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President Biden Sad To Hear That Nice Blonde Nurse Who Always Follows Him Around Has COVID
The Babylon Bee ^ | August 16, 2022 | The Babylon Bee

Posted on 08/17/2022 10:42:27 AM PDT by Tolerance Sucks Rocks

WASHINGTON, D.C. — White House sources say President Biden expressed sadness upon hearing that the nice blonde nurse who always follows him around every day has come down with COVID.

President Biden reportedly first realized his nurse might be sick when he sat down to watch Matlock, and after seven hours she had still not arrived to turn on the television.

"I'm sorry to hear that Nurse Abigail got the CovoPox. She'll be sorely missed," said Biden to reporters while attempting to put on his glasses but just repeatedly poking himself in the eyes with them. "I hear it's a nasty bug, so I'm grateful to have never come down with it."

President Biden then expressed hopes that his next nurse will "be a lot younger, preferably blonde, but I ain't picky, any young nurse would do, really."

Reports later surfaced that President Biden attempted to dress himself without assistance from his nurse, only to lose his shoes, tear his shirt, shove his head through a Washington mural, and eat the White House cat.

At publishing time, White House plumbers were working to remove an adult diaper from the kitchen garbage disposal.

(Excerpt) Read more at babylonbee.com ...


TOPICS: Chit/Chat; Health/Medicine; Humor; Miscellaneous; Society; Weird Stuff
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; covid; jillbiden; joebiden; lololololololololol; satire; whitehouse

1 posted on 08/17/2022 10:42:27 AM PDT by Tolerance Sucks Rocks
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

Hay, she’s a DOCTOR!


2 posted on 08/17/2022 10:44:08 AM PDT by Paladin2
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
That's doctor nice blonde, sir.
3 posted on 08/17/2022 10:44:17 AM PDT by BenLurkin (The above is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion, or satire, or both.)
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
Biden then expressed hopes that his next nurse will "be a lot younger, preferably blonde...

And a better dresser.

4 posted on 08/17/2022 10:45:12 AM PDT by 1Old Pro
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

Gotta love the Bee!


5 posted on 08/17/2022 10:45:39 AM PDT by immadashell (Save Innocent Lives: Ban Gun Free Zones)
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

6 posted on 08/17/2022 10:47:33 AM PDT by gundog ( It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen. )
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To: gundog

7 posted on 08/17/2022 10:52:46 AM PDT by BenLurkin (The above is not a statement of fact. It is either opinion, or satire, or both.)
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

The not-so-nice blond “doctor” who leads brandon around is not-so-fond of that nice blonde nurse.


8 posted on 08/17/2022 10:55:18 AM PDT by DPMD ( )
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

Does she pick up after him or something?


9 posted on 08/17/2022 11:01:12 AM PDT by Telepathic Intruder
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

Somebody has to fill in for the Easter Bunny.


10 posted on 08/17/2022 11:05:02 AM PDT by Billthedrill
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Had me going for a second until I saw “sat down to watch Matlock”…beed again


11 posted on 08/17/2022 11:11:46 AM PDT by dsrtsage ( Complexity is just simple lacking imagination)
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

Joe’s trying to put his coat on with the help of his “doctor” wife, then dropping his aviator glasses, was a comedy routine worthy of Charlie Chaplin!


12 posted on 08/17/2022 11:34:49 AM PDT by The_Media_never_lie (Remember August 8!)
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To: BenLurkin

I thought Trump got 81 million and Biden supposedly got 83 million?

I remember thinking that those two numbers added up is half the country.
And if you remove the under 18, sick, and elderly (let say a conservative 30% of the country) then it meant almost 70% turnout of eligible voters.

Ridiculous


13 posted on 08/17/2022 11:37:14 AM PDT by Mr. K (No consequence of repealing obamacare is worse than obamacare itself)
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks
"I'm sorry to hear that Nurse Abigail got the CovoPox. She'll be sorely missed,"

Biden doesn't recognize, or remember, his wife now?

14 posted on 08/17/2022 11:48:53 AM PDT by The Sons of Liberty (Ultra MAGA!)
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

Just like Qaddafi, except only one hot nurse is willing to follow the sniffer.


15 posted on 08/17/2022 12:19:19 PM PDT by rfp1234 (Comitia asinorum et rhinocerum delenda sunt.)
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To: BenLurkin

https://twitter.com/kayleighmcenany/status/1320117044612943872?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E1320117044612943872%7Ctwgr%5E77b0523600d39af4e24974ddb1a590c27522ee21%7Ctwcon%5Es1_&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.ibtimes.sg%2Fjoe-biden-admits-election-fraud-video-confession-here-truth-54863

“We have put together, I think, the most extensive and inclusive voter fraud organization in the history of American politics.”

The above quote is taken out of context claims MSM. Your numbers say otherwise.


16 posted on 08/17/2022 12:31:48 PM PDT by Chgogal (Uncle Brandon wants your money.)
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