COVID Shots Trigger Child Seizures [semi-satire]

Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 31 March 2024 | John Semmens

[John Semmens]

During the COVID pandemic young children were acknowledged "to have a statistically insignificant risk of severe illness or death from COVID." Despite the low risk for this population cohort, the United States Food and Drug Administration (FDA) still urged parents to have their young children be injected with the mRNA vaccine. Observations following these injections showed that "the incidence of febrile seizures was significantly elevated."

Evidence linking the shots to seizures did not change the FDA's recommendation that young children receive the vaccine. An FDA spokesman explained that "a lot of money has been invested in these vaccines by both the pharmaceutical industry and the government. Rather than let the remaining doses of this miracle product go to waste and create bad publicity that could turn public opinion against us, simply ensuring that all stocks are fully utilized averts unwanted attention."

"Since the World Health Organization (WHO) is predicting the emergence of more pandemics, it is crucial that the experience with COVID be made to appear as successful as possible," the spokesman added. "Health authorities around the world need this appearance of success to generate confidence and compliance with future lockdown orders and vaccination mandates. Given this scenario, the small additional risk to a fraction of our youngest children is deemed tolerable."

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[Tell It Right]

Very troubling