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Felons Vying to Be Detroit's Mayor [semi-satire]
Semi-News/Semi-Satire ^ | 6 August 2017 | John Semmens

Posted on 08/06/2017 12:27:05 PM PDT by John Semmens

Half of the eight candidates for mayor on Detroit's Democratic primary ballot have been previously convicted criminals. Donna Marie Pitts has multiple felony convictions dating back to 1977. Danetta Simpson has a 1996 felony conviction for assault with intent to murder. Articia Bomer was charged in 2008 with carrying a concealed weapon. In 2004, Curtis Christopher Greene was sentenced to 18 months' probation under the Holmes Youthful Trainee Act for dealing marijuana and in 2005 plead guilty to writing a fraudulent check.

Pitts called her conviction stemming from a shoot out at an auto repair shop "an honest disagreement over the bill. Both sides were armed. Sending me to jail was bogus." She says she is running to "stamp out the kind of discrimination and racism that wrecked my life."

Simpson got into a dispute with a woman who was living with the father of two of her four children, pulled out a gun and fired a shot that missed hitting the other woman. She contends that she was "wrongfully convicted. No one was hurt. How is that an assault with intent? If I had intended to kill the bitch the bullet would've been in her head." She says she is running to offer voters "someone new and different."

Bomer was charged in 2008 with carrying a concealed weapon. "Overly suspicious" police approached her while she was sitting in a parked car and found a loaded gun in the vehicle. Bomer denied that it was hers, but was convicted during a bench trial in January 2009 and sentenced to a year of probation. She says she is running on a platform of "preservation, restoration and revitalization."

Greene contends that "my youthful indiscretions shouldn't be held against me. I have a seven point plan to rebuild Detroit. It addresses jobs, discriminatory lending and access to meaningful employment for convicted felons. I believe I'm the one to change the city."

Whether any of the former felons will be able to win over the four other candidates—incumbent Mayor Mike Duggan, state Sen. Coleman A. Young II, Edward Dean and Angelo Brown—that do not have criminal records seems improbable. However, this election is the first since the City went bankrupt under the governance on non-felon Democrats over the last five decades.

In related news, Fayetteville, N.C. Mayoral candidate Quancidine Gribble has been arrested twice in the last two months for stealing and vandalizing a water company's equipment. Gribble, a philosophy student, community activist and charity leader, contends that "water is a basic human need. No business has the right withhold it from the people. My action to liberate it from their control so it could flow freely to those who need it is simple social justice."

if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...

http://www.gopbriefingroom.com/index.php/topic,274871.0.html


TOPICS: Government; History; Humor; Politics
KEYWORDS: criminals; democrats; satire

1 posted on 08/06/2017 12:27:05 PM PDT by John Semmens
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To: John Semmens

And Detroit’s former mayor, Kwame Kilpatrick (the son of a US Congresswoman) is in prison for basically a life sentence.

And don’t forget that Mike Duggan, the current Mayor of Detroit is a white guy and won as a write-in candidate, and surely will win re-election.

Detroit is much safer than say Chicago or Baltimore or other places these days, who knew.


2 posted on 08/06/2017 12:55:34 PM PDT by quantim (Victory is not relative, it is absolute.)
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To: John Semmens

Here’s something the MSM is going to jump on. Oh yeah.


3 posted on 08/06/2017 1:04:56 PM PDT by Steely Tom (Liberals think in propaganda)
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