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Golf is a Funny Game
email from a friend | 3/19/2019 | unknown

Posted on 03/19/2019 8:05:32 AM PDT by sodpoodle

A man, while playing on the front nine of a complicated golf course, became confused as to where he was on the course. Looking around, he saw a lady playing ahead of him. He walked up to her, explained his confusion and asked her if she knew what hole he was playing She replied, "I'm on the 7th hole, and you are a hole behind me, so you must be on the 6th hole." He thanked her and went back to his golf.

On the back nine the same thing happened; and he approached her again with the same request. She said, "I'm on the 14th hole, you are a hole behind me, so you must be on the 13th hole." Once again he thanked her and returned to his play.

He finished his round and went to the clubhouse where he saw the same lady sitting at the end of the bar. He asked the bartender if he knew the lady. The bartender said that she was a sales lady and played the course often.

He approached her and said, "Let me buy you a drink in appreciation for your help. I understand that you are in the sales profession. I'm in sales, also. What do you sell?"

She replied, "If I tell you, you'll laugh."

"No, I won't."

"Well, if you must know," she answered, "I work for Tampax."

With that, he laughed so hard he almost lost his breath.

She said, "See, I knew you would laugh."

"That's not what I'm laughing at," he replied. "I'm a salesman for Preparation H, so I'm still a hole behind you!"


TOPICS: Hobbies; Humor; Sports
KEYWORDS: smile
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To: Moonman62

That’s the one! Thank you for the link. That was hilarious. Nothing like it on the tube anymore.

And it reminded me, the answer to the age old question “Ginger or Maryann” is Ellie Mae.


41 posted on 03/19/2019 9:40:31 AM PDT by NonValueAdded (#DeplorableMe #BitterClinger #HillNO! #cishet #MyPresident #MAGA #Winning #covfefe #BuildIt)
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To: JoeFromSidney

Any chance you grew up in Brooklyn? There were kids who did that at Dyker Beach Golf Club.


42 posted on 03/19/2019 9:40:37 AM PDT by wbarmy (I chose to be a sheepdog once I saw what happens to the sheep.)
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To: FatherofFive

I take offense at that joke. I have spent two hours looking for a G spot. And if my wife ever finds out she will kill me.


43 posted on 03/19/2019 9:42:30 AM PDT by wbarmy (I chose to be a sheepdog once I saw what happens to the sheep.)
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To: N. Theknow

OWWWWwwwwww!


44 posted on 03/19/2019 9:49:34 AM PDT by HeadOn ([ Insert tagline here - I got nothin'.])
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To: oh8eleven

A golf course: the waste of a perfectly good rifle range.


45 posted on 03/19/2019 9:52:42 AM PDT by cyclotic ( Democrats must be politically eviscerated, disemboweled and demolished.)
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To: JBW1949

Badabing!


46 posted on 03/19/2019 9:55:01 AM PDT by aquila48
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To: sodpoodle

GOLF - Gentlemen Only Ladies Forbidden.


47 posted on 03/19/2019 9:59:23 AM PDT by Phlap (REDNECK@LIBARTS.EDU)
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To: wbarmy
Nope. Warren, Ohio.
48 posted on 03/19/2019 10:28:01 AM PDT by JoeFromSidney (Colonel (Retired) USAF.)
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To: sodpoodle
Guy comes home from the club at 11:00, soaked with sweat, grey faced.
His wife says, "Where the hell have you been? It's dark, you're 5 hours late!"
The guy holds up his hand to stop her. "It was horrible! Middle of the 3rd hole, Harry has a heart attack! Drops dead, right on the fairway!"
"Yeah, so?"
"The rest of the day, it was hit the ball, drag Harry, hit the ball, drag Harry..."
49 posted on 03/19/2019 10:39:18 AM PDT by jonascord (First rule of the Dunning-Kruger Club is that you do not know you are in the Dunning-Kruger club.)
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To: READINABLUESTATE

LOL


50 posted on 03/19/2019 10:52:22 AM PDT by Sergio (An object at rest cannot be stopped! - The Evil Midnight Bomber What Bombs at Midnight)
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To: oh8eleven
".... Golf - a good walk ruined by chasing a little white ball...."

Golf - a pleasant walk in the park.

51 posted on 03/19/2019 11:12:34 AM PDT by HotHunt (Climate change is not an "inconvenient truth" but many convenient lies.)
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To: Rummyfan

Hey Rummyfan...I just now saw your joke about the husband and wife...That’s a good one...I’ll have to remember that one...Thanks...


52 posted on 03/19/2019 2:26:19 PM PDT by JBW1949 (I'm really PC....PATRIOTICALLY CORRECT!!!!)
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To: sodpoodle

Bob and Fred were best of friends and retirees. the only time Bob was happy was just before, during , and after playing golf.

One afternoon Bob was hanging around the house and annoying his wife. Finally in frustration his wife say Bob just go call Freed and play some golf. This cheered Bob up immediately and he left the house to play golf with Fred.

Many hours later, late into the evening, Bob comes home, being his normal grumpy self. His wife asks where have you been? Didn’t you play golf with Fred?

Bob answers, yes we played golf, but Fred dropped dead of a heart attack on the 3rd tee. The wife responds Oh my that is terrible. Bob says it sure was! For the rest of the day it was hit the ball and drag Fred, hit the ball and drag Fred.


53 posted on 03/19/2019 4:15:45 PM PDT by dirtymac (Now is the time for all good men to come to the aid of their country! Now)
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To: JBW1949

My pleasure....


54 posted on 03/19/2019 6:51:05 PM PDT by Rummyfan (In any war between the civilized man and the savage, support the civilized man. Support Israel.)
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