Prison Visitor Allegedly Uses Vagina To Smuggle Live Grenade

AP ^ | April 20, 2006 | The Associated Press

[Westlander]

SAN SALVADOR, El Salvador -- A Salvadoran woman is in some trouble after she allegedly tried to smuggle into the country's main prison a military grenade and marijuana hidden in her vagina.

The cylinder was about 10 inches long and 4 inches wide. Officials didn't say what prompted them to check Lidia Alvarado, 44, but authorities have raised the security level at jails across the country, fearing inmates may be planning something.

[albee]

"There once was a woman named Alice
Who used dynamite as a phallus.
They found her vagina in South Carolina,
And both of her cheeks down in Dallas."

EXCELLENT!

[dangus]

No, only about 12. But a good 120 cubic inches!

[dangus]

Stories like this? Uh, yeah... what sort of enlightened philosophical commentary goes with a story like this?

[dangus]

Paging William Hung... Paging William Hung... Time for you to sing "She-Bang."

[wafflehouse]

LMAO

[dangus]

>> Not really. A baby's head is about that 4" in diameter. <<

Uh, yeah... And most women don't exactly enjoy that experience! (I know, most of the pain is to the cervix, but still...)

[MoochPooch]

One of my favorite things about FR is the wit of the posters we have here.

My postings are seriously lame compared to other people's here.

[metmom]

Officials didn't say what prompted them to check Lidia Alvarado, 44, ...

One can only imagine.

[ApplegateRanch]

Bang bang Rosie?

"Rosie, Don't Bang Onna The Piano!"?

The cylinder was about 10 inches long and 4 inches wide.

Oh, Lidia! Talk about "loose lips sinking tattooed battleships around her hips..."

Officials didn't say what prompted them to check Lidia Alvarado

The way she was walking shuffling, combined with the pained rictus on her face??

[ArmstedFragg]

Lidia Alvarado, 44

It was safe to assume from the headline that she wasn't a twenty-year-old.

[ozzymandus]

There once was a gal from Nantucket....

[metmom]

Do people here mainly respond to stories with wisecracks?

Only stories like this that deserve it.

[WKUHilltopper]

Cripes...did they find the tank too?

[Triggerhippie]

The now-famous thrill seeker Lydia,
Shocked FReepers worldwide, I’ll not kid Ya.
The a frag ‘nade and pot,
Were held in her tw*t,
By Kegels and real bad Chlamydia.

[Tiberius109]

AHHHHHHHHHHHH ahahahah too funny

[Tiberius109]

or the way she walked.

[Tiberius109]

There is more than one way to kill a beaver I always say .

[metmom]

Yeah, but no woman with a baby's head in that position is walking, she's usually screaming. Just cause it technically can fit is irrelevant.

[Robwin]

Told story to wife. Her comment:"Bet she only dates porn stars now, and even then ask, 'Is that all you got'?"

[Theresawithanh]

I get a good one in every so often, but it's rare!