Posted on 08/16/2006 1:38:41 PM PDT by PJ-Comix
Remember the movie, It's A Wonderful Life?. In it the James Stewart character was allowed to see how miserable things would have been for his home town if he had never been alive. The DUmmies are now doing just the opposite. They are fantasizing about what a WONDERFUL paradise we would now be living in if only Al Gore had become President in 2001 as you can see in this DUmmie FANTASY titled, "Finish the following sentence... If Al Gore were president..." In the REAL reality, it is like Paradise Lost for the DUmmies. All their frustrations can be traced back to Al Gore LOSING back in 2000 and it has been downhill for them ever since. So let us now indulge their fantasies in Bolshevik Red while the commentary of your humble correspondent, wondering if he would have been on Karenna's dance ticket at the 2000 Gore Inaugural Ball, is in the [brackets]:
Finish the following sentence... If Al Gore were president...
[I'll give it a try as soon as I quit laughing.]
If Al Gore were president, all the US soldiers and Iraqis killed in Bush's Iraq adventure would be alive today. Mind-blowing to think about it, isn't it?
[If Al Gore were president, we would still be debating whether to institute economic sanctions on the Taliban. Mind-blowing to think about it, isn't it?]
911 would not have happened.
[Yeah. The terrorists would have been so humbled by the awesome presence of President Al Gore that the thought of perpetrating 911 would never have occured to them.]
9/11 would NOT have happened.
[Another DUmmie chimes in with the same fantasy.]
No 9-11 scale attack would have happened.
[When it rains DUmmie fantasies, it POURS.]
we would either be driving electric high-breads or Smart cars, ...the nation would be building an intra and interstate mass transit system based on magnetic levitation trains, cold fusion electrical generation would be a reality, the federal debt would be two thirds paid off, America's standard of living would have advanced to almost total elimination of poverty and hunger, America would have a national health care insurance program for everyone and the republican party would have all but disappeared.
[Everybody would be driving around in clean energy hovercraft and the EVIL Republicans would have voluntarily jumped into a giant quicksand pit.]
nothing of the last 5 and 1/2 years would have happened. gutting of or social programs, tax cuts wouldn't have happened, at least until the debt was paid off and it would have under the policies of an Al Gore Administration. the only problem with all this is I have to come back to reality and face the music of now.
[Tax cuts wouldn't have happened. Taxes would have been RAISED. Isn't that just wuuuunderful!!!]
Life would be wonderful!!! I wouldn't have to apologize to my grandkids for the horrid world I'm leaving them, and we wouldn't be banging our heads against the wall at all the incredible events that we have before us, today. Just think of all the citizens of the world who would still be living.
[Life would be wuuuuunnnnnderful!!! Even our doo-doo wouldn't stink!]
. . . . the Kyoto Accord would be seen as the first step . . . toward a solution to global warning.
[The Kyoto Accord would have limited the hot air emissions from Al Gore's mouth.]
I would be looking into earning a Bachelor's Degree after I get my Associate's Degree. I would have the confidence that I could possibly get a damn job after graduating AND continue my education.
[I wouldn't be drooling like a moronic loser blaming his personal failures on Bush.]
If Al Gore was president, I would be able to use the Pell Grant and probably other educational incentives to become a teacher (community college, not K-12) or anything else I wanted to become. As it stands now, I'll be lucky to get a 2 year degree at all, much less try for a 4 year degree. And I'll be lucky if I can find a damn job at all.
[As it is now, you'll be lucky to cross a street without drenching yourself in self-pitying drool.]
My House Wouldn't Be So Filthy
[And your body odor would be tolerable.]
The angels would not be weeping.
[The Jason Leopolds would not be leaping.]
...I would be sleeping better at night.
[Your constipation would be cured.]
Many of my friends and fellow citizens would still be alive in New Orleans
[Katrina would have swerved away from the Gulf Coast under a President Al Gore.]
The whole world would be a better place!
[The WHOLE UNIVERSE would be just hunky-dory!]
Social Security would be in a lock box safe from the pork stained hands of the Bushites.
[Would prosthetic crotch enhancers also be in that lock box?]
the after affects of the whore Katrina wouldnt have existed. Period.
[Katrina wouldn't have even existed. Period.]
California and the rest of the west wouldn't keep burning every year. We would have had systems installed to contain the fires or strips of land converted to be used as fire breaks or both.
[There would have been automatic sprinkler systems in the middle of the wilderness and FREE gumdrops for all!]
If Bush's "gutting of or social programs" "guts" anymore, the budget will soar by billions.
Gutting??? How is increasing social spending by 40% "GUTTING"?!?!?!?!
After 5 years under George W. Bush, social spending has continued on its pre-Bush pace in a $2.7 trillion dollar budget, and is forecasted to reach nearly 70 cents of every federal dollar spent by 2011. Interestingly, though, for every dollar increase in defense under Bush, there has been a $2.15 increase in socail spending. And if you look at the graph, the rate of growth of that social spending was already established before Bush even took office.
Source (with chart):http://getsgreased.blogspot.com/2006/03/social-spending-on-path-to-bankrupt.html
GUTTING?!?!?!?!
If I croak of a heart attack tonight, you folks will at least know why, even if my family doesn't...
I heard he got he a teddie for mother's day.
If algore were President we would be approaching 20% Unemployment.
Pray for W and Our Troops
Shalom Israel
You're welcome. Please spread it around.
We'd have someone in the Oval Office who really knows how to look super-cereal...
We'd have more smug alerts where it would be mandatory to drive our high-breads and Smart cars.
We'd have more press conferences, with guest speakers.
We wouldn't have had Agent Orange....
....but we would have had MORE of the Former First Fuglies than we have even NOW!
But we are intrepid FReepers, and we take Constitutional solace in the conjecture that if he was really elected in 2000, he'd be at his term limit now!
Mrs. Fuglie, having declared her co-presidency early in the "dark ages," is at the her limit, too!
They would either deny it outright, or say it's Bush's fault. (In which case, they would be right, for once. Even a blind squirrel finds an acorn now and then....)
"Forget it....He's rolling..."
(For all you "Animal House" fans out there)
I believe there would be world peace and a victory over terrorism before ANY Dummie believes in (c)....
Somehow, "DUmmies" and "The Rapture" just doesn't belong on the same page, let alone the same sentence....
...Then construction on all those Haliburton "re-education and interment" camps would have to be canceled....or turned over to the Occidental Petroleum Company and renamed "interment and re-education" camps...
When I got to the reference of "magnetic levitation trains," I figured this had to be a FReeper troll. I also have to wonder where all these projects were during the eight years prior to 2000?
Not to worry. The Great and Powerful Gore will provide your heat! No problem too tough, no request to great! He can solve ALL the world's troubles! He is ALGORE!
(Yes, I AM joking....)
ROTFLMAO
We'd still be talking about going into Afghanistan to get Osama...Richard Reid would have taken himself and everyone else aboard that flight to Miami straight to the bottom of the Atlantic...and Algore would be holding "Townhall Meetings" across the country to help people understand how we brought 9/11 on ourselves.
Oh and 10 planes would have been blown to bits on their way to the U.S. from England today.
That's Right...they would have scaled it back a bit...Uh-Huh...Right...
... every kid would have a puppy and we'd all eat candy and chocolate ice cream for dinner.
Sheesh.
I can't even begin to address the idiocy of the DUmmies on this one.
Translation: It's Bush's Fault™ that I'm so dumb I can't even pass high-school math in community college.
Bush's Fault!
= 
Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.