Skip to comments.Detroit Ruins Draw Tourists to City
Posted on 12/27/2013 8:52:40 PM PST by John Semmens
Detroits decline into bankruptcy and decay seems to have boosted its desirability as a sight for tourists to visit. Howard Carter, a recent visitor to the Citys ruins, was quite enthusiastic, Its like seeing the pyramids without having to wait thousands of years for them to turn into ruins.
Carter congratulated himself on his good fortune. Instead of having to pay thousands of dollars to take the family to Egypt we were all able to hop in the car and drive over from Canton, Carter boasted. At most were out a few hundred bucks instead of the thousands an overseas trip wouldve cost us. And every dollar we spent stayed in the US helping to boost our own economy.
Locals are even giving guided tours. We paid a guy $50 bucks for a three-hour tour, Carter said. In addition to describing the decay from prior greatness he was able to direct us past dangerous areas where roving gangs of violent youths battle each other for turf and prey upon unwary intruders.
Retiring Mayor Dave Bing (D) declared himself pleased with the Citys ability to transition to a new way of life. From the media coverage youd think that the City is just a big wasteland. But even wastelands have a part to play in the evolution of a culture.
Bing modestly refused to take all the credit, Ive done as much as I could in the last five years, but the momentum was established by policies set in place a long time ago. My role was more like a basketball player dribbling out the clock to preserve the teams win.
In related news, Wisconsin is spending millions of dollars to maintain vacant public school buildings rather than rent or sell the space to charter schools. Milwaukee Public Schools spokesman Anthony Tagliavia explains that letting charter schools use these buildings and grounds would remove the one remaining competitive advantage public schools have over these rivals. Forcing charter schools to rent vacant commercial space denies them the opportunity to offer suitable playgrounds the children might use for recess or PE.
if you missed any of this week's other semi-news/semi-satire posts you can find them at...
Ah ... when all else fails ... just make it a tourist attraction. Heck ... I would go, just to see what a city looks like after it has thoroughly collapsed. Some of those abandoned buildings do have quite a photographic appeal ... :-) ...
Will the last one leaving Detroit please shoot out the streetlights?
Nicely crafted though.
That an American city could succumb to such a fate is terrifying.
This is a testament to how far we have fallen.. and yet another proof that socialism is a path to despair.
LOL ... and ... I do recognize that picture (and movie) ... :-) ...
Detroit didn’t fall. It was pushed.
Good point :-)
If anybody believes this, I got a bridge in new York for sale.....
I disagree. Detroit is a testament to how high the democratic party has risen. Wahoo Dems. You’re killing the nation city by city.
Nice one, John. I like the Howard Carter reference.
Youre killing the nation city by city.
They’re like locusts. Move in, consume, move on.
It would be hilarious if they had actor gangbangers hijack the bus and rob the driver, just to add a touch of authenticity.
build a big wall around it
I believe it used to be called The 2nd Paris so the buildings which are decaying are still interesting to see.
and yes I know it is a satire but still.....sniff, sniff, I grew up there.
I also grew up there, when Detroit was more a full fledged, vital city. My alma mater, Cass Tech High School was torn down a few years back. There were eight floors to that high school, and elevators. The juniors in high school used to trick the gullible freshmen into buy ‘elevator passes’. There were no real passes.
I’ve heard MichiganCentralStationHenge is a big draw.
Saddest thing of all is looking through that.
Raze the place and turn it into a corn field.
Sign should be posted: years of liberal democratic rule have led to this
I always thought it would be funny if Romney took over the city. It would be an interesting experiment having a compentent man running the place. Then we could compare the results to obama’s time in office.
The media scorned him when he said the city will go bankrupt.
We paid a guy $50 bucks for a three-hour tour,
In related news, Wisconsin is spending millions of dollars to maintain vacant public school buildings rather than rent or sell the space to charter schools.
Instead of paying people for tours or throwing money at vacant buildings, I may send them my address and let them send money my way. Typical leftover of a city run by dims.
I recently watched "Detropia", a kind of documentary about the current state of decay of Detroit. It was highly rated, but kind of poorly edited, nonetheless, IMHO. One of the reasons I watched it was because it was like a travelogue of the ruins of Detroit. I could see what the destruction that socialism always causes, without having to risk getting shot.
My point is that, as usual, your posts are a brilliant refracting lens of reality. Amazing.
Thank you for the ping. It would be really funny if the reality wasn’t so sad.
LOL! Very funny, John! GREAT WORK (and a great idea hello enterprising Detroiters)!
I grew up on the south Detroit border, Lincoln Park, lived in Detroit’s south side east side north side, and graduated from a Detroit university - Wayne State.
Coming back from a high school hockey game in Detroit last week, my daughter asked me if Detroit would ever come back to what it was when I was growing up. My answer: No, not in my lifetime or hers. She disagreed. Without having the same time-frame of reference (the new normal?) she sees (and so do I) some of the good things happening in Detroit. Viewing from the longer arc of time Detroit has such a long way to go to get back to where it was. Ain’t happenin’.
We are not that far removed from the greatest criminal in Detroit and Michigan history, Kwame Kilpatrick. A whole host of his enablers, sycophants, supporters are still around, many in positions of “power”(totalitarians/socialists/fascists).
Sure it does. Then call it that. The point is that the site describes itself as "Semi-News/Semi-Satire," thus implying that it is a mixture of both. One then must separate the two to appreciate the craft, which is obviously there. In a case like Detroit, sadly, there is no bright line as far as the eye can see, no matter Bing-bling there may be. I'm offering a constructive comment, in no way meant to disparage the effort.
I’ve always said they could have filmed “I am legend” in Detroit. They even have trees growing up through pavement in some places.
Good satire, John!
If I recall, Detroit was called “Paris of the West.” The “Paris of the South” was Beirut, Lebanon.
There were guided tours to devastated areas of New Orleans following Katrina.
You’ve outdone yourself John. This is excellent!
Indeed I wonder how many get it?.
Love the photo, its a modern day version of “grapes of wrath”.
Thanks for the head shakin’, wincing chuckle John. THAT’s a good one.
If one of the 'violent youths' descends upon the tourists, 911 is only an hour away...
If republicans were smart they could put “If you like your ruins, you can keep your ruins, vote democrat” signs all over Detroit.
It all came true.