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DUmmie FUnnies 03-09-06 ("The RoadMap to Impeachment: 'Violence' is The Answer")
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | March 9, 2006 | DUmmies and PJ-Comix

Posted on 03/09/2006 8:05:18 AM PST by PJ-Comix

The DUmmie implosion is proceeding apace as you can see in this THREAD titled, "The RoadMap to Impeachment: 'Violence' is The Answer." DUmmie author, Senator, placed "Violence" in quotes since he means the DUmmies should get "violent" not in the physical sense (which would get him arrested for publicly advocating it) but in the ANNOYING sense. Yes, DUmmie "genius" Senator wants the DUmmies to act incredibly ANNOYING in order to draw attention to their lost cause of impeachment. Ironically, by following DUmmie Senator's RoadMap advice, they are just harming their dopey cause even more since such tactics would only turn off MORE voters at the polls this November. So let us journey down the RoadMap to annoying DUmmie insanity in Bolshevik Red while the comments of your humble reporter, watching the DUmmies follow the RoadMap that leads directly off the electoral cliff, is in the [brackets]:

The RoadMap to Impeachment: "Violence" is The Answer

[The RoadMap to Defeat: "Violence" is The Answer.]

I've been asked to create a (votable) thread for this.

[I vote your thread the Nuttiest Thread of the Day, DUmmie Senator. Please lay out your insanity for us all to laugh at...]

It is my reaction to the Harper's Magazine Impeachment event from Thursday night. I found the discussion there brought a specific problem into sharp relief:

We all know what needs to happen, but we seem at a loss for "how to make in so."

[By making the EVIL Republicans laugh so hard that they don't notice your dopey impeachment manuevers?]

From Mr. Conyers's blog:

[I'm chuckling already. Continue...]

We had a rousing and informative evening last night in New York at the impeachment forum hosted by Harpers Magazine. ...

There was a lot of discussion about how impeachment should be presented, how we develop more support -- among Members and in the Media, and most importantly, where we go from here...

I have no doubt that not only would we take back the House and the Senate, but that we would be able to hold the Bush Administration accountable for their mistatements, misteps, and yes, their lies...

[Yeah, make this November's election theme that of impeachment. Hee! Hee!]

I think last night was a milestone. It was so gratifying to see all of our hard work in action outside the beltway...

[It was a milestone whose weight will sink you in November. Now back to the impeachment rantings of DUmmie Senator...]

Since I was lucky enough to be in attendance, I want to report that the most "rousing" part of the evening -- bringing the audience to their feet -- was the introduction of Mr. Conyers himself.

["And now the STAR of the evening, Mr. Insanity himself, HEEEEEEEERE'S JOHNNNNNNY!!!"]

And while I'll agree that the event was a milestone, I must also agree with the lukewarm reaction of the Salon reporter. Mainly because there was very little from the panel on what Mr. Conyers identifies in his entry here as most important: "where we go from here."

[To the candy store to buy lollipops to suck on?]

And this is where I must take issue and be frank; because the "where" is not in question. Mr. Conyers held the "where" in his hand; a special committee to investigate charges. It is the "how" that is in question and "develop more support" is not specific enough to be actionable. While I don't claim to have any magic bullet, I would like to suggest where the discussion was lacking on this issue because I think these failures are pervasive (on the left) and, at least to some degree, correctable.

[DUmmie Senator pauses to deeply analyze his navel...]

So is most important "how do we proceed?" No, MOST important is "what do we do about it right now!" And there is a big difference between those 2 phrases.

[Does this mean we need to send out yet another totally useless DUAC alert?]

To illustrate I'll report the fuller context of Mr. Conyers's phrase (above) - "and yes, their lies." There was a well-received question from the audience lamenting that none of the panelists used the word "lied." The point needs to be well taken that we've all been trained to speak (and therefore think) in euphemisms; particularly those who speak publicly. Screaming "imminent conflagration" will not compel a movie house crowd to move to safety.

[That's the ticket. Don't HIDE your insanity. Let it all hang out for everyone to see.]

Former Congresswoman Holtzman illustrated a different failure. She remains convinced that "more information" can solve the problem. When enough people "know," they will rise up. Like many on the left, she refuses to accept the fact that only the "reality-based community" prizes knowledge above belief. We cannot "teach" our way to impeachment.

[You mean like the "reality-based community" of DUmmieland where they BEEEEELEEEEVE that John Kerry will be inaugurated as President on Jan. 20 or that chanting a faux Hopi Indian Prayer will ward off the EVIL REPUBLICANS or that Al Gore is president in the Parallel Universe or buying into the astrological prediction that Bush will soon leave office because the moon is rising in Uranus?]

Mr. Lapham, after reading the Conyers report, has correctly concluded intellectually that there is a "slam dunk" case and that our nation is in peril. Therefore he politely lays the burden to act on the Congress, in their collegial, non-partisan capacity as oath-takers. (Insert your own joke/expletive here.)

[It's a "slam dunk" case that Mr. Lapham's mind is in peril.]

Mr. Rattner is pursuing and recommends a "legal" solution. While it may be helpful to have the regime "found guilty" of some crime in some court, he urged to panel to focus on the most easily provable (already proven?) impeachable offense(s). He has published a cogent, precise brief of only the clearest violations. Thereby giving them less to fight back against?!?

[You might have a chance to have the Bush Regime found guilty in the Extreme Court of Iran.]

And of course the entire evening was peppered to some degree with our usual rationalizations for inaction: "but we'll just get Cheney" -- "we must wait 'till we take the house" -- "what about electoral backlash." Not to mention the lobby talk about futility, being doomed, and confident pronouncements of "never gonna happen."

[A room full of Charlie Browns doomed to have the footballs pulled away from them by a plethora of Lucys.]

So, how do we overcome this -- what do we do right now?

[Type ANGRILY at the keyboard in Mommy's basement!]

Get violent. (Come again?!?) No, not physically violent. Rather intellectually, politically, and rhetorically violent. We are dealing with fascist thugs/cowards and must deal with them and their tactics accordingly. The public and euphemedia must be slapped to attention and our "leaders" and/or the perpetrators must be forced and/or frightened into action and/or surrender.

[Yeah. Somehow our leaders will be cowered into surrendering because the DUmmies soil themselves in angry frustration. That strategy will be sure to work...NOT!]

This violence is in self-defense. These people don't listen to reason. In fact, they pride themselves on their preference for "belief." Labels like theocracy, monarchy, totalitarian, and authoritarian are irrelevant -- it's all some form of fascism; the conviction that some minority has a right to rule the majority. Whether it's based on divine right, a master race, a family dynasty, or a power theory makes absolutely no difference.

[Overlooking the "tiny little" fact that the Republicans have been winning at the ballot boxes which actually makes them the MAJORITY.]

It is Anti-American. And it needs to fought, not managed.

[WAAAAAAH!!! The election results did not turn out the way we wanted so we will fight back by crybabying in rage and soiling our diapers! WAAAAAAH!!!]

We need to make "violent use" of whatever means we have.

[Translation: Violently continue to useslessly tap away at our keyboards.]

For nearly all of us that only means contact with "leaders" (in person, faxing, etc) and the euphemedia (emails, calls, LTTEs).

[DUAC! DUAC!]

For bloggers, that means public assault (not polite differing). Particularly with those whose silence makes them complicit with this ongoing treason. (See democrats.com -- just replicate.)

[Great! Attack the Democrats as well. It's called SELF-DESTRUCTION.]

For those with benefit of a larger megaphone, media-related and political "leaders," that means risking the loss of that megaphone -- shouting the unvarnished truth then turning viciously on those who will (euphemistically) try to dismiss and dillute your message.

[And while acting vicious, try to work up a good head of rabid foam around the mouth to enhance the enraged effect.]

By ALL these means we must ALL do the same things:

We need to banish euphemisms. Period. In fact, we need to employ hyperbole when possible. But since "war crimes," "torture," and "terrorized the nation into war" are merely descriptive, it could be difficult to find hyperbole. We must try our best.

[Translation: Lie like hell if need be.]

The simple fact is that a large segment of the public has been well-trained to ONLY hear such language; and worse to equate such anger/alarm with importance/urgency. Sad? Yes, but we must deal with it as it exists.

["You don't like the fact that we sound like crazed Moonbats? TOUGH LUCK!"]

If you find yourself trying to be polite or subtle, or even just witty, stop it and just be blunt.

[I find DUmmie Senator to be as subtle as a Buffalo Fart.]

The regime DID NOT "sidestep," "ignore," "go around," or "flaunt." They DID NOT "overreach," "cross the line," or "display hubris." They BROKE THE LAW. They VIOLATED SWORN TREATIES. They SHREDDED THE CONSTITUTION. They COMMITTED WAR CRIMES.

[Which do you prefer first? Electro-shock therapy or another Lithium treatment?]

We need to up the ante. Make them an offer they dare not refuse. Threaten. Blackmail. Whatever ugly word you want to put on it.

[Blackmail the EVIL BUSH REGIME!!! Thanx for that revealing bit of HONESTY.]

We must hand over for international prosecution those whose actions have warranted it. The torture and war crimes charges are "above our pay grade." We can expect zero moral standing in the world if we do not abide by the treaties these criminals have violated in our names. Redemption of our National Soul demands nothing less.

[The horrible, horrible torture of the Gitmo prisoners with air conditioning followed by a hearty orange glaze chicken and rice pilaf dinner.]

We will take the money back. Yes, the "tax kickbacks." Yes, the crony contracts. Yes, the not-so-blind trusts. Every penny we can find.

[Tax cuts are now called "tax kickbacks" in DUmmieSpeak as a way of justifying the Bolshevizing of our economy.]

We will reverse ALL acts of this never-legitimate regime. All appointments. All legislation. All Executive Orders. We need to cleanse the social fabric of their contamination.

[Cleanse? I thought you wanted to banish euphemisms. Therefore lets use the REAL words: Purge and Liquidate (kill).]

We must resolve to never stop. We will never "get over it." We must loudly declare that we will have our children take up this challenge if necessary. This will be our legacy.

[Keep typing. The Happy Doc is taking notes on your legacy rant.]

Perhaps the largest applause (save Mr. Conyers intro) was in reaction to the statement that you don't have to still be in office to be impeached. We need to make it clear that this goes beyond election cycles. There is no short term attention span to hide in. We will impeach and convict them posthumously if necessary.

[Translation: You are insane enough to believe that you can retroactively impeach Ronald Reagan.]

This is already true with Bully Bill Rhenquist. We must make clear that ALL crimes against the nation will be accounted for. This includes both stolen elections. The Felonious Five and all other perpetrators of anti-democratic, thereby Anti-American, acts will be accused, tried, and punished. No matter how long it take or how many resources it requires.

[Why not just travel back to the past in a Time Machine and set everything right, errr, left?]

We cannot get lost in "legalisms," "strategies," or our usual "neuroses."

[Translation: Screw the law! We must do whatever it takes to bring down the EVIL BUSH REGIME!!!]

We waste far too much time and effort falling victim to "paralysis by analysis." It is irrelevant at this point what any ultimate impeachment charges may be lodged. ALL crimes and misdemeanors of the regime will need to be brought to bear. From the first Stolen Election to the latest Indian nuclear "free pass" debacle/PR stunt.

[So would misswallowing of a pretzel be an impeachment charge against Bush?]

We must stop worrying about what "they do." Will they change the rules? Will there be backlash? Will they start jailing people? This obsession with the perpetrators is akin to a "battered syndrome." We must really let the chips fall where they may.

[We must stop worry about if we appear to be NUTS!!!]

We must make EVERYTHING about impeachment. Don't be "anti-war," demand impeachment over the "criminal war." Don't be "pro-environment," demand impeachemnt over "defecating on our environment." Don't be "fiscally responsible," demand impeachment for "looting the nation." You get the idea -- don't you "issue wonks?"

[Open your windows, stick your heads out, and scream: "I'M MAD AS HELL AND I WANT IMPEACHMENT NOW!!!"]

That's it. Thanks for reading this far.

[You're welcome...and the meds are on the way.]

Now, let get on with it and FINISH THIS THING.

[I predict you won't even get past the doorway of Mommy's basement.]

There really is no other moral or patriotic option.

[Actually, Rubber Room incarceration is definitely an option here. Now to listen to the DUmmie chorus responding to DUmmie Senator's pathological plea...]

Same as filibuster until we win the House.

[Uh-Oh. A dash of cold water being tossed on DUmmie Senator's pathological plan.]

Taking back the House seems quite possible, but all we need to do now is bring 15 House Rs back over to reality.

[DUmmie Senator defends his plan by proposing that EVIL Republicans will buy his distorted vision of reality. The same envisioned reality that the DUmmies thought would make John Kerry president on Jan. 20, 2005 if they only wished hard enough for it.]

I'm certainly not pulling any punches any longer.

[Did you ever? DUmmies have always been over the edge of reality.]

if you want to hurt these fascists in the deepest recesses, hit them in the pocketbook. withhold your $$. bleed them dry.

[Not One Damn Dime Day.]

The warp and woof of social integration have been shredded. Our sense of interconnectedness unravelled.

[Any common SENSE you ever had has long ago been warped and woofed.]

When we took up the fight to reject Alito, we would have been far more effective if we had focused SOLELY on rejecting the lunacy of a Stalinist unitary authoritarian executive in America. Alito is a co-conspirator in their treasonous effort to nullify our constitution. Confronting the nation with the criminal violations of our laws and our most fundamental constitutional principles would have moved us down the road to impeachment in a way that fighting to save Roe simply cannot do.

[DUmmies think that the MAJORITY senate and president choosing someone they want to become a Supreme Court justice is somehow authoritarian.]

Thanks for highlighting the "Trip to the Hague" This is a point that I think can really resonate, even with the most cynical and apathetic.

[Yeah. Having a foreign court try the President for war crimes will really resonate with the public...in the DUmmie Zone.]

The DC/Euphemedia Analstocracy can try to happy-talk us into Hilary all they want. Unless and until she owns up there will still be conditions in place for another "dean-like" campaign from the outside, supported by the principled base. Actually, true front-runner status is Barbara Boxer's just for the asking.

[Karl Rove has already picked Hillary for you so there is no use bellyaching about that fact.]

And we could reach a tipping point at any time. A point where all our efforts start rolling downhill, energized by the momentum of their moral ascendency. Any one of these new scandals could be the last straw: the ports, the spying, even the Pat Tillman story. We may have broken their grip already. We only see the effects some time after it happens.

[We already know you LOST your grip on reality, DUmmie Senator.]

Find and support real leaders who are after change and for people...Ultimately, my most pressing call to action has been to erect and maintain the first bill board in the US on I-95 that states Be Patriotic Impeach Bush with our Constitution in the background. This has been a lightning rod throughout the blogosphere. Like most things it needs to be an ember that is stoked. A copy of the bill board and Daily Kos diary write up are at: www.carlsheeler.com

[That input came from DUmmie Carl Sheeler, a candidate for Senate from Rhode Island. I hope you win, Carl. The primary that is... HEE! HEE!]

It is time to be truly reasonable and spend our time acting. Even when we don't think anything will work, we must still act when principle demands it.

[If your acting is as good as that of William Shatner's, you're in big trouble. Oh, don't forget to watch "How William Shatner Changed The World" on the History Channel this Sunday. Shatner is taking credit for inspiring the Diebold voting machines.]

I've certainly had enough. I'm ready and willing, sign me up. I am taking individual action and can work in a group also.

[Just as long as it doesn't involve having to tear yourself away from the keyboard. DUAC! DUAC!]

I am almost genetically incapable of euphemism

[However you are definitely genitically incapable of rationality.]

Our only option is to fight them at every turn, and ultimately force Bush, Cheney, and their co-conspirators out of power, and punish them for their crimes.

[Your only option is to seek help now by calling the mental health hotline -- 1-800-BUSH-WON.]

It is long past time for massive... civil disobedience in this country. I'm not talking about 10s of thousands marching, I'm talking about 10s of thousands marching to the White House and having a massive sit-it or chaining themselves to the gates.

[Yeah, lock yourselves to the White House gates and then discover your dilemma a couple of hours later when your bladder and/or bowels come calling for relief.]

The resolution will not be euphemized

[But it WILL be satirized...in the DUmmie FUnnies.]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: 10softhousands; 1800bushwon; advocateoverthrow; antiamericanism; banisheuphemisms; barkingmoonbats; carlsheeler; censureandmoveon; chimpeachment; despots; downhilldummies; du; duacduac; dufu; dummiefunnies; dummies; employhyperbole; euphemediaanalstcrcy; impeachment; johnconyers; kneepadbrigade; lovedclintonswars; moveone; mrconyers; posthumorousimpchmnt; posthumousimpchmnt; presidentcheney; proterrorist; realitybasedcommunty; retroactiveimpchmnt; revolution; roadmaptodemdefeat; rollingdownhill; sedition; sillydems; thehague; tippingpoint; traitors; treason; unamerican; unconstitutional; violenceistheanswer; warpandwoof; wecannot; wemust; weneedto; weweweallthewayhome; wewill; wewont
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I'll be at the big Calle Ocho parade in Miami this Sunday. I wonder if any DUmmie types will have the guts to show up wearing a Che Guevara T-Shirt. Hee! Hee!

Let me know if you want on the DUmmie FUnnies PING List.

1 posted on 03/09/2006 8:05:24 AM PST by PJ-Comix
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To: Xenalyte; RMDupree; AlexW; CzarNicky; Mike Fieschko; motzman; codercpc; thingumbob; tje; ml1954; ...

PING!


2 posted on 03/09/2006 8:06:31 AM PST by PJ-Comix ((Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: PJ-Comix

3rd?!


3 posted on 03/09/2006 8:07:20 AM PST by The_Victor (If all I want is a warm feeling, I should just wet my pants.)
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To: PJ-Comix

Top 10 here.


4 posted on 03/09/2006 8:07:32 AM PST by skimask (Ezekiel: 25/17)
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To: PJ-Comix
DUmmie "genius" Senator wants the DUmmies to act incredibly ANNOYING

And this would be different how?

5 posted on 03/09/2006 8:08:32 AM PST by steve-b (A desire not to butt into other people's business is eighty percent of all human wisdom)
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To: PJ-Comix

top 10?


6 posted on 03/09/2006 8:08:59 AM PST by Talking_Mouse (Indeed I tremble for my country when I reflect that God is just... Thomas Jefferson)
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To: PJ-Comix
I think last night was a milestone. It was so gratifying to see all of our hard work in action outside the beltway...

Poor stupid DUmmies.....it will be a MILLSTONE around your idiotic necks, not a MILESTONE

7 posted on 03/09/2006 8:11:03 AM PST by NRA1995 (If feminists are so smart, why do they need masturbation workshops?)
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To: PJ-Comix

Wahoo #7


8 posted on 03/09/2006 8:11:13 AM PST by skikvt (7th Infantry Division, Buffaloes)
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To: skikvt

Just missed it.


9 posted on 03/09/2006 8:11:59 AM PST by skikvt (7th Infantry Division, Buffaloes)
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To: PJ-Comix
So, how do we overcome this -- what do we do right now?

Seems like the answer to that will probably be "...only ten more dollars...."
10 posted on 03/09/2006 8:13:44 AM PST by stylin19a (Do you still have sex or are you already playing golf?)
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To: PJ-Comix
A point where all our efforts start rolling downhill

LOL! DUmmie efforts (such as they are) have been going downhill from Day One.

11 posted on 03/09/2006 8:13:53 AM PST by steve-b (A desire not to butt into other people's business is eighty percent of all human wisdom)
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To: PJ-Comix
For bloggers, that means public assault (not polite differing).

Ready....

Aim...

Caps lock keys ON.....

12 posted on 03/09/2006 8:17:48 AM PST by The_Victor (If all I want is a warm feeling, I should just wet my pants.)
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To: PJ-Comix

wow.

considering all the real violence the DUmmies used all through the last presidential election cycle, I somehow doubt this Senator DUmmie is speaking of mere harsh language.


13 posted on 03/09/2006 8:18:18 AM PST by King Prout (many accuse me of being overly literal... this would not be a problem if many were not under-precise)
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To: PJ-Comix
We will reverse ALL acts of this never-legitimate regime. All appointments. All legislation. All Executive Orders. We need to cleanse the social fabric of their contamination.

Sounds positively Stalinist. I wonder where they will build the gulags.

14 posted on 03/09/2006 8:19:02 AM PST by Petronski (I love Cyborg!)
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To: PJ-Comix

14?


15 posted on 03/09/2006 8:19:04 AM PST by Blue Eyes (Praying for a miracle.)
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To: King Prout

I got lucky 13
so there
nyagh


16 posted on 03/09/2006 8:19:23 AM PST by King Prout (many accuse me of being overly literal... this would not be a problem if many were not under-precise)
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To: Blue Eyes

Well, 15 will do!


17 posted on 03/09/2006 8:19:30 AM PST by Blue Eyes (Praying for a miracle.)
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To: Petronski

in the Dakotas


18 posted on 03/09/2006 8:20:04 AM PST by King Prout (many accuse me of being overly literal... this would not be a problem if many were not under-precise)
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To: Petronski
Sounds positively Stalinist. I wonder where they will build the gulags.

They want to level the Reagan Presidential Library followed by erasing his pictures from all history books.

19 posted on 03/09/2006 8:20:49 AM PST by PJ-Comix ((Join the DUmmie FUnnies PING List for the FUNNIEST Blog on the Web)
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To: King Prout

DUFU ping!


20 posted on 03/09/2006 8:21:32 AM PST by The Right Stuff
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