Posted on 1/29/2006, 2:21:53 PM by Pharmboy
Jay Leno
The government is still analyzing Osama bin Laden's latest tape. On his most recent release, he called Bush a liar and said that he was just after oil. It's the usual stuff we have heard before. Like at the Golden Globes.
Some sad news — NBC has canceled "The West Wing."... That's when you know things are bad — when even fictional Democrats aren't doing well. Can't even get elected on TV anymore.
Today, President Bush visited the supersecret National Security Agency headquarters. Awkward moment: Bush asked to see the cone of silence.
David Letterman
The WB network and the UPN network are merging. They are forming a network called CW. President Bush was warned about this in advance and did nothing about it.
At a press conference yesterday President Bush was asked if he had seen "Brokeback Mountain." He said he hadn't seen the movie but is interested in drilling for oil there.
Speaking of President Bush, he's talking to the National Security Agency to kind of boost morale. These are the people who do all the wiretapping for us. He's talking to them, trying to boost their morale. You also can talk to the National Security Agency just by dialing any phone number in the country.
Jon Stewart
Let's also begin tonight with a question.
Have you driven a Ford lately?
Well, if you're like most Americans you can't answer that question because you're too busy attaching neon lights to the bottom of your Kia.
Nevertheless, the Ford Motor Company, an organization with a rich heritage extending back to the days of Henry Ford, has fallen on hard times, having lost $1.6 billion domestically in the last year alone — in short losing money by the truckload.
Sadly the trucks carrying away the money are Chevys.
(Excerpt) Read more at nytimes.com ...
As usual, Leno is the funniest, Letterman is vaguely amusing and Stewart is just boring.
Yep--agreed, although I thought the Letterman line about the NSA was pretty funny.
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