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Police Use Stun Gun On Man Attempting To Have Sex With Car [KS]
CBS Chicago ^ | May 3, 2018 at 12:54 pm | Staff

Posted on 05/03/2018 1:19:17 PM PDT by Red Badger

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To: ameribbean expat

How do we know that the car wasn’t consenting?.............


41 posted on 05/03/2018 1:39:41 PM PDT by Red Badger (Remember all the great work Obama did for the black community?.............. Me neither.)
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To: vrwconspiracist
I was thinking along the lines of...

Queen - I'm In Love With My Car

42 posted on 05/03/2018 1:39:50 PM PDT by kaboom
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To: Ciaphas Cain

It didn’t blow up................


43 posted on 05/03/2018 1:39:59 PM PDT by Red Badger (Remember all the great work Obama did for the black community?.............. Me neither.)
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To: NorthMountain

“If he was trying to do a bus or a subway train, he’d be a metrosexual.”

I bow before your awesomeness!!! (-:


44 posted on 05/03/2018 1:40:04 PM PDT by MeganC (There is nothing feminine about feminism.)
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To: Red Badger

Was Obama in Chicago at the time? I understand he likes the tailpipe.


45 posted on 05/03/2018 1:40:05 PM PDT by Dr. Thorne
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To: Dr. Thorne

Chicago = Kansas


46 posted on 05/03/2018 1:40:59 PM PDT by Dr. Thorne
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To: Red Badger
We were called to the 1200 block of East Broadway to a report of a naked male underneath a car,”

So the car was on top.

47 posted on 05/03/2018 1:41:20 PM PDT by FreeReign
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To: vrwconspiracist

I’m in Love With My Car

Queen

Oh
The machine of a dream, such a clean machine
With the pistons a pumpin’, and the hubcaps all gleam
When I’m holding your wheel
All I hear is your gear
With my hand on your grease gun
Mmm, it’s like a disease, son
I’m in love with my car, gotta feel for my automobile
Get a grip on my boy racer roll bar
Such a thrill when your radials squeal

Told my girl I’ll have to forget her
Rather buy me a new carburetor
So she made tracks saying this is the end, now
Cars don’t talk back they’re just four wheeled friends now

When I’m holding your wheel
All I hear is your gear
When I’m cruisin’ in overdrive
Don’t have to listen to no run of the mill talk jive

I’m in love with my car (love with my car), gotta feel for my automobile
I’m in love with my car (love with my car), string back gloves in my automolove


48 posted on 05/03/2018 1:41:36 PM PDT by Responsibility2nd
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To: Red Badger

That’s almost plausible. (I’ve made that drive, too. I think I was awake ...)


49 posted on 05/03/2018 1:41:38 PM PDT by NorthMountain (... the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed)
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To: Red Badger

Was it a Chevro-Lay?
Or a VW Bug?


50 posted on 05/03/2018 1:41:48 PM PDT by bunkerhill7 ((((("The Second Amendment has no limits on firepower"-NY State Senator Kathleen A. Marchione.")))))))
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To: Red Badger
Uh, that's not a banana...


51 posted on 05/03/2018 1:42:48 PM PDT by Yo-Yo (Is the /sarc tag really necessary?)
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To: Red Badger

Sex with cars should take place IN A GARAGE. We don’t want to see machine sex on the streets.


52 posted on 05/03/2018 1:43:01 PM PDT by Yaelle
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To: WayneS

“...just start the car...”

BINGO


53 posted on 05/03/2018 1:43:37 PM PDT by budj (combat vet, 2nd of 3 generations)
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To: bunkerhill7

“...VW Bug...”

or VW Bugger


54 posted on 05/03/2018 1:44:19 PM PDT by budj (combat vet, 2nd of 3 generations)
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To: Yo-Yo

LOL!...................


55 posted on 05/03/2018 1:44:39 PM PDT by Red Badger (Remember all the great work Obama did for the black community?.............. Me neither.)
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To: MeganC
Thankyou, thankyou, thankyou ...

Seriously: First time I saw that term, I thought it referred to somebody with a fetish for romance on subway trains, like the underground equivalent of the "Hile High Club". Regrettably, I was wrong ...

Again, seriously: When I first saw the headline "Paris Hilton Sex Scandal", I thought it referred to unsavory goings-on at a hotel in France. Regrettably, I was wrong ...

56 posted on 05/03/2018 1:45:19 PM PDT by NorthMountain (... the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed)
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To: Dilbert San Diego

Car Salesman: Really officer, all I told the guy was get inside this baby and see how good it feels.


57 posted on 05/03/2018 1:45:40 PM PDT by LeoTDB69
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To: Red Badger

Is the car’s name Christine?

Seriously, though. Maybe he can hook up with that dumb broad who was having sex with trees a couple of months ago.


58 posted on 05/03/2018 1:45:53 PM PDT by Pravious
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To: Red Badger
I know Gary Larson said that this wasn't what you think it is, but damn!


59 posted on 05/03/2018 1:47:07 PM PDT by dfwgator (Endut! Hoch Hech!)
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To: Red Badger

Was the car’s engine running? He may have got hotter sex than he was expecting.


60 posted on 05/03/2018 1:47:29 PM PDT by jonrick46 (Trump continues to have all the right enemies.)
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