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Woman Comes Forward To Detail Atrocities In Herman Cainís Apartment (Satire Attempt)
The Right Elective Decisions ^ | 11/03/2011 | Chris Davis

Posted on 11/03/2011 6:17:34 PM PDT by writer33

Washington,D.C. – With all of the accusations flying about what Herman Cain knew and when he knew it, one woman has dared to come forward and detail the atrocities of one horrific night in 1991. Previously, the woman was scared to come forward, but since Cain’s long train of abuses have been well-documented by the Politico, it only made sense to tell the public just what they can expect from a Cain presidency.

The woman, Sharon Itall, is now an influential insurance agent, but was once just the shell of a scarred woman after one night with Herman Cain. And since the allegations have surfaced, Sharon is willing to chronicle the events of that steamy, August night in Washington, D.C. In her opinion, there is simply no choice in the matter now.

Sharon says that the “denigrating events” all began at an office party. “It began by floating a keg that Mr. Cain had purchased for our office party,” stated Sharon. “Needless to say we were drunk, but I had no idea that the evening would spiral into a night of hell.”

TRED (The Right Elective Decisions) has not confirmed any of this story but feels compelled to keep you riveted to your computer screen. And this is the rest of her fateful story:

TRED: What exactly happened on that fateful night?

Sharon: Humiliation beyond belief. That’s what happened. (She begins to break down.)...


TOPICS: Government; Humor; Politics; Society
KEYWORDS: atrocities; blackwalnuts; chrisdavis; herbcain; hermancain; writer33
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To: Lib-Lickers 2
Did you bump your head before you wrote that?

I guess you missed that big word at the end of the title called "Satire"...

61 posted on 11/03/2011 8:54:38 PM PDT by Clint N. Suhks (You cannot help the poor by destroying the rich: Abraham Lincoln)
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To: writer33
Stop it you’ll make me cry.

Oh dear.

:consults employee handbook:

:Pats shoulder comfortingly:

There there.

There there

:consults handbook again:

There there

Would you....

:Pause. Turns page:

Like to talk about it?

62 posted on 11/03/2011 9:13:28 PM PDT by Harmless Teddy Bear (*Philosophy lesson 117-22b: Anyone who demands to be respected is undeserving of it.*)
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To: Harmless Teddy Bear
Pats shoulder comfortingly

BATTERY!

Time to replace that employee handbook.

63 posted on 11/03/2011 10:37:47 PM PDT by TChad
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To: Harmless Teddy Bear

LOL! Good stuff, HTB.


64 posted on 11/04/2011 6:27:18 AM PDT by writer33 (Mark Levin Is The Constitutional Engine Of Conservatism)
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To: writer33

bttt


65 posted on 11/04/2011 6:49:42 AM PDT by Matchett-PI (Obamageddon, Barackalypse Now! Bam is "Debt Man Walking" in 2012 - Rush Limbaugh)
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To: Matchett-PI

Thanks for the bump, M.


66 posted on 11/04/2011 7:35:03 AM PDT by writer33 (Mark Levin Is The Constitutional Engine Of Conservatism)
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To: writer33

Glad to! bttt :)


67 posted on 11/04/2011 7:43:07 AM PDT by Matchett-PI (Obamageddon, Barackalypse Now! Bam is "Debt Man Walking" in 2012 - Rush Limbaugh)
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To: writer33

One has to go to the article and read the whole thing to get the true flavor. I thought it was pretty funny.

(BTW, White font on black background sux.)


68 posted on 11/04/2011 7:46:15 AM PDT by Cyber Liberty (Cain = National Sales Tax; Perry = Amnesty for Illegals; Romney = Obamacare forever. Who's left?)
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To: Cyber Liberty

Thank you, CL. I appreciate it. I can see I’m still going to have to experiment with the color schemes. I haven’t settled on one I even like yet. But this opinion is greatly appreciated.


69 posted on 11/04/2011 7:51:10 AM PDT by writer33 (Mark Levin Is The Constitutional Engine Of Conservatism)
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To: writer33
You're welcome! Much better now. The white-on-black was hard to read, and I associate that scheme with porn sites...not that I would ever know about that....lol
70 posted on 11/04/2011 8:33:12 AM PDT by Cyber Liberty (Cain = National Sales Tax; Perry = Amnesty for Illegals; Romney = Obamacare forever. Who's left?)
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To: Cyber Liberty

There’s an angle I never thought of, and now I’m glad I changed it. But you’re right...it is easier to read.


71 posted on 11/04/2011 9:03:54 AM PDT by writer33 (Mark Levin Is The Constitutional Engine Of Conservatism)
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To: TheVitaminPress; SandRat

I forgot to ping you two ping! Let me know if you like, hate it or are indifferent.


72 posted on 11/04/2011 6:43:30 PM PDT by writer33 (Mark Levin Is The Constitutional Engine Of Conservatism)
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To: Red Badger; patton; Dem Guard; TASMANIANRED; skinkinthegrass; Liberty Valance; B4Ranch

Thought you might like this one time ping only!


73 posted on 11/04/2011 6:46:40 PM PDT by writer33 (Mark Levin Is The Constitutional Engine Of Conservatism)
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To: Judith Anne; NonValueAdded

One time thought you’d enjoy this ping!


74 posted on 11/04/2011 6:48:52 PM PDT by writer33 (Mark Levin Is The Constitutional Engine Of Conservatism)
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To: raybbr

Thought you might enjoy this or at least let me know whether you like it or not. And the comments are fun to read as well, ping!


75 posted on 11/04/2011 6:56:30 PM PDT by writer33 (Mark Levin Is The Constitutional Engine Of Conservatism)
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To: LUV W; nutmeg

Thought you might enjoy this ping!


76 posted on 11/04/2011 7:43:41 PM PDT by writer33 (Mark Levin Is The Constitutional Engine Of Conservatism)
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To: writer33

Well, it’s VERY good to see you, Ma’am! Thanks for the ping! :)


77 posted on 11/04/2011 7:47:24 PM PDT by LUV W (This tagline reserved for a hero.......)
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To: LUV W

You’re welcome, sir.


78 posted on 11/04/2011 7:48:48 PM PDT by writer33 (Mark Levin Is The Constitutional Engine Of Conservatism)
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To: stephenjohnbanker; camp_steveo; 50cal Smokepole; PROCON; penelopesire; dfwgator

One time thought you might enjoy this ping!


79 posted on 11/04/2011 8:03:49 PM PDT by writer33 (Mark Levin Is The Constitutional Engine Of Conservatism)
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To: writer33; TheOldLady

” The woman, Sharon Itall, is now an influential insurance agent “

I’ll bet she was the very devil with a blue dress on !!

: )

Good to hear from you Chris. Hope all is well with you.


80 posted on 11/06/2011 3:04:31 AM PST by stephenjohnbanker (God, family, country, mom, apple pie, the girl next door and a Ford F250 to pull my boat.)
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