The Chili Cook-Off Story - Hilarious!

Interesting E-mail Forwards ^ | 04 06 09 | Nick

[Notoriously Conservative]

Frank: "Recently, I was honored to be selected as a judge at a chile cook-off. The original person called in sick at the last moment, and I happened to be standing there at the judge's table, asking for directions to the Coors Light truck, when the call came in. I was assured by the other two judges (Native New Mexicans) that the chili wouldn't be all that spicy; and, besides, they told me I could have free beer during the tasting, so I accepted and became Judge 3."

Here are the scorecard notes from the event:

CHILE # 1 - MIKE'S MANIAC MONSTER CHILE

Judge # 1 -- A little too heavy on the tomato. Amusing kick. Judge # 2 -- Nice, smooth tomato flavor. Very mild. Judge # 3 (Frank) -- Holy crap, what the hell is this stuff? You could remove dried paint from your driveway. Took me two beers to put the flames out. I hope that's the worst one. These New Mexicans are crazy.

CHILE # 2 - EL RANCHO'S AFTERBURNER CHILE

Judge # 1 -- Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight jalapeno tang. Judge # 2 -- Exciting BBQ flavor, needs more peppers to be taken seriously. Judge # 3 -- Keep this out of the reach of children. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people who wanted to give me the Heimlich maneuver. They had to rush in more beer when they saw the look on my face.

[DuncanWaring]

Ping.

[thefactor]

you will cry from this email. in a good way.

[Edgar3]

I’ve had this on my hot sauce site for years. It is timeless!

[Kimmers]

Thank you for the much needed LOL

[kimmie7]

One of my all-time favorites.

[WhyisaTexasgirlinPA]

I’ve been to chili cookoffs.... almost every word of this is true - except they offer fruit between entries. Fruit and chili - not really a good combo. I think they should have offered frozen crackers.

[philly-d-kidder]

Iamagine the day after!!!!

[grey_whiskers]

From elsewhere on the same page:

Click the link.

Cheers!

[AirForceMom]

Next time I come in contact with a snow cone, people will be staring at me..I’ll be lmfao.

[philly-d-kidder]

Cucumber for Cooling effect!! or watermelon

[STARWISE]

I’m CRYING, I’m laughing so hard.

Thank you ........ I needed that !!

[Arrowhead1952]

I’ve been to chili cookoffs.... almost every word of this is true

Hey gal! If you really want to make someone (not your friends) have a bad time, tell them to drink a cold Coke or Pepsi after eating hot chili.

[Mr_Moonlight]

~~~ PING ~~~

[Candor7]

"My intestines are now a straight pipe filled with gaseous, sulfuric flames. I crapped on myself when I farted, and I'm worried it will eat through the chair. No one seems inclined to stand behind me except that Sally. Can't feel my lips anymore. I need to wipe my butt with a snow cone."

Reminds me of summers in Baja.

[sima_yi]

The comments from "Judge #3" remind me of a dish I had when I lived in Indonesia.

It was described as stir-fried beef and peppers. I don't know what kind of peppers they were, but when I bit into one, it felt like someone poured molten steel into my mouth. It was so hot I literally went blind for probably thirty seconds. I have never tasted anything so hot before or since.

It was absolutely delicious! I've been hooked on Indonesian food ever since.

[patton]

LOL!

[Ditter]

Imagine the day after>>>>

I thought I was the only one! LOL!

[RebelTex]

Pinging my humor ping list - freepmail me if you want on or off this list.
(This is usually a low volume ping, as I don’t search for humor threads, but I do ping when I find something really funny.)

[Pharmboy]

Very funny and well-done...good ping.