One-third of office romances end in unemployment

NY Post ^ | February 8, 2018 | Jacob Passy

[C19fan]

Many companies may not ban it, but workers still have plenty of reason to avoid an office romance like the plague.

One in three romantic office relationships will end in at least one person being fired, according to a survey of 150 human resources executives conducted by hiring firm Challenger, Gray and Christmas. Things aren’t necessarily better for those who don’t get fired. The survey found that 17 percent of employers chose to move at least one employee to a different department, and 5 percent of these affairs led to litigation.

[Texas Fossil]

Congratulations.

Next month will be 47 for my wife and I.

We met in the last semester of college, married a year later. Morning after our first date, I went with her to teach her Sunday School class.

We both knew within 2 weeks that we would marry.

I spent 35 years in hardlines distribution business. 30 of that in outside sales/management of some fashion.

You have all read about traveling salesmen? smile. Our life was pretty simple and we’re still together.

[RightGeek]

I had never heard of this or seen it before, but supposedly it is fairly common. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Work_spouse

[nickedknack]

A somewhat related story: My ship, CV-63 USS Kitty Hawk, made a port call to Perth/Freemantle in Western Australia. Six marriages among the officers of my squadron (27 officers total) resulted from that one week visit.

[buckalfa]

Same as you, our office romance has lasted 40 years, but it cost her her job and blocked me from advancement. I would not change anything, but would not recommend the practice for anybody now in this #MeToo day and age.

[Joe 6-pack]

"More information is needed."

There are a lot of variables at play. I suspect the outcomes vary widely between the stripper who marries a bouncer at her workplace vs. the two Catholic middle school teachers who met at their workplace.

[chesley]

Congratulations to you too. Nothing is more conducive to happiness than having a good wife. Or husband if you’re the wife.

[certrtwngnut]

Met my wife in 1958 when we were both employed at Kresges Dept. Store in Newark, N.J.. We married in April of 1962 and are still married. 56 Very good years.

[OrangeHoof]

Knew a fairly normal guy who fell in love and began living with one of these chicks that was goth before goth was cool.Everyday was Halloween for this chick. I got transfered into IT along with this guy and a month later, he stops showing up for work. Cold turkey. No explanation.

Afull two months later he calls our boss and says that he had a falling out with Ms. Spooky and she threatened to have him killed. And her look said she meant it.

So he had driven home to his parents in Nebraska and then enlisted in the Coast Guard just to get out of her access zone.

That’s a very dramatic example but, yeah, office romances that turn bad also result in job changes.

[PapaBear3625]

I met my wife at work. But that was over 30 years ago, and was a different era.

[Skooz]

I had never heard of this or seen it before, but supposedly it is fairly common. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Work_spouse

Yep. I'm on work wife #3.

#1 was promoted and is now my boss. We're still friends.

#2 married for real and moved to another city. We're still very close.

#3 is far less intense a relationship than the first two. Very cordial and friendly. We're cubemates and get along exceptionally well.

Makes the work day less dreary.

[Pearls Before Swine]

What went on outside the office remained outside of the office.

That's the key. It doesn't always work that way.

[luckystarmom]

I met my hubby at work. Lots of our friends also met and married at the same company. We’ve all be married over 20 years.

The ones that didn’t last as long were from spouses dying.

I miss working there. The company got bought out.

[luckystarmom]

I dated several guys from work before I met my hubby.

I was meeting more nice guys at work.

The guys at church never asked the girls out. None of the women from my Bible Study were getting asked out.

[equaviator]

Fools in love
Well, are there any other kind of lovers?
Fools in love
Is there any other kind of pain?
Everything you do, everywhere you go now
Everything you touch, everything you feel
Everything you see, everything you know now
Everything you do, you do it for your lady love
Your lady love, your lady love, your lady love
Fools in love
Are there any creatures more pathetic?
Fools in love
Never knowing when they’ve lost the game
Everything you do, everywhere you go now
Everything you touch, everything you feel
Everything you see, everything you know now
Everything you do, you do it for your lady love
Your lady love, your lady love, your lady love
Fools in love they think they’re heroes
Cause they get to feel more pain
I say fools in love are zeros
I should know
I should know because this fool’s in love again
Fools in love
Gently hold each other hands forever
Fools in love
Gently tear each other limb from limb
Everything you do, everywhere you go now
Everything you touch, everything you feel
Everything you do, even your rock ‘n’ roll now
Nothing mean a thing except you and your lady love
Your lady love, your lady love, your lady love
Fools in love they think they’re heroes
Cause they get to feel more pain
I say fools in love are zeros
I should know
I should know because this fool’s in love again
Fools in love they think they’re heroes
Cause they get to feel more pain
I say fools in love are zeros
I should know
I should know because this fool’s in love again

[luckystarmom]

Our office was around 2000 people. I dated guys in other departments. I then avoided them when we broke up.

The guys I dated also married other girls from the same company. There were lots of young adults in their 20s working together.

My hubby was the best friend of another engineer I was working with. He was such a nice married guy. I asked him if he had a single brother. A short while later his best friend got hired. Didn’t marry his brother, but did marry his best friend. He was the best man at my wedding too.

[outofsalt]

I work in a hospital where nurses and doctors “practice” their trades.
A surgeon I know says, “Most problems in neurosurgery can be avoided by sleeping with your own wife.”
Lot’s of transfers happen quietly.

[redfreedom]

I’ve known a couple women like that. One had to have every guy in the company, like it was a hobby or something.

Another told the other guys wife after it was over, which created a couple divorces.

The risks (the ruin a divorce creates) vs the reward (a few minutes of fun) makes the office romance just plain stupid.

[BillyBonebrake]

Don’t dip the pen in company ink.

[Wuli]

First I need to nitpick. What the authors mean by “unemployment” and what we usually think of as unemployment should be clarified.

For myself, I do not think of merely being fired, or leaving a job voluntarily as “unemployment”. I only think of it as unemployed when a change of jobs has a break and no other job is obtained before the person has to, for financial reasons, start taking their state’s unemployment benefits.

It may be nitpicking to some, but my own personal observations of incidences of “office romances”, that resulted in one person leaving the company, always observed the person who left readily got another job if they did not already have one lined up. So, I am leery of accepting the “unemployment” angle. I think they should have kept it the simple act of one of the two persons “had to leave the company”, without the “unemployment” connotation.

On the general issue of office romances, I think they seldom are a healthy thing for the persons directly involved or the work environment for themselves and the others they work with. I think it is best for all concerned, including the romantic couple, if one of the two persons leaves the company. Why? The relationship risks putting ethical questions on office performance judgements as viewed by the pair and by their co-workers - was an office performance, promotion or demotion judgement call affected by the relationship or superiors knowledge of the relationship? The risk and it’s question is there, whether or not there is anything to it. It’s bad for the overall work environment, unless you’re running a Peyton Place department or company to start with.

I consulted in a company that had many marriages within quite a number of the top managers. Those who were close to either side of those marriages, outside the office, felt secure. Those that didn’t felt like insecure outsiders and that their work and promotions were hindered by not being in with the “in” crowd - many senior management couples that also were very much friends with each other.

[Georgia Girl 2]

There is nothing wrong with two single people who work together dating. When one or both are married that’s when the problems start.