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DUmmie FUnnies 09-29-11 ("'Progressive'? No: I'm a [Blank]ing LIBERAL!")
DUmmie FUnnies ^ | September 29, 2011 | DUmmie Hoosier Daddy, DUmmies, and Chrles Henrickson

Posted on 09/29/2011 11:10:10 AM PDT by Charles Henrickson

Our poster boy, Wee Willie Pitt, models a shirt that could easily be worn by our DUFU OP today, DUmmie Hoosier Daddy. For DUmmie Hoosier Daddy has posted this THREAD, "'Progressive'? No: I'm a F***ing LIBERAL!" Notice, by the way, that I had to put asterisks on both Pitt's shirt and Hoosier Daddy's thread title. I have a feeling my asterisk key is going to get a heavy workout in this DUFU.

The DUmmies are ANGRY, d*mmit! They are no wimpy "Progressives"! Ptoo! on that! No, the DUmmies are LIBERALS, F***ING LIBERALS, and proud of it!

But before we get to the thread, let us sing this ode to the angry DUmmie:

THAT'S A DUMMIE
Tune: "That's Amore"

When the Moonbats go wild
With the sh*t that they've piled,
That's a DUmmie.
When they've plain lost their heads
Like they've gone off their meds,
That's a DUmmie.

Hopes will fly,
Soaring to the sky, rising way up high
Like a giant sequoia.
Hands will wring--
What a ding-a-ling, what a ding-a-ling--
And you'll think, "Paranoia."

When the "F" words flow free
Just like on MTV,
That's a DUmmie.
When they march in the street
Without leaving their seat,
You're in luck:

Those aren't Rovian plants,
They're just Ants in their rants,
And they're FUnnie!
For a laugh and a half
Reading each paragraph--
That's a DUmmie!

So let us now enter the angry land of the Looney Left, in Bolshevik Red, while the commentary of your humble guest correspondent, the wag tailoring the doggerel, Charles Henrickson, who OD'ed on a most exciting night of baseball last night, is in the [brackets]:

"Progressive"? No: I'm a F***ing LIBERAL!

[I SPIT on your wussy "progressive"!]

We have allowed the g*dd*m wingnuts to define us for far too long! Are any of them backing off "conservative"? Hell no! They embrace and celebrate it! "Liberal" is NOT a dirty word. . . .

[And even if it is, DUmmies LOVE dirty words!]

I am sick and F***ING tired of this habit of ours to abandon labels we OUGHT TO BE PROUD OF in the hope Middle America will agree with us. Well guess what? Middle America already agrees with us! WE ARE THE F***ING MAJORITY!!!!!

[OK then, go with that! That's the winning approach! PLEASE bill your candidates as "liberals"--say it loud, say it proud!--and be sure to include all the "F" words! Puh-leeze!]

[THANK you, DUmmie Hoosier Daddy, for that brilliant strategy! Now let's go to your fellow f***ing liberals . . .]

I have made up my mind. . . .

[I'm surprised you were able to find one.]

Righteous!

[Right on! Power to the people!]

i had it out with my brother yesterday over this. He says liberal like he's smelling poo. I told him to stuff it, I'm a F***ING LIBERAL and you and your side can stuff it up your ass.

[Embrace the poo!]

I"M A F***ING LIBERAL! GET OVER IT!

[Bumper sticker material there. Thank you, Dale Carnegie.]

The name says it all.

[Indeed. In fact, you've given me an idea. Let's RENAME the Democrat Party and give it with a more accurate, more winning name! Say hello to . . . THE F***ING LIBERAL PARTY!]

I'm a Flaming Bleeding-Heart Knee-Jerk Liberal and proud of it!

[You left out "F***ing." What are you, some kind of a wimp??]

I'm a radical liberal and I will never be a pastel cosmeticized "progressive."

[Yes to Radical Red, no to Pastel Prog!]

We HAVE to bring the Fire in Belly!

[Get in my belly!]

I am a radical far left liberal and have been since before I was born.

[I Was a Fetal F***ing Liberal!]

a f***ing LIBERAL... or a F***ING liberal! I'll take either.

[DUmmie dana_b and the Case of the F***ING LIBERAL.]

Hey, I have two kids. F***ing liberal has a double meaning for me! Uh, by which I mean... That children are the result of f***ing.

[Unless you're a F***ing Aborting Liberal.]

They aren't about conserving sh*t.

[We f***ing liberals are! We EMBRACE the poo!]

"Liberal?" No: I'm a F***ing Socialist!

[Yes! Go with THAT! I SPIT on your wimpy "Liberal"! WE ARE THE F***ING SOCIALISTS!]

Socialist? I'm a Communist. I'd like to see someone top that.

[DOWN with your stinkin' "Socialist"! PTOO! YECCH! WE ARE THE F***ING COMMUNISTS!!!]


TOPICS: Humor
KEYWORDS: dufu; dummie; dummiefunnies; dummies
Socialist? I'm a Communist.

FINALLY, an honest DUmmie!

1 posted on 09/29/2011 11:10:19 AM PDT by Charles Henrickson
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To: Charles Henrickson

NB4P


2 posted on 09/29/2011 11:11:50 AM PDT by The_Victor (If all I want is a warm feeling, I should just wet my pants.)
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To: Charles Henrickson

IBTP? :)


3 posted on 09/29/2011 11:12:12 AM PDT by comet13 (Life is but a walking shadow....)
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To: Charles Henrickson

But he doesn’t get a Kewpie Doll for admitting to being a Communist.


4 posted on 09/29/2011 11:12:55 AM PDT by Darksheare (You will never defeat Bok Choy!)
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To: Charles Henrickson

Don’t you love how they embrace labels that label them social outcasts and pariahs and if those titles were embraced by their candidates of choice they’d never win a dog catcher election?

Top 10


5 posted on 09/29/2011 11:13:50 AM PDT by PittsburghAfterDark
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To: Charles Henrickson
They (his kids) aren't about conserving sh*t.

Yeah, like the Republic.

6 posted on 09/29/2011 11:15:07 AM PDT by GreenAccord (Bacon Akbar)
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To: PJ-Comix; Xenalyte; RMDupree; AlexW; CzarNicky; Mike Fieschko; motzman; codercpc; thingumbob; ...
PING!


7 posted on 09/29/2011 11:15:22 AM PDT by Charles Henrickson (Embrace the poo!)
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To: Charles Henrickson

They come in all flavors, but the most accurate term is statist. Covers the lot of them.


8 posted on 09/29/2011 11:17:15 AM PDT by dead (I've got my eye out for Mullah Omar.)
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To: Charles Henrickson

That’s some funny POO!


9 posted on 09/29/2011 11:18:36 AM PDT by houeto
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To: Charles Henrickson
Hey, I have two kids. F***ing liberal has a double meaning for me! Uh, by which I mean... That children are the result of f***ing.

Science!

His college professors must be so proud of all the knowledge he retained.

10 posted on 09/29/2011 11:21:18 AM PDT by dead (I've got my eye out for Mullah Omar.)
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To: Charles Henrickson
Socialist? I'm a Communist. I'd like to see someone top that.

Communist? I'm an armed robber. I don't need any ****ing ideological cover to justify my shooting you in the head and taking your stuff.

What's funny is that the word "liberal" itself was a cover to make it appear that socialists were interested in freedom.

11 posted on 09/29/2011 11:22:17 AM PDT by KarlInOhio (Compare "Delay is preferable to error" - Thomas Jefferson // "Pass this bill now!" - Barack Obama)
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To: Charles Henrickson

I saw Pitt [pretty sure it was him] in Bukowki`s a few weeks back. He kept looking around like he expected autograph seekers to swarm him, but he only had one guy with him yapping away. I was the only conservative in my group and said `Isn`t that William Rivers Pitt???` None of the very vocal liberals with me knew the name.


12 posted on 09/29/2011 11:28:39 AM PDT by Darkwolf377 (undecided)
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To: Charles Henrickson

Freaking Commies!


13 posted on 09/29/2011 11:33:30 AM PDT by GeronL (The Right to Life came before the Right to Happiness)
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To: Charles Henrickson
An indication of how far left the Dummies are is that many actually regard Obama as being right of center. They're calling the most radical leftist Dem pol ever elected a right-winger. Now that's really on the far left edge.

Also, I'm more and more convinced many Dummies post messages just so they can use the F word. A lot like the fat, ugly wretches campaigning for public nudity in S.F. saying it's about freedom of expression when basically they're just screwball exhibitionists.

14 posted on 09/29/2011 11:36:23 AM PDT by driftless2
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To: Darkwolf377

I am glad Pitt’s BoSox bit the DUst. Hey, BoSox: It gets better!


15 posted on 09/29/2011 11:40:49 AM PDT by Charles Henrickson (Embrace the poo!)
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To: Darkwolf377
I saw Pitt [pretty sure it was him] in Bukowki`s a few weeks back. He kept looking around like he expected autograph seekers to swarm him, but he only had one guy with him yapping away. I was the only conservative in my group and said `Isn`t that William Rivers Pitt???` None of the very vocal liberals with me knew the name.

Fame is a fickle mistress...even moreso when she is rented by the hour.
16 posted on 09/29/2011 11:41:55 AM PDT by Army Air Corps (Four fried chickens and a coke)
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To: Charles Henrickson
WE ARE THE F***ING MAJORITY!!!!!

[OK then, go with that! That's the winning approach! PLEASE bill your candidates as "liberals"-- . . ]

Majority? How did that work out for you DUmmies in 2010?


Socialist? I'm a Communist.

FINALLY, an honest DUmmie!

Bragging rights for the commie in the WH?

17 posted on 09/29/2011 11:49:44 AM PDT by Arrowhead1952 (Dear God, thanks for the rain, but please let it rain more in Texas. Amen.)
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To: driftless2

every other word out of their mouths is a curse word because only idjits would use real words. They probably think it makes them look smart or something.


18 posted on 09/29/2011 11:53:49 AM PDT by GeronL (The Right to Life came before the Right to Happiness)
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To: Charles Henrickson

Wow..things are looking so poor for these whack jobs that they have to give themselves pep talks about their own ideology?


19 posted on 09/29/2011 11:54:30 AM PDT by Skip Ripley
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To: Charles Henrickson

Wow..things are looking so poor for these whack jobs that they have to give themselves pep talks about their own ideology?


20 posted on 09/29/2011 11:55:16 AM PDT by Skip Ripley
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To: PJ-Comix; All
I think DU needs to rebrand itself:

F***ING LIBERAL
UNDERGROUND.COM

FLU: It's going viral.
Catch the FLU, F***ing Liberal Underground!

21 posted on 09/29/2011 12:04:56 PM PDT by Charles Henrickson (Catch the FLU, F***ing Liberal Underground!)
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To: Charles Henrickson
So many F-bombs in this thread... sheesh. Btw, I really liked that song you wrote in the start of the thread. lol!


Liberal?" No: I'm a F***ing Socialist!

I'm Shocked!!! /s

22 posted on 09/29/2011 12:16:33 PM PDT by DeoVindiceSicSemperTyrannis (L'shanah Tovah Tikatevu!)
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To: Charles Henrickson

Really, how would the trash speak if civilized Americans adopted—embraced—the F-bomb and stripped it of its cache? What would be the new F-bomb?

Seriously, there was a mother shopping with her teens the other day in front of me in the checkout. Her very wide t-shirt said “F***ing classy” Out loud I said, “Wow, your shirt just says it like it is.” She continued to text and one of the teens looked at me uncomfortably. Poor kid.


23 posted on 09/29/2011 12:21:18 PM PDT by NYpeanut
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To: Charles Henrickson
I am a radical far left liberal and have been since before I was born.

Aren't you glad your mommy wasn't? If she had been, you would have been sucked out of her womb and tossed out in a trash bag.

24 posted on 09/29/2011 12:32:04 PM PDT by MEGoody (Ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.)
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To: Darkwolf377

At first I thought he would be great to hang around with to get girls as anyone near him would look good by comparison. But I then realized that most women would wonder why a person is hanging around such a loser and avoid both of them.


25 posted on 09/29/2011 12:33:07 PM PDT by Hillarys Gate Cult (Those who trade land for peace will end up with neither one.)
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To: MEGoody
I always shut libs up with the point that if their mother believed in abortion as much as they do then we wouldn't be having this conversation. I would be there but they would have never been born.
26 posted on 09/29/2011 12:36:19 PM PDT by Hillarys Gate Cult (Those who trade land for peace will end up with neither one.)
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To: Charles Henrickson
I am a radical far left liberal and have been since before I was born.

Interesting, coming from one who approves abortion...

27 posted on 09/29/2011 12:42:37 PM PDT by bcsco (Take a Cain - and cure the Pain!)
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To: Charles Henrickson
I am a radical far left liberal and have been since before I was born.

There's an extremely ironic "radical far left" abortion joke in here.

28 posted on 09/29/2011 12:46:10 PM PDT by Future Snake Eater (Don't stop. Keep moving!)
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Didn’t they ditch the word liberal after the stench coming off it became too bad and attempt to rebrand as “progressive”?


29 posted on 09/29/2011 12:51:26 PM PDT by Hayride
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To: Charles Henrickson

“I’m a Flaming Bleeding-Heart Knee-Jerk Liberal and proud of it!”

Well as long as you can force me to fund your pride, as soon as I push back then you get all huffy.


30 posted on 09/29/2011 1:01:46 PM PDT by CSM (Keeper of the "Dave Ramsey Fan" ping list. FReepmail me if you want your beeber stuned.)
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To: Charles Henrickson

Yeah, well I’m a classical liberal, so he’s got ****, and I’ve got class.


31 posted on 09/29/2011 1:02:21 PM PDT by Jack of all Trades (Hold your face to the light, even though for the moment you do not see.)
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To: Charles Henrickson
Hey, I have two kids. F***ing liberal has a double meaning for me! Uh, by which I mean... That children are the result of f***ing.

If they survive the "choice".

32 posted on 09/29/2011 1:07:10 PM PDT by denydenydeny (The moment you step into a world of facts, you step into a world of limits. --Chesterton)
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To: Charles Henrickson
Ok, I have to take a moment to mention that my DUmmy mole account has passed the 400 post mark!

This amazing since my first foray into DUmmyland only lasted about 20 posts. I've given serious thought into writing the unofficial DUmmie guide to covert DU operations. An ambitious project for sure.

Here is a pointer for the potential freeper wanting to have a clandestine DUmmy account. Pick a screen name that doesn't match your real gender.

33 posted on 09/29/2011 1:29:11 PM PDT by fatboy (This protestant will have no part in the ecumenical movement)
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To: Charles Henrickson

I am a radical far left liberal and have been since before I was born.

[I Was a Fetal F***ing Liberal!]


Since before he was born, he says. Soooo...as a fetus he was a radical far left liberal? How is that possible?
I thought they didn’t believe that a fetus was alive? Is this DUmmie wandering off the reservation?

Tombstone in 5....4....


34 posted on 09/29/2011 1:42:26 PM PDT by Personal Responsibility (Cain 2012!)
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To: Charles Henrickson

35 posted on 09/29/2011 1:47:35 PM PDT by VeniVidiVici ("Si, se gimme!")
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To: Charles Henrickson

Love ya, CH, but how could you corrupt one of Deano’s best tunes??!!


36 posted on 09/29/2011 1:59:04 PM PDT by jla (Who says Perry's a conservative? - Rush, Sarah, & Levin do.)
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To: Charles Henrickson

Speaking of marching in the street without leaving their seats:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=439x2022891

This Occupy Wall Street nonsense is hilarious.


37 posted on 09/29/2011 2:19:11 PM PDT by Choose Ye This Day (Insanity runs in my family. It practically gallops. -- Mortimer Brewster)
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To: CSM

“Well as long as you can force me to fund your pride, as soon as I push back then you get all huffy”

That’s it in a nutshell. Very giving people of other peoples hard earned money


38 posted on 09/29/2011 2:38:27 PM PDT by Figment ("A communist is someone who reads Marx.An anti-communist is someone who understands Marx" R Reagan)
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To: Charles Henrickson

“Socialist? I’m a Communist. I’d like to see someone top that.”
_______________________________________________

Most of these DUmmmie kids are too young to know what Communism was like in central/east Europe.

Having lived in central Europe for almost ten years, I saw the scars, as well as a point on the Danube where a number people were shot as they tried to swim to freedom in Austria, on the other side.
The old building with three gun-ramps is still there.

There is one good story of a Slovak family that made it over the river one night in a homemade hot air balloon.


39 posted on 09/29/2011 3:35:21 PM PDT by AlexW
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To: Charles Henrickson; Darkwolf377
I am glad Pitt’s BoSox bit the DUst. Hey, BoSox: It gets better!

Ouch! Some of like the Sox. However, the whole organization needs to take the advice from Jack Nicholson's Batman...

"This town needs an enema!"
40 posted on 09/29/2011 4:30:56 PM PDT by GQuagmire ('Don't Piss The Lady Off')
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To: Darkwolf377
I saw Pitt [pretty sure it was him] in Bukowki`s a few weeks back. He kept looking around like he expected autograph seekers to swarm him, but he only had one guy with him yapping away.

Maybe he was checking to see if Kevin Spacey was coming back in.

BTW, you should print out a pic of li'l Beaver and take it with you the next time you go to Bukowski's and ask Pitt to autograph it.

41 posted on 09/29/2011 5:44:35 PM PDT by PJ-Comix (The Overseer shall promulgate rules for party conduct)
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To: Charles Henrickson

Maybe he should get the Kewpie Doll for being the only HOnest DUmmie! :)


42 posted on 09/29/2011 6:25:35 PM PDT by LUV W (The current candidates?...none of them are pushing MY buttons! RUN SARAH....R U N!!!!)
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To: Charles Henrickson

You’re GOOD! LOL!

FLU it is! :) a-choo!


43 posted on 09/29/2011 6:35:31 PM PDT by LUV W (The current candidates?...none of them are pushing MY buttons! RUN SARAH....R U N!!!!)
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To: Hillarys Gate Cult; Charles Henrickson
At first I thought he would be great to hang around with to get girls

Didn't seem to be working for the George Romero character he was with. We were there for an hour and NO ONE ELSE talked to him, at least the times I was looking over. He really is a pasty, chubby type who looks like he sits in the basement playing that Warcraft game. Most of the Bukowski's crowd that night seemed to be young Cambridge yuppie types, and a few college kids huddled around the round tables with the high-chairs around them.

I'm not a drinker but I've spent a large part of my life in bars, and that place just had Wannabe written all over it. I think Cambridge types go in there thinking it's gonna be a walk on the wild side. I guess to them, being 'wild' means keeping your rental DVDs an extra night, because that place just did nothing for me. After all these years of living in and around Cambridge, and then reading here that Pitt hangs there, it was pretty lame. I guess if Starbucks is the new corner bar, this kind of place is the living end.

44 posted on 09/29/2011 11:35:08 PM PDT by Darkwolf377 (undecided)
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To: Charles Henrickson

Third party time. The Liberal Party, woo hoo.


45 posted on 09/30/2011 8:28:51 PM PDT by arrogantsob (Why do They hate her so much?)
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To: Charles Henrickson

that’s actually a VERY instructive thread. “Progressive” is actually more accurate, “liberal” in the historical sense being closer to what “libertarian” or even “conservative” mean in the contemporary sense. Then you have their oneupsmanship of progressive to liberal to socialist to communist that shows the actual progression of those belief systems. Throw that in with their childishness and ignorance, and we might have the quintessential Dummie thread. It’s at least a very good one.


46 posted on 10/01/2011 9:18:20 AM PDT by cdcdawg
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