KIDS ASK DOUG FROM UPLAND - No. 4

Kids Ask Doug from Upland series | 11-7-03 | dfu

[ml/nj]

Dear Doug from Upland,

What about the questions Jesse Jackson and other Blacks were asking in the days just before the whole Monica thing broke about the bullet hole in Ron Brown's head? Do you think you may have been fooled by the old presto-changeo trick?

Love, ML/NJ

[doug from upland]

There was no bullet hole in Ron Brown's head. Clinton was not laughing at the funeral. And Hillary is not a b*itch. I hope that clears it up for the Art Bell audience.

[visualops]

lol yr killin me

[ml/nj]

There was no bullet hole in Ron Brown's head. Clinton was not laughing at the funeral. And Hillary is not a b*itch. I hope that clears it up for the Art Bell audience.

Dear DFU, Thanks for the reply. I guess that straightens everything out. But who is Art Bell?

ML/NJ

[doug from upland]

Art Bell is a radio host who believes in every whacked out scientific conspiracy ever invented. If a caller claimed that the ghost of Hitler had sex with a goat that came from another galaxy and the result was Hillary Clinton, he would be it. Hey, wait. I believe that one.

[doug from upland]

Not "he would be it." He would believe it.

[GeronL]

Dear Doug didn't Art Bell retire over a year ago because of back problems? ... and no I will not mention getting hooked on pain pills to keep his show going, I will NOT do it!

[Cicero]

Dear Doug from Upland:

Now I'm getting curious. If there was no hole in Ron Brown's head, why did three military forensic specialists tell a reporter that there was, and that they had seen it? And where did that x-ray come from that was posted on the internet, which one of the forensic specialists had been using for his slide shows, with a ruler below it showing that the hole was approximately .45" in diameter?

I should explain that even though I'm only 12 years old, I'm a computer geek and I like to surf the net.

Sincerely,

Johnny from LA

[doug from upland]

He actually came back a month or so ago and does a show on Saturday and Sunday night. Did you know that Art is the reincarnation of a rod that escaped from a black hole?

[GeronL]

He came back?? geez.

[doug from upland]

No 11 is not a sexual reference. A rod is some kind of creature that floats through the air a incredible speed and shares our world. The black hole refers to a collapsed star.

[doug from upland]

You have been listening to too much right wing hate talk radio.

[GeronL]

It was Terry McAllife who shot Ron Brown in the head before jumping out of the plane with a parachute and then blowing up the plane by remote control. He then flew an SR-71 back to DC in time for a dinner party that night with Chinese military bhuddists.

[GeronL]

Actually I knew what a rod was. I saw a TV show about them. I don't know what those things were but I doubt they were alive.

[nicmarlo]

Dear Doug,

I saw a picture of Clinton with tears in his eyes at Ron Brown's funeral. Doesn't this mean he was really crying, or what he just pretending?

Nicmarlo
From NY, CA, CO, and NY (again)

[doug from upland]

I just thought I would clarify it since I used rod and black hole together. I know what the male audience is like here. :)

[doug from upland]

There is nothing about the man that is not phony.

[Poohbah]

Most countries prefer the term "hypermass" to avoid offensive connotations re: "black hole."