Mark Steyn: Fauxcahontas and the melting pot

OCregister ^ | 5-4-12 | Mark Steyn

[radioone]

Have you dated a composite woman? They're America's hottest new demographic. As with all the really cool stuff, Barack Obama was doing it years before the rest of us. In "Dreams from My Father," the world's all-time most-unread bestseller, he spills the inside dope on his composite white girlfriend:

"When we got back to the car she started crying. She couldn't be black, she said. She would if she could, but she couldn't. She could only be herself, and wasn't that enough..."

[al baby]

Does a rubber woman count ?

[Jay Santos CP]

Martin Luther King dreamed of a day when men would be judged not on the color of their skin but on the content of their great-great-great-grandmother’s wedding license application. And now it’s here! - Mr. Steyn

The guy is awesome.

[Michael.SF.]

"FAUXCAHONTAS"

Now that is hilarious!

[Paladin2]

heh, heh, heh, Mark said “jackanapes”, heh, heh, heh....

[kabar]

Absolutely an instant classic. Thanks for posting.

[upchuck]

Alas, the actual original marriage license does not list Great-Great-Great-Gran'ma as Cherokee, but let's cut Elizabeth Fauxcahontas Crockagawea Warren some slack here.

OMG, that's hilarious!

[Dr. Sivana]

Hallelujah! In the old racist America, we had quadroons and octoroons. But in the new post-racial America, we have – hang on, let me get out my calculator – duoettrigintaroons!

Mark Steyn is brilliant.

[Aevery_Freeman]

Elizabeth Fauxcahontas Crockagawea Warren

I don't care who you are, that thar' is funny!

[WilliamofCarmichael]

"When we got back to the car she started crying. She couldn't be black, she said. She would if she could, but she couldn't. She could only be herself, and wasn't that enough..."

So Obama suggested that she mug that white girl over by the entrance to the restaurant and he'd be the judge . . . .

[Joe 6-pack]

ROTFLMAO at “Harvard Lore School”!

[Earthdweller]

[SERKIT]

Bill Ayers may have use the term “composite”, but didn't Barack the Great use the term “compressed” to describe his various fictitious girlfriends? I think the concept of “compressed” is more like the waitress sandwich utilized by Kennedy-Dodd.

[Salgak]

And, of course, her “Heap Big Chief” in DC, Spinning Bull. . .

[GotMojo]

Elizabeth “Dances with Baloney” Warren.......

[Venturer]

Tell me Rush isn’t powerful.

One day he asks where are Obama’s girlfriends, and (bang) out of the blue one jumps up and shout’s Right Chere mate.

I ‘ve been in the outback for the last 20 years.Just heard you were looking for me.

[vbmoneyspender]

George Zimmerman, redneck; Elizabeth Warren, redskin.

LOL

[sjmjax]

The "sandwich" concept involves real women.

I'm thinking more along the lines of "cardboard cutout".

[Reverend Wright]

“..George Zimmerman, redneck; Elizabeth Warren, redskin. Under the Third Reich’s Nuremberg Laws, Ms. Warren would have been classified as Aryan and Mr. Zimmerman as non-Aryan. Now it’s the other way round. Progress!...”

Mark Steyn should get the Columnist Pulitzer just for that paragraph alone.

[LtKerst]

Who was that college Turd sniffer? the one who posed with his long hair and a berrett trying to look like some mutt
holding an assault rifle? fresh from wounded knee?

that Phony white guy who claimed He was an Indian?

[sima_yi]

Would that be Ward Churchill? From University of Colorado (Boulder)?

[Travis McGee]

Ayers created the “composite girlfriend” but Obama (the law review editor who never wrote for the law review) couldn’t remember the correct word.

It’s Maldives/Malvinas, or 57 states all over. Compressed, composite, what’s the difference?

Kinda, like, mashed t’gether, ya know?

[chuckee]

Sandra Fluke’s take on the matter is that maybe Warren was not able to score a luncheon with another Indian but at least Harvard Law insures her for free birth control pills as a consolation if she got lucky with another Indian

[rdcbn]

As much as I love to give people the benefit of the doubt, Warren's great, great, great grandmother was named Sara Smith, not exactly a common Indian name and one more in line someone of English decent.

It's more likely that Sara was the daughter of an English man and a Cherokee mother (not uncommon in those days), which would make Warren 1/64 Cherokee, not 1/32 Cherokee as she claims and it would be her great, great, great, great grandmother who was an Indian.

At 1/64th Cherokee, it is not obvious that there is any practical difference between Warren claiming to be Indian based on her almost non existent Cherokee ancestry to qualify for affirmative action and whether she just lied and made the whole thing up to run an affirmative action scam.

The same could probably be said about her original claim of being 1/32th Cherokee

[PghBaldy]

There are some people who think they are smarter than they are who use words like “compressed,” when they mean to use “composite.” Obama is a doofus, in other words.

[Snickering Hound]

She must be related to the other blonde Indian, "Dances with Metal Pole" last seen at firewater teepee by airport.

[pierrem15]

As Steyn put it:

Elizabeth Fauxcahontas Crockagawea Warren

I've got tears coming out my eyes I've been laughing so hard.

[BerryDingle]

Harold J. Smith was better known by his stage name Jay Silverheels.

[SuziQ]

Another brilliant gem from Mr. Steyn!

[Verginius Rufus]

I had a distant cousin of Scots-Irish ancestry who married a Cherokee woman and accompanied her and their children to the Indian Territory on the Trail of Tears. I have found some of their descendants in the published records as late as 1907. Some of them spoke only Cherokee--but had a Scots-Irish surname.

I don't know how genuine this great-great-great-grandmother of Elizabeth Warren is, but as you say she could be less than full-blooded Cherokee (whether half and half, or three-quarters Cherokee and one quarter white, or the reverse).

If this is Fauxcohontas' maternal grandmother's maternal grandmother's mother then she would have inherited her mitochondrial DNA from her. Otherwise it's likely that she has little or no genetic material from her putative Cherokee ancestors. (32 ancestors that many generations back, and 46 chromosomes--so may have one or two chromosomes from that ancestor but maybe none.)

[wildbill]

Aren’t you glad Mark Steyn exists and is on our side?

I can’t think of a single leftwing writer with satiric wit that can produce political humor that simply skewers their target.

[PMAS]

*

[csmusaret]

[x]

George Zimmerman, the son of a Peruvian mestiza, is the embodiment of endemic white racism and the reincarnation of Bull Connor, but Elizabeth Warren, the great-great-great-granddaughter of someone who might possibly have been listed as Cherokee on an application for a marriage license, is a heartwarming testimony to how minorities are shattering the glass ceiling in Harvard Yard.

Good point, but I don't know about the language. If I remember right, in some countries mestizo/mestiza refered only to those who were part Native and part European in ancestry and other words refered to those with other racial blends or mixtures, while in other countries it was the term for all people of mixed ancestry.

[Rummyfan]

Alas, the actual original marriage license does not list Great-Great-Great-Gran'ma as Cherokee, but let's cut Elizabeth Fauxcahontas Crockagawea Warren some slack here. She couldn't be black. She would if she could, but she couldn't. But she could be 1/32nd Cherokee, and maybe get invited to a luncheon with others of her kind – "people who are like I am," 31/32nds white – and they can all sit around celebrating their diversity together. She is a testament to America's melting pot, composite pot, composting pot, whatever.

[decal]

Normally, you can point to a sentence in a Steyn column and say,”Here, HERE is the money quote!”

This one doesn't have one - they're ALL money quotes!

[P.O.E.]

Hekawi not fighters! Hekawi lovers!