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Conservative Christians Not Laughing at First Lady's Comedy Act (BARF ALERT!)
The Swift Report ^ | 5/2/05

Posted on 05/02/2005 8:23:14 AM PDT by areafiftyone

First Lady Laura Bush may have stolen the show with her surprise comedy routine at this weekend's White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, but her jokes and one-liners have made her no new friends among conservative Christians. In an official statement, one 'pro-family' advocacy group warned that Mrs. Bush's jokes at the President's expense were in violation of the Biblical command that wives respect their husbands.

Some shocked by Mrs. Bush's reference to herself as a "desperate housewife"

WASHINGTON, DC—The First Lady may have stolen the show with her surprise comedy routine at the 91st White House Correspondents' Association Dinner, but not everyone appreciated her jokes and one-liners poking fun at President Bush. At least one organization of conservative Christians quickly lashed out at Mrs. Bush's performance, warning that her remarks at the President's expense were a public refutation of the Biblical command that wives should respect their husbands.

According to an official statement released over the weekend by the Coalition for Traditional Values, an organization that seeks a more flexible relationship between church and state, Mrs. Bush's jokes at her husband's expense amounted to a public emasculation of the President. Pastor Roy DeLong, the statement's author and chair of the group, warns that the First Lady's performance comes at a time when the Mr. Bush's "manliness is already under attack."

Laura: Meet Ephesians

As a believer, President Bush is no doubt familiar with the passage from Ephesians that says 'Wives, submit yourselves unto your husbands, as unto the Lord,'" says Mr. DeLong. "That means that just as Christ is the head of the church, the husband is the head of the wife. That is not the

Mrs. Bush interrupted a speech being given by her husband at the annual dinner, remarking that "I have a few things I want to say for a change." She then proceeded to mock his performance, both public ("if you really want to end tyranny in the world, you're going to have to stay up later") and private, noting that by nine o'clock, Mr. Bush, whom she referred to as "Mr. Excitement," is typically sound asleep.

"One of the Proverbs says that 'a virtuous woman is a crown to her husband, but she that maketh him ashamed is as rottenness in his bones," notes Mr. DeLong. "I bet President Bush is feeling pretty rotten today."

Manliness in question

The rebuke to the First Lady's stand-up act comes on the heels of mounting concern about the President's image. Last week, Mr. Bush was seen holding hands with Crown Prince Abdullah of Saudi Arabia. Then the President raised eyebrows anew when he asked a crowd of supporters in Galveston, TX if they celebrated Splash Day, an annual gay pride event in that state, best known for attracting tens of thousands of buff men, wearing little more than suntan oil.

Even some members of Mr. Bush's famously loyal party looked askance at his recommendation during a speech on the nation's energy needs last week, when he encouraged Americans to consider driving hybrid vehicles, widely believed to be 'gay' cars.

Depraved housewives?

While the Coalition for Traditional Values was the first conservative advocacy group to jump on the First Lady's comments, more criticism is expected. In her remarks, Mrs. Bush likened herself to a desperate housewife, a reference to the hit show on ABC, noting that she watches the show with Lynne Cheney, wife of the Vice President.

"Desperate Housewives" has come under heavy fire from pro-family groups, including the American Decency Association, which has called for a boycott of ABC for airing the "degraded" show. Last fall, Mrs. Cheney asked the federal government to step in to protect the nation's children from the "Desperate Housewives."


TOPICS: News/Current Events
KEYWORDS: articleissatire; laurabush; satire; whcadinner
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To: areafiftyone

These people obviously didn't hear the ending to the First Lady's routine. It was as loving, as respectful of her husband as anything I've ever heard.


101 posted on 05/02/2005 9:22:13 AM PDT by mombonn (¡Viva Bush/Cheney!)
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To: areafiftyone
I'm sorry, but these people need to lighten up they sound like nuts!

Not only that. I will bet you dimes, dollars, to doughnuts that some of these Carrie Nation nutjobs are engaging in cornholio with members of the same sex. Laura Bush was worth several million votes in the past election, but you wouldn't know it to hear these folks.

Be Seeing You,

Chris

102 posted on 05/02/2005 9:22:53 AM PDT by section9 (Major Motoko Kusanagi says, "Jesus is Coming. Everybody look busy...")
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To: sarasotarepublican

I don't disagree with that sentiment. I do not watch the show though others in my household do. I thought that since part of the reason that the spoof worked was that Laura was being everything she isn't in real life, that such a comparison added to the effect. I think most people know she adores her husband and is the farthest thing from a "desperate housewife" that we know of.

As for your other sentiment, I watched two episodes of "Law and Order" with my parents over the weekend and during the second one my dad asked "What gory show are we watching now?" I suggested changing the channel.


103 posted on 05/02/2005 9:24:14 AM PDT by Colonel_Flagg (Ah, spring! Such as it is.)
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To: areafiftyone

Laura did NOT cross the line of disrespecting her husband, IMHO.

She was lovingly funny, sparkling, teasing and endearing.

Seeing the comments written on the page, they are not nearly as amusing.

For those who didn't see the performance, find the download from "the political teen". Her face and body language absolutely conveyed her love for her husband.

Laura is being maligned undeservedly.


104 posted on 05/02/2005 9:25:00 AM PDT by baseballmom
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To: areafiftyone
...Coalition for Traditional Values...

*Snort*. People sitting around just looking for ways to be offended.

Ironic ...

...and not unlike all those sin-infested liberals.

105 posted on 05/02/2005 9:26:18 AM PDT by GoldCountryRedneck (The Flogging Will Continue Until Morale Improves)
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To: areafiftyone
How many out there think Christians are being had on this one and that no such organization really exists outside of the imaginations of the "Swift" report itself and a weblog bunker wedged somewhere between the rag mop closet and steam pipes, buried deep inside the physical plant bowels of Bob Jones University?

The "Swift" report. Yeah. Really swift.

Not surprising that they don't happent to mention the physical location of this alleged pastor in the article.

106 posted on 05/02/2005 9:27:21 AM PDT by Agamemnon
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To: Dales
Swift Report is a satire.

Satire generally involves adding some humorous twist to gain a unique perspective on something.

This is just fictional news.

107 posted on 05/02/2005 9:28:59 AM PDT by dead (I've got my eye out for Mullah Omar.)
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To: George Smiley
"It's people like this that caused Mencken to quip: Puritanism: the haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy."

America does have strong Puritan roots, and they seem to run through both the Left and the Right. Rightwing Puritan roots manifest themselves through some of the "Religious Right - hardshell Baptists, Moral Majority, social conservatives, etc," while on the Left they manifest in the form of political correctness and feminism.

108 posted on 05/02/2005 9:29:45 AM PDT by Sam Cree (Democrats are herd animals)
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To: areafiftyone

Who is "Swift Report". This whole thing sounds like an MSM lie.


109 posted on 05/02/2005 9:29:52 AM PDT by samtheman
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To: dmz

I like your perspective.


110 posted on 05/02/2005 9:31:48 AM PDT by peacebaby (I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man, I keep his house. Zsa Zsa Gabor)
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To: areafiftyone
The President is the leader of the Free World and forcefully pursuing a World War. He was a fighter pilot back in the days of the Century Series jets. He hardly needs anyone's affirmation of his manliness. He can certainly stand up to a few zingers from his very devoted and loyal wife.

I doubt anyone seriously believes Laura Bush watches Desparate Housewives - it was a good set up for follow-on jokes. Does anyone think she, Condi, Karen, and Lynne really went to Chippendales?

The glitterari may not understand but the WH Press Corps knows by now that the President starts his day at 5AM. Simple math says he better be in bed by 10PM most nights so the 9PM line was a trivial exaggeration.

111 posted on 05/02/2005 9:32:28 AM PDT by Dilbert56
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To: areafiftyone

Yeah, nice try. I'm sure there were some bluenoses somewhere who were offended, but there is no groundswell of angst among fundamentalist Christians because of Laura Bush's comments. Only to the media do Christians appear totally humorless, and that's only because they don't find gutter jokes, bathroom japes, and raw vulgarity funny.


112 posted on 05/02/2005 9:32:39 AM PDT by IronJack
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To: dead

Point conceded.


113 posted on 05/02/2005 9:34:17 AM PDT by Dales
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To: areafiftyone
How many out there think Christians are being had on this one and that no such organization really exists outside of the imaginations of the "Swift" report itself and a weblog bunker wedged somewhere between the rag mop closet and steam pipes, buried deep inside the bowels of the physical plant at Bob Jones University?

The "Swift" report. Yeah. Really swift.

Not surprising that they don't happen to mention much more than the name of this alleged pastor and his knockoff organization, isn't it?

Basic credibility alert.

114 posted on 05/02/2005 9:34:21 AM PDT by Agamemnon
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To: Sam Cree

The conservatives, if given free reign, would try to control the sexual and pharmaceutical aspects of peoples' lives.

The liberals, if given free reign, would try to control all the others.


115 posted on 05/02/2005 9:36:16 AM PDT by George Smiley (This tagline deliberately targeted journalists.)
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To: MeanWestTexan
"I am very tired of humorless, dour, bitter, pin-heads being the vocal voice of Christianity. Makes us look like twits." Maybe Dubya should have responded to Laura's "desperate housewife" remark by pointing out that he's a "family guy." That should make Brent Bozell blow a gasket!
116 posted on 05/02/2005 9:38:48 AM PDT by sawdust ("Justice Marshall has made his decision, now let him enforce it"--Pres. Andrew Jackson)
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To: Dales

Here's the url for one of their letters to Presiden Bush:

http://swiftreport.blogs.com/news/coalition_letter.pdf

Basically, they have an issue w/ how the Bush firls are dressing...


117 posted on 05/02/2005 9:38:58 AM PDT by Pessimist
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To: Pessimist

Again-- it is made up. See above.


118 posted on 05/02/2005 9:39:59 AM PDT by Dales
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To: All

Well I apologize to everyone if this turns out to be a parody website. It seemed like it was a newsite to me. It is a very strange site.


119 posted on 05/02/2005 9:40:27 AM PDT by areafiftyone (Politicians Are Like Diapers, Both Need To Be Changed Often And For The Same Reason!)
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To: areafiftyone

For consideration.

Is there a “shadow” organization which is attempting to discredit the message of the Traditional Values Coalition?

Traditional Values Coalition
http://www.traditionalvalues.org/about.php
Chairman: Rev. Louis P. Sheldon
DC Office
Traditional Values Coalition
139 "C" Street, SE
Washington, DC 20003
Phone: (202) 547-8570
Fax: (202) 546-6403

Compare the above-mentioned organization to THIS organization which authored this letter, addressed to President Bush, (letter signed by Roy DeLong). This is the letter which is critical of First Lady Bush's refering the TV program "Desperate Housewives."

http://swiftreport.blogs.com/news/coalition_letter.pdf#search='Coalition%20for%20Traditional%20Values%20delong'

Coalition for Traditional Values
Lewis Sheldrick
139 “Q” Steet, NW
Washington, TC 2003
Phone: (202) 547-8570
Fax: (202) 546-6403

I think an Internet scam is in the works. Notice the similaries of the street address (similar but not the same.) Notice the differences in the name of Lewis Sheldrick vs Rev. Louis Sheldon.

Am I being paranoid here? Input, anyone?


120 posted on 05/02/2005 9:41:29 AM PDT by i_dont_chat
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