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As Justice Kennedy Retires, Nation Takes Moment To Thank God Hillary Clinton Not President-Satire
Babylon Bee ^ | 6/27/18 | Staff

Posted on 06/27/2018 1:58:24 PM PDT by fungoking

As Justice Kennedy Retires, Nation Takes Moment To Thank God Hillary Clinton

U.S.—After Justice Kennedy announced his retirement Wednesday, the nation took a brief moment to thank the Lord that Hillary Clinton lost the 2016 election, and thus would not be able to select his replacement for the Supreme Court.

The nation acknowledged that it didn’t deserve God’s blessings but thanked Him anyway for sparing them a Clinton presidency.

“Father God, we just want to thank You that Hillary Clinton didn’t win the presidency. We know, Lord, that Trump isn’t ideal either, but hoo boy. That was a close one,” one man said in a special emergency prayer and thanksgiving service held at his church in Kentucky. “You truly are wise and sovereign.”

The nation’s “Never Trump” movement reportedly remained steadfast in its opposition to the president, still being troubled by his policies and lack of moral character, but silently thanked God anyway that “at least that crazy woman didn’t win.”


TOPICS: Humor; Society
KEYWORDS: politics; satire
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1 posted on 06/27/2018 1:58:24 PM PDT by fungoking
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To: fungoking

Her election would have made the court 5-4 liberal at the beginning. 6-3 liberal with Kennedy’s replacement, with a good likelihood of replacing Ginsberg with a younger liberal judge (even if it meant more Arkancide).


2 posted on 06/27/2018 1:59:59 PM PDT by CatOwner
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To: fungoking

“Father God, we just want to thank You that Hillary Clinton didn’t win the presidency. We know, Lord, that Trump isn’t ideal either, but hoo boy...”

...as for the last part of this...I beg to differ. Bonehead!


3 posted on 06/27/2018 2:00:36 PM PDT by albie
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To: fungoking

I know Babylon Bee is always joking with us.

But there’s some seriousness here too.

If Hillary had won, either Merrick Garland or a more liberal justice would be on the Supreme Court, instead of Gorsuch. The recent cases would have been decided 5-4 in the other direction.

And today,a President Hillary would have her chance to tilt the Supreme Court in a decidedly liberal direction.

Food for thought.

I thank God about lots of things. Not always election results, but I think I do pray that things worked out in a good way in November 2016.


4 posted on 06/27/2018 2:01:29 PM PDT by Dilbert San Diego
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To: fungoking

With Hitlery we didn’t dodge a bullet, we dodged a MOAB.


5 posted on 06/27/2018 2:01:45 PM PDT by laplata (Liberals/Progressives have diseased minds.)
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To: fungoking

That’s not satire. We are on our knees thanking God for a Trump win.


6 posted on 06/27/2018 2:02:34 PM PDT by Jonty30 (What Islam and secularism have in common is that they are both death by cults.)
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To: albie

I’m no Biblical scholar, but, have often heard that God has used seriously imperfect men towards His will.

And so it could well be with Donald Trump.

Any more Biblically knowledgeable, I hope they will educate us all. This reminds me too, how some liberal types wonder, how evangelicals can support Trump, given his life, and adultery and all that.


7 posted on 06/27/2018 2:03:25 PM PDT by Dilbert San Diego
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To: fungoking

This is how John McStain gets sweet little Cindy into that sweet little Senate seat and vote with the Dems


8 posted on 06/27/2018 2:04:24 PM PDT by Ponyexpress9790
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To: albie

We thank you Lord, from saving us from satan!


9 posted on 06/27/2018 2:04:51 PM PDT by notaliberal (St. Michael the Archangel, defend us in battle,)
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To: fungoking

Not satire......................


10 posted on 06/27/2018 2:09:09 PM PDT by Red Badger (When Obama and VJ go to prison for treason, will Roseanne get her show back?...)
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To: notaliberal

Every single day. The thank you is never ending. HRC shouldn’t even be in charge of a cell block, just in one.


11 posted on 06/27/2018 2:10:33 PM PDT by Equine1952 (Get yourself a ticket on a common mans train of thought.)
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To: Dilbert San Diego

Hillary’s pick would have been much, much worse than Garland!

Garland was what Dems consider a moderate, and he was already in his 60s when nominated.

Dems actually thought that, at his age when he wouldn’t be long on the SC, and that his ‘moderation’ would combine to allow his Senate confirmation.

Grassley said “No” and even dared McConnell to overrule him if McConnell wanted to consider Garland.


12 posted on 06/27/2018 2:11:58 PM PDT by jjotto (Next week, BOOM! for sure!)
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To: jjotto

Good point. Hillary could have pulled the Garland nomination, and replaced with a Wise Latina mini-me.

If that had happened, all these decisions this week would have been 5-4 the other way.

And now with the swing vote Kennedy retiring, a Hillary nominee would have consolidated the liberal bloc on the court.

In fact, if Hillary had won, Ruth Bader Ginsburg probably would have retired, and been replaced by a much younger radical.

Elections do have their consequences.


13 posted on 06/27/2018 2:14:48 PM PDT by Dilbert San Diego
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To: fungoking

Not satire in my mind!


14 posted on 06/27/2018 2:16:04 PM PDT by Gamecock (In church today, we so often find we meet only the same old world, not Christ and His Kingdom. AS)
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To: fungoking; All

Some of the liberal reactions on twitter and other places have been just INSANE. I haven’t even made it over to KOS yet, not sure I can handle that much salty tears and infantile rage.

This is from Reddit.

“Game over. The American idea — that all people, regardless of skin color, gender, sexuality, religion, nationality, etc are equal — which we fought a bloody civil war over and waged a world war to defend, is dead. And rather than going out with a bang, our death blow is coming from a failed steak salesman turned reality TV star turned fascist politician named Drumpf. I am literally hyperventilating with rage.”

“Robert Mueller, if you could go ahead and speed up your investigating a little... some indictments or recommendations for indictment sure would help. Can’t have a president appoint a justice with impeachment proceedings looming.”

“Locking up kids in cages and people think they are “making America great again”, what a joke. We’re no better than the nazis at this point”


15 posted on 06/27/2018 2:19:28 PM PDT by tcrlaf (They told me it could never happen in America. And then it did....)
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To: Dilbert San Diego; SamAdams76
We should get on our knees EVERY DAY and Thank God this didn't become a reality, or as SamAdams76 put it perfectly:

The morning of November 9, I felt like I had a fatal disease that suddenly went into remission.


16 posted on 06/27/2018 2:20:21 PM PDT by DoodleBob
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To: Dilbert San Diego
"I’m no Biblical scholar, but, have often heard that God
has used seriously imperfect men towards His will."

Of course he does. The Bible is replete with instances of
God using imperfect, sinful men to carry out his will.
From the patriarchs of the Old Testament to the Apostles of
the new Testament, all were imperfect men.

17 posted on 06/27/2018 2:23:45 PM PDT by StormEye
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To: fungoking

I dunno; I think President Trump is an ideal President with stellar backbone. A real man. Something we haven’t seen since the Reagan Admin.


18 posted on 06/27/2018 2:33:02 PM PDT by Boomer (Leftism is the Mental/Moral Equivalent of End Stage Cancer)
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To: albie

As if The Almighty didn’t KNOW EXACTLY how Trump would perform as POTUS. God not only KNEW, He hand-picked Donald John Trump to turn America back toward her Founding Principles. Trump is God’s “King Cyrus” for these Last Days before Christ returns. All is well.


19 posted on 06/27/2018 2:38:35 PM PDT by Tucker39 ("It is impossible to rightly govern a nation without God and the Bible." George Washington)
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To: fungoking

Not satire - I did thank God today.


20 posted on 06/27/2018 2:56:57 PM PDT by tje
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