sweet retirement package.

Oh...I was pebble sprayed by a big truck the other day. When able to pass I saw on it's side, painted proudly and professionally, "Stone Spitter". I love the Road Warrior movies but don't want to live them.

31 posted on 11/25/2023 2:23:28 PM PST by MikelTackNailer (The Lord Humungus! The Warrior of the Wasteland! The Ayatollah of Rock and Rolla!)
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To: doorgunner69

You’re even more correct than I am, FRiend.


32 posted on 11/25/2023 6:48:35 PM PST by Squawk 8888 (I don't run; if you see me running, you should run too.)
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To: clearcarbon

The only reason I have no plans to try hacking the built-in, out of the factory safeties on my 650cc, >55HP, >800lb two-cylinder 4-stroke Suzuki motorcycle (automatic transmission, leg shields, ABS, heated seats, heated grips, windscreen height adjustable while riding) is that it’s too much like work.

I weigh 120lb at the best of times, so do the math if you must ;-)


33 posted on 11/25/2023 6:55:33 PM PST by Squawk 8888 (I don't run; if you see me running, you should run too.)
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To: frank ballenger

That’s also the storyline for Idiocracy, a Hollywood box office flop nearly a quarter of a century ago! I laughed my ass of when I finally got my hands on a copy!


34 posted on 11/25/2023 6:58:21 PM PST by Squawk 8888 (I don't run; if you see me running, you should run too.)
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To: Clutch Martin

Here in Ontario, Canada the penalties under our no-fault insurance as of before your accident are as follows, in no particular order, and incomplete, in layman’s terms:

1. Criminal: Indictable (choice of judge or judge + jury): At least a couple of months incarceration, included as the minimum 2 yeas under supervision (parole); *OR*

A summary conviction, trial by Judge alone, that can involve as little as an Absolute Discharge and no Public Record of conviction. Fighting it without a plea all but guarantees probation for up to two years less a day.

2. Insurance: The driver will be effectively uninsurable because the next consequence is that a year’s insurance will cost more than buying a good used car and paying with cash.

3. Ontario Highway Traffic Act: A lifetime licence suspension, with “lifetime” defined as “until the driver smartens up”.

And that, FRiend, is just a few reasons that driving in America, until established otherwise, will always be considered dangerous to everyone *except* those anyone who thinks he “knows” that America’s roads are the safest in the world.


35 posted on 11/25/2023 7:18:56 PM PST by Squawk 8888 (I don't run; if you see me running, you should run too.)
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To: TermLimits4All

Your family alone is motivation enough, but you knew that already FRiend.


36 posted on 11/25/2023 7:20:51 PM PST by Squawk 8888 (I don't run; if you see me running, you should run too.)
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To: dynachrome

Protip: Every speedometer I’ve ever compared to Google Maps or the free android GPS Test app, consistently reads 55MPH when your actual speed is 50MPH, regardless of whether the scale is metric-only (my bike) or dual-scale (every production car in America for nearly half a century, now hidden because it’s driver-selectable).

Comclusion: If you think you’re driving 5MPH below the posted 55MPH limit, I am confident that your actual speed is between 44 and 45MPH.

Your mileage may vary.


37 posted on 11/25/2023 7:30:02 PM PST by Squawk 8888 (I don't run; if you see me running, you should run too.)
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To: Attention Surplus Disorder

It means you’re tailgating by any standard.


38 posted on 11/25/2023 7:30:47 PM PST by Squawk 8888 (I don't run; if you see me running, you should run too.)
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To: dynachrome

Moi aussi ;-)


39 posted on 11/25/2023 7:31:12 PM PST by Squawk 8888 (I don't run; if you see me running, you should run too.)
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To: Cincinnatus.45-70

My bike has a rated top speed of 200km/h out of the factory. My comfort zone maxes out at 150km.h indicated (~135km/h actual) where it was Sunday, on a clear summer day, less than a couple of hours north of Toronto. The road is posted at 120km/h. It doesn’t take much simple arithmetic to figure out that most American Interstates I’m the slowest thing on the freeway. I “Get Away With It”) by obeying the one universal law that most drivers obey outside populations: Drive in the driving lane and only pass in the passing lane.

In Military and Motorcycle dialects of the King’s English:

Lead, Follow, or Get out of the Way!!!!!!


40 posted on 11/25/2023 7:43:05 PM PST by Squawk 8888 (I don't run; if you see me running, you should run too.)
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