Transportation Secretary Pete Buttigieg Holds Emergency Press Conference To Announce He Is Taking 3 More Months Maternity Leave

Babylon Bee ^ | Mar 26, 2024 | Babylon Bee

[george76]

In the morning after a tragic cargo ship accident and bridge collapse in Baltimore, Transportation Secretary Pete Buttigieg called an emergency press conference to announce he is taking three more months of maternity leave.

"It has come to my attention that the twin babies I purchased at the baby store require more undivided attention," said Buttigieg. "I will be taking some much-needed time off to care for my children, and that is in no way related to the tragic bridge collapse that apparently happened somewhere. Right now, I need to be a mother to my children. Please respect my family's privacy during this time."

Buttigieg then refused to take questions before jumping into a waiting helicopter and flying out of sight.

According to sources, Buttigieg still has 38 months of paid maternity leave available should he need it.

At publishing time, Buttigieg had issued an update, saying he would be extending his leave through the end of December.

[Sacajaweau]

if he wasn’t gay....he wouldn’t have this job.

[Uncle Miltie]

Truly, a Butt Gig.

[metmom]

The Babylon Bee - Tomorrow’s News Today.

[SaxxonWoods]

Hee Hee.

[twister881]

>>The Babylon Bee - Tomorrow’s News Today<<
.
The temporal gap between parody and bizarre reality is de minimis with the Commie ‘RATS in charge and a vegetable planted in the White House.

[Bonemaker]

Who even knew the finnochio was back from the last one?

[Zuriel]

World class poster boy for ‘Didn’t Earn It’.

[SpaceBar]

The bee always manages to coax a little smile out of me.

That said, Buttigieg is nausea inducing.

[oil_dude]

It might make it more difficult for him to get baby formula for his ‘chestfeeder’

[ronniesgal]

Pete is a flaming asshole, but the woman that gave this deviant her babies is a bigger asshole IMHO.

[PIF]

poor guy, he’s pregnant again.

[Fireone]

Worthless POS.
The Bee gets it right every time!

[SunkenCiv]

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[Fido969]

"It has come to my attention that the twin babies I purchased at the baby store require more undivided attention,"

Absolutely brutal.

[bitt]

p

[norsky]

Rectal tags need trim’n again

[Candor7]

Sodom and Gomorrah, maternity Leave negotiated and approved:

[GOPJ]

"It has come to my attention that the twin babies I purchased at the baby store require more undivided attention," said Buttigieg. "I will be taking some much-needed time off to care for my children, and that is in no way related to the tragic bridge collapse that apparently happened somewhere.

LOL