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Study: AC/DC’s ‘Highway To Hell’ More Theologically Accurate Than 96% Of Modern Worship Songs-SATIRE
The Babylon Bee ^ | 6/13/18 | Staff

Posted on 06/13/2018 8:18:13 AM PDT by fungoking

U.S.—A recent survey performed by CCLI confirmed that AC/DC’s hard rock classic “Highway to Hell” is more theologically accurate than 96% of the songs that most worship bands play on any given Sunday. The study examined over 800 songs and compared their theology to the Scriptures, and found that the Australian rock group’s 1979 classic was “significantly more accurate” than over 96% of them.

“While modern worship songs tend to contain little theology, an anemic view of sin, and a poor understanding of the work of the Holy Spirit, ‘Highway to Hell’ has a very biblical view of the doctrine of hell,” a CCLI rep said. “Lead singer Bon Scott had a clear understanding of man’s natural inclination toward sin and the inevitable judgment of God that follows.”

“Just take a look at some of those lyrics in that hard-hitting first verse,” the head CCLI researcher told reporters. “‘Don’t need reason, don’t need rhyme, Ain’t nothing I would rather do / Going down, party time, My friends are gonna be there too.'”

“Bon Scott’s understanding of mankind’s depravity clearly rivaled anything Paul wrote in the third chapter of Romans,” he added. “It’s better than that song that keeps inviting the Holy Spirit in like He’s some kind of coy puppy dog.”

Further findings confirmed that other metal classics like Iron Maiden’s “The Number of the Beast,” Metallica’s “Master of Puppets,” and Megadeth’s “Symphony of Destruction” were also more accurate than most songs played on Air1 or K-LOVE.


TOPICS: Humor; Religion
KEYWORDS: babylonbee; humor; religion; satire
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To: FNU LNU
I get that hell, in the Matthew 16:18 passage, would have been "hadu" (Gr., hades), but I think the "gate" of hell was considered to be Gehenna.

Meaning, hell had certain portals -- three gates, some of the Rabbis said --- one in the wilderness, one in the sea (I suppose that's the Mediterranean?) and one of them near Jerusalem (Gehenna).

I am no expert, not at all, and I don't know what this all means. It's not Catholic doctrine. I got the business about the portals from here:

http://www.jewishencyclopedia.com/articles/6558-gehenna

41 posted on 06/13/2018 5:26:10 PM PDT by Mrs. Don-o ("The floor of hell is paved with the skulls of bishops." - St. John Chrysostom, Bishop)
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To: cschroe

That song is pretty accurate except the last line.
Truth is that It’s never too late until you breath your last breath.

I am guessing you know that.
I love the bass lines on that song.


42 posted on 06/13/2018 5:34:59 PM PDT by right way right (May we remain sober over mere men, for God really is our only true hope.)
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To: Mrs. Don-o

Thanks for the link. I’ll check it out. You might check out the link I posted for study of Hell, as well.


43 posted on 06/13/2018 5:46:52 PM PDT by FNU LNU
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To: FNU LNU

Thank you.


44 posted on 06/13/2018 5:54:32 PM PDT by Mrs. Don-o ("Let us commend ourselves, and one another, and our whole life, unto Christ Our God.")
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To: dfwgator

I’m going to take Canning Hwy on my way home from work today. Right off the Kwinana (Mitchel) Freeway when heading south from Perth.


45 posted on 06/13/2018 11:36:25 PM PDT by JosephW (Mohammad Lied, People die!)
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To: Mrs. Don-o

Mrs. Don-o, I’ve read the piece you linked to, and I’m sorry, but it’s not concerned with the Bible’s teaching on Gehenna, but rather a lot of Jewish and even pagan tradition. The piece I pointed you to is based solely on the Bible’s teaching on the subject, as you have seen if you’ve looked at it.

If you’re concerned with the Bible’s teaching on the subject, particularly the 12 passages where Jesus taught on it, we can continue our conversation, otherwise, I have no interest.

Thanks again for your responses.


46 posted on 06/14/2018 7:24:37 AM PDT by FNU LNU
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To: kosciusko51

How true.


47 posted on 06/14/2018 7:28:53 AM PDT by bmwcyle (People who do not study history are destine to believe really ignorant statements.)
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To: FNU LNU

Thanks as well.


48 posted on 06/14/2018 8:17:25 AM PDT by Mrs. Don-o ("Let us commend ourselves, and one another, and our whole life, unto Christ Our God.")
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To: FNU LNU; redleghunter; Springfield Reformer; kinsman redeemer; BlueDragon; metmom; boatbums; ...
Our popular concept of hell is Roman Catholic tradition, pure and simple.

You can only wish there was no eternal torment, which Rome and many other churches are as gates to for multitudes. The angels are not going to cast the tares into a garbage dump in Israel for not being goats (and not believing in the lamb of God), but such represent a literal reality. Those in Hades will end up in the Lake of Fire.

And I say unto you, That many shall come from the east and west, and shall sit down with Abraham, and Isaac, and Jacob, in the kingdom of heaven. But the children of the kingdom shall be cast out into outer darkness: there shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth. (Matthew 8:11-12)

Whose fan is in his hand, and he will throughly purge his floor, and will gather the wheat into his garner; but the chaff he will burn with fire unquenchable. (Luke 3:17)

There shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth, when ye shall see Abraham, and Isaac, and Jacob, and all the prophets, in the kingdom of God, and you yourselves thrust out. (Luke 13:28)

The Son of man shall send forth his angels, and they shall gather out of his kingdom all things that offend, and them which do iniquity; And shall cast them into a furnace of fire: there shall be wailing and gnashing of teeth. (Matthew 13:41-42)

So shall it be at the end of the world: the angels shall come forth, and sever the wicked from among the just, And shall cast them into the furnace of fire: there shall be wailing and gnashing of teeth. (Matthew 13:49-50)Then said the king to the servants, Bind him hand and foot, and take him away, and cast him into outer darkness; there shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth. (Matthew 22:13)

The lord of that servant shall come in a day when he looketh not for him, and in an hour that he is not aware of, And shall cut him asunder, and appoint him his portion with the hypocrites: there shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth. (Matthew 24:50-51)

And cast ye the unprofitable servant into outer darkness: there shall be weeping and gnashing of teeth. (Matthew 25:30)

When the Son of man shall come in his glory, and all the holy angels with him, then shall he sit upon the throne of his glory: And before him shall be gathered all nations: and he shall separate them one from another, as a shepherd divideth his sheep from the goats: (Matthew 25:31-32) Then shall he say also unto them on the left hand, Depart from me, ye cursed, into everlasting fire, prepared for the devil and his angels: (Matthew 25:41) And these shall go away into everlasting punishment: but the righteous into life eternal. (Matthew 25:46)

And if thy hand offend thee, cut it off: it is better for thee to enter into life maimed, than having two hands to go into hell, into the fire that never shall be quenched: Where their worm dieth not, and the fire is not quenched. And if thy foot offend thee, cut it off: it is better for thee to enter halt into life, than having two feet to be cast into hell, into the fire that never shall be quenched: Where their worm dieth not, and the fire is not quenched. And if thine eye offend thee, pluck it out: it is better for thee to enter into the kingdom of God with one eye, than having two eyes to be cast into hell fire: Where their worm dieth not, and the fire is not quenched. (Mark 9:43-48)

And it came to pass, that the beggar died, and was carried by the angels into Abraham's bosom: the rich man also died, and was buried; And in hell he lift up his eyes, being in torments, and seeth Abraham afar off, and Lazarus in his bosom. And he cried and said, Father Abraham, have mercy on me, and send Lazarus, that he may dip the tip of his finger in water, and cool my tongue; for I am tormented in this flame. (Luke 16:22-24)

Then he said, I pray thee therefore, father, that thou wouldest send him to my father's house: For I have five brethren; that he may testify unto them, lest they also come into this place of torment. (Luke 16:27-28)

Who shall be punished with everlasting destruction from the presence of the Lord, and from the glory of his power; When he shall come to be glorified in his saints, and to be admired in all them that believe (because our testimony among you was believed) in that day. (2 Thessalonians 1:9-10)

The same shall drink of the wine of the wrath of God, which is poured out without mixture into the cup of his indignation; and he shall be tormented with fire and brimstone in the presence of the holy angels, and in the presence of the Lamb: And the smoke of their torment ascendeth up for ever and ever: and they have no rest day nor night, who worship the beast and his image, and whosoever receiveth the mark of his name. (Revelation 14:10-11)

And the beast was taken, and with him the false prophet that wrought miracles before him, with which he deceived them that had received the mark of the beast, and them that worshipped his image. These both were cast alive into a lake of fire burning with brimstone. (Revelation 19:20)

And the devil that deceived them was cast into the lake of fire and brimstone, where the beast and the false prophet are, and shall be tormented day and night for ever and ever. (Revelation 20:10)

Note: attempting to disallow eternal torment on disputable grammatical grounds cannot prevail since it is hardly tenable that the Lord's dire warnings, including hacking off appendage or gouging out eyes to avoid be cast into unquenchable hell fire, would have much of a deterrent effect if this simply refers to being burned up. Being able to indulge in decades of fulfilling lusts in exchange for momentary punishment would be considered worth it by most who seek to fulfill such.

Moreover, people will be cast into the same lake of fire the devil will, who shall be tormented day and night for ever and ever, and the beast and false prophet were still there after 1,000 years.

In addition,the account of the rich man and Lazarus in Luke 16:19-31 not a parable, in which real names are never used, and which stories employ known physical realities which correspond to spiritual realities (i.e. "tares" = "the children of the wicked"), and never teach science fiction in this correspondence. However, if there is no such thing as being cognizant of torment after death, then for the first and only time the Lord would be engaging in science fiction. And it is also stretch to make the rich man in Hell correspond to some mere spiritual reality that is not that of the afterlife and Hell.​

49 posted on 06/14/2018 11:58:58 AM PDT by daniel1212 (Trust the risen Lord Jesus to save you as a damned and destitute sinner + be baptized + follow Him)
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To: daniel1212

“You can only wish there was no eternal torment, which Rome and many other churches are as gates to for multitudes. The angels are not going to cast the tares into a garbage dump in Israel for not being goats (and not believing in the lamb of God), but such represent a literal reality. Those in Hades will end up in the Lake of Fire.”

You have no way of telling what my wishes are unless I tell you. I wouldn’t presume to judge your motives in such a manner. I wish is to only believe and teach what Jesus taught on Gehenna.

Which by the way is not in the passage you refer to in your first paragraph. And, have you ever noticed the time element in the parable of the tares?

Depending on how seriously you respond to my response, I’ll determine how much time to spend on your next response.

By the way, all the passages you refer to in your length response are dealt with in the link I posted much earlier. Did you take any time to examine that serious study? If not, why should I respond to your lengthy one?

Thanks for your response.


50 posted on 06/14/2018 12:45:53 PM PDT by FNU LNU
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To: FNU LNU; fungoking; daniel1212

Wow, what a piece of garbage that disguises itself as a “serious study”. Hope you seriously don’t believe this. Our Lord was rather clear what hell was and his audience knew it as well. And they didn’t get their information from Homer.


51 posted on 06/14/2018 1:03:34 PM PDT by HarleyD
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To: HarleyD

Please tell me the first passage the author misuses.


52 posted on 06/14/2018 1:17:47 PM PDT by FNU LNU
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To: E. Pluribus Unum

Me either.


53 posted on 06/14/2018 2:00:28 PM PDT by metmom ( ...fixing our eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of our faith......)
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To: fungoking; Bob434

Hell is going to be much worse than anyone can imagine, just as heaven is going to be much better than anyone can imagine.

I don’t find Bob’s description of hell to be Scripturally inaccurate.


54 posted on 06/14/2018 2:09:45 PM PDT by metmom ( ...fixing our eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of our faith......)
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To: HarleyD
Wow, what a piece of garbage that disguises itself as a “serious study”. Hope you seriously don’t believe this.

I believe the “serious study” is satire, like it says in the title.

55 posted on 06/14/2018 4:24:52 PM PDT by fungoking (Tis a pleasure to live in the 0zarks)
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To: wbarmy; redleghunter; Springfield Reformer; kinsman redeemer; BlueDragon; metmom; boatbums; ...

In contrast to so many classic hymns: http://peacebyjesus.witnesstoday.org/WorshipHymns.html


56 posted on 06/14/2018 6:01:22 PM PDT by daniel1212 (Trust the risen Lord Jesus to save you as a damned and destitute sinner + be baptized + follow Him)
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To: Mariner

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k9IfHDi-2EA


57 posted on 06/14/2018 6:35:35 PM PDT by Elsie (Heck is where people, who don't believe in Gosh, think they are not going...)
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To: Yogafist

‘Tis no more.

Too many Navajos getting killed walking along it drunk.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/U.S._Route_491


58 posted on 06/14/2018 6:38:18 PM PDT by Elsie (Heck is where people, who don't believe in Gosh, think they are not going...)
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To: PapaBear3625
I hate the "Jesus is my boyfriend" genre of church songs.

What shall we do with 'the Bride of Christ'?

59 posted on 06/14/2018 6:39:10 PM PDT by Elsie (Heck is where people, who don't believe in Gosh, think they are not going...)
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To: fungoking; HarleyD

He’s referring to the link in post 10, not the thread.


60 posted on 06/14/2018 7:03:01 PM PDT by metmom ( ...fixing our eyes on Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of our faith......)
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