Posted on 06/21/2007 12:09:44 PM PDT by Mr. Brightside
GREEDY COUPLE CASHES IN AFTER THEIR WEDDING SHOWER
By Abigail Van Buren
Mon Jun 18, 7:57 PM ET
DEAR ABBY: My husband and I have been invited to the wedding of some casual friends, "Ron" and "Barbie." We sent in our RSVP accepting the invitation, but already we're dreading the day. You see, a few weeks after we mailed it, we had dinner with them.
During the dinner, Ron and Barbie blatantly informed us that they had registered for expensive shower items (I had attended the shower) so they could return the gifts for cash. During the conversation, I mentioned I'd had my eye on a pricey vacuum cleaner I had seen advertised on TV. Barbie turned to her fiance and said, "Honey, we should have registered for that so we could return it for the cash!"
I was floored. So was my husband, though neither of us said a word until we were well on our way home and away from the "happy couple."
If that wasn't enough, they were complaining about some blue towels they had received that they had not registered for. Barbie said they hated them and had returned them. Want to guess what my shower gift was? The blue towels, of course. I couldn't believe she was saying this to us!
My husband was so disgusted he quietly excused himself from attending the bachelor party. Now he no longer even wants to go to the wedding -- let alone give them another gift. He says they make him sick. But we already sent in the card saying that we'll be attending. I agree with my husband on this. The only thing holding us back is the etiquette issue of being a "no-show." Otherwise, I couldn't give a rip about those people. What to do? -- SPEECHLESS IN MICHIGAN
DEAR SPEECHLESS: After the performance you witnessed, no one can blame you for feeling as you do. Your breach of etiquette would not be in skipping the fund-raiser (oops! wedding); it would be to do so without first informing the couple and having them go to the expense of ordering food and drinks for you. They should be notified immediately, in a short note, that "your plans have changed, and you are not able to attend." This will get you off the hook without being rude to a couple you really don't care to associate with in the future anyway.
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Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
Elaine: Boy, I am really starting to dislike the Drake!
Jerry: I hate the Drake! Maybe the whole thing was a scam. Anybody can just get engaged and get presents and just keep them all. Maybe they’re on their way to Chicago tomorrow and do the whole thing all over again.
I have to admit that my brother who I love to death is like this. Not the return bit, but registering at the highest price place they could think of just because for their wedding. Their baby shower registry had a Pierre Cardin (sp)crib and clothes. We gave them the “paranoid” stuff like plug covers, cabinet locks etc. that are more important. But, it burned my hide when I saw the list as they are both successful lawyers in their 30s.
LOL!
I’m glad Dear Abby is available to answer these questions. Imagine - sending a note saying you can’t attend. What mortal could have ever thought of that?
One way to prevent the recipient of a gift from returning it for cash is to have whatever you give them monogrammed.
I’m thinkin’ they should be stiffed for the couple’s dinner. After, they can send a note—”So sorry we couldn’t attend your wedding, something suddenly came up!”
You know, the excuse that Marcia Brady got from the hunky quarterback when she broke her nose? ;^)
It word serve the brats right if more of their guests did that. And even if you did the things that Ron and Barbie did, would you ever brag about it—especially to people you have invited? Classy. Really classy.
As Polk said to Scarlett in Gone With The Wind, “Asking ain’t gettin!” People can register for all the high dollar goodies they like, but it doesn’t mean anyone is going to spring for them.
Target has gift cards. Good for all occasions.
Well gosh, it's nothing to get that crazy about...
I hate to defend your relatives to you, but people who are rich tend to want nice things, and therefore may have registered for name-brand expensive items NOT because they need charity, but because they have no desire to be surrounded with items purchased at Target or Walmart.
I like people like this because they tend to give away good stuff to thrift stores where I can buy it really cheap.
People who find it addictive to read true stories about the horrible manners of others- would enjoy the Etiquette hell forum.
http://www.etiquettehell.com/smf/index.php
Reading about the bridezillas here is akin to being unable to look away from a train wreck - which is what our society is rapidly becoming in terms of manners and taste.
L
They are not rich by my definition, just too cheap to buy these things themselves. He is so tight it is not funny.
I also don't like how ritualistic showers and weddings have become. You must do everything just so, or else you are not really married, I guess. Even if you've been living with the guy for the last three years, you must have all the little wedding trinkets of accomplishment. Even the coolest, hippest women become robotic slaves of the wedding industry. Their big chance to have it all.
I remember a friend's wedding before the wedding and shower rituals became established. She put all her gifts out on a big table. There were bizarre items. There were ugly items. There were three-of-a-kinds. It was fun. She didn't need the usual china and silver and crystal, and also understood what "gift" meant.
And what is the deal with the endless showers? Lingerie showers, stock the bar showers....WTF? We just got married and called it good. Small service outside with family and a very few friends in attendance. Then food and good cheer.
Well gosh, it's nothing to get that crazy about...
Are you kidding? And miss all the strippers?
Make that crazy, psycho strippers!
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