FReepmail me to get on or off
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Humor break..
Posted on 12/05/2007 1:23:10 PM PST by Graybeard58
CAMBRIDGE, MA - A new study has linked the traditional feasts associated with Thanksgiving and Christmas to increases in planetary temperatures. The report, to be released Wednesday, claims the additional energy required to fatten, slaughter, ship and roast tens of millions of turkeys causes a seasonal spike in greenhouse gasses. Scientists say the effects of these spikes could be devastating. Decadent Turkey Feast "Once the damage is done, it's difficult to reverse the effects." said Myron Finnister, professor of Climatic Endocrinology at Howyflyl University. "It's much like the person doing the feasting, who can never seem to shed those extra pounds. And pretty soon, it's time to feast all over again."
The report cites that energy consumption typically increases during the months of November and December, the peak of the turkey production season. Energy use beyond December is mainly due to cold weather, according to the report. "Temperature increases of up to 0.2 degrees over the next 100 years can be directly attributable to this spike." said Finnister.
Nutritionists and conservationists are quick to point out alternatives to the roast turkey dinner. "Vegetables, which are much lighter than turkeys and therefore more efficient to ship, are an excellent feast." said Lindy Hellman-Jones, a dietary specialist at Newhall Clinic. "But if people must eat turkeys, which is pretty gross, there are steps they can take to save the planet. If everyone would turn their ovens down from 350 to 345, it would be like taking 1 million cars off the road."
and don’t forget to take beano! all the farting people do after eating all that food increases greenhouse gasses too!
Honestly, the fact that anyone even thought to do this study reveals their mindset.
More and more “scientific studies” are done the same way that the MSM does stories, “Here’s the conclusion, go and find some supporting evidence.”
Love it, love it, love it! Thanks for finding this and giving us all a laugh!
Having shoveled 18 inches of brand new global warming out of my driveway since Saturday night, I say bring it on.
Telling these goof-balls to kiss my a$$ probably causes global warming, too. Good. So . . . goof-balls . . . kiss my a$$.
Did you see this one? It’s great satire!
Click on POGW graphic for full GW rundown
New!!: Dr. John Ray's
GREENIE WATCH
Ping me if you find one I've missed.
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