Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

SATIRE: Pigeon Wearing MAGA Hat Attacked By Pigeon Antifa
The Babylon Bee ^ | February 20th, 2020 | The Babylon Bee

Posted on 02/21/2020 10:26:03 AM PST by Forgiven_Sinner

LAS VEGAS, NV—Local pigeon Claude Beaker was proudly wearing his new MAGA hat in downtown Vegas.

"The economy is good, and there's lots of leftover bread crumbs and stuff for us pigeons," Beaker told reporters. "Trump has some personal moral failings, but the economy is doing well, and that's what matters for the fowl members of society."

But sadly, just a few hours later, Beaker was brutally attacked in broad daylight by the dreaded domestic terrorist group Pigeon Antifa.

Clad in ski masks and bandanas, the pigeons swooped in and threw tiny bricks and adorable little Molotov cocktails at Beaker. They even made a cute little milkshake with cement and threw it all over Beaker. Some of the pigeons had to leave to go back to their pigeon mommies and daddies because it was past their bedtime, but the rest continued the assault for over an hour, jeering at Beaker.

Pigeon police shrugged and said they didn't want to interfere. "Honestly, we're just winging it here," Pigeon Chief of Police Peck Peckems said. "Now if you'll excuse me, someone just dropped a donut over on Fourth Street, and we need to investigate."

Beaker was finally saved by local mob lords Bobby, Squit, and Pesto, who weren't too fond of Antifa edging in on their territory.


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: antifa; chat; maga; magahats; notnews; pigeons; satire
See if you can read this without laughing.
1 posted on 02/21/2020 10:26:03 AM PST by Forgiven_Sinner
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies]

To: Forgiven_Sinner

this news is for the birds...


2 posted on 02/21/2020 10:37:49 AM PST by SteveH (Zintentionally blank)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Forgiven_Sinner; Daffynition
Beaker was finally saved by local mob lords Bobby, Squit, and Pesto, who weren't too fond of Antifa edging in on their territory.


3 posted on 02/21/2020 10:43:39 AM PST by Ezekiel (The pun is mightier than the s-word. Goy to the World!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Forgiven_Sinner

Gotta love the folks at the Bee. That was fun.


4 posted on 02/21/2020 10:45:54 AM PST by paulcissa (Politicians want you unarmed so they can kill you.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Forgiven_Sinner
Beaker was finally saved by local mob lords Bobby, Squit, and Pesto

Nice reference!

5 posted on 02/21/2020 10:49:10 AM PST by Jonah Hex
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Forgiven_Sinner
I liked the bike lock that one of the antifa pigeons was wielding.
Too bad the real Antifa clown (some adjunct professor at one of the Bay Area junior colleges), just got a slap on the wrist.
6 posted on 02/21/2020 11:02:48 AM PST by El Cid (Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be saved, and thy house...)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Ezekiel

There they are, the 3 Amigos!


7 posted on 02/21/2020 11:09:08 AM PST by Daffynition (*Mega Dittoes and Mega Prayers* & :))
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

To: Forgiven_Sinner

“local mob lords Bobby, Squit, and Pesto”

Goodfeathers :D


8 posted on 02/21/2020 11:46:48 AM PST by Boogieman
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Whenifhow; null and void; aragorn; EnigmaticAnomaly; kalee; Kale; AZ .44 MAG; Baynative; bgill; ...

p


9 posted on 02/22/2020 8:24:42 AM PST by bitt (new q posts)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Forgiven_Sinner

10 posted on 02/22/2020 8:29:43 AM PST by bitt (new q posts)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Forgiven_Sinner
"The economy is good, and there's lots of leftover bread crumbs and stuff for us pigeons," Beaker told reporters...

Funny from start to finish... thanks for posting.

11 posted on 02/22/2020 10:36:22 AM PST by GOPJ ( http://www.tinyurl.com/cvirusmap https://www.cdc.gov/flu/weekly/usmap.htm)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: GOPJ

Here’s my favorite line, “Pigeon police shrugged and said they didn’t want to interfere. “Honestly, we’re just winging it here,” Pigeon Chief of Police Peck Peckems said. “Now if you’ll excuse me, someone just dropped a donut over on Fourth Street, and we need to investigate.””


12 posted on 02/22/2020 1:18:07 PM PST by Forgiven_Sinner (Seek you first the kingdom of God, and all things will be given to you.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 11 | View Replies]

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
General/Chat
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson