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Little Known Facts about Sarah Palin
Sarah Palin Facts ^
| Aug. 31, 2008
Posted on 08/31/2008 5:41:01 PM PDT by Alouette
Sarah Palin used to wrestle kodiak bears in Alaskan bare knuckles fight clubs.
Sarah Palin once bagged a caribou by staring it down until it died.
Sarah Palin turned down a job as skipper of a Deadliest Catch boat because it wasn't challenging enough
Sarah Palin fishes salmon by convincing them it's in their interest to jump into the boat.
Sarah Palin once guided Santa's sleigh through an Alaskan blizzard with the light from her smile.
Chuck Norris wishes he was Sarah Palin trapped in a man's body.
Sarah Palin paid her way through school by hunting for yeti pelts with a slingshot.
Sarah Palin knows the location of DB Cooper's body because she threw him from the plane.
The Northern Lights are really just the reflection from Sarah Palin's eys.
The raw energy of Sarah Palin melts the Alaskan ice roads every spring.
We don't know who would win in a Chuck Norris - Sarah Palin cage match because they've never inventea cage that can hold Sarah Palin.
Alaska is the 49th state solely because they knew even before she was born that Sarah Palin would never finish last.
Global Warming doesn't kill polar bears. Sarah Palin does - usually with her bare hands.
Three of Sarah Palin's five kids came out sideways - she never flinched.
Sarah Palin's hotness is the largest single contributor to melting polar ice caps.
It's not raining in DC. Those are God's tears of joy that McCain picked Sarah Palin.
We don't know who would win in a Chuck Norris - Sarah Palin cage match bcause they've never invented a cage that can hold Sarah Palin
TOPICS: Humor; Society
KEYWORDS: palin; politics; sarah; sarahcuda
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To: Alouette
Three of Sarah Palin's five kids came out sideways - she never flinched. OK, I'm suspicious. That one is stolen from Planes, Trains, and Automobiles.
The others I can believe.
21
posted on
08/31/2008 5:57:45 PM PDT
by
Mediocrates
(The Audacity of Hype)
To: Alouette
“Three of Sarah Palin’s five kids came out sideways - she never flinched.”
Ha! Planes, Trains, and Automobiles.
22
posted on
08/31/2008 5:57:49 PM PDT
by
ryan71
(McCain/Palin 08)
To: political1
Sarah Palin is so HOT.... Maxim Magazine offered to Rename the Magazine to “Palin Magazine”
23
posted on
08/31/2008 5:59:08 PM PDT
by
Swingj
(Link to Islip in Newsday)
To: Alouette
Sarah Palin once glared at Bill Brassky - and he ran away like a little girl.
To: Alouette
Sarah Palin once fought fire with fire and fire was admitted to the hospital with third degree burns.
25
posted on
08/31/2008 6:04:53 PM PDT
by
NavVet
( If you don't defend Conservatism in the Primaries, you won't have it to defend in November)
To: Alouette
Sarah Palin once fought fire with fire and fire was admitted to the hospital with third degree burns.
26
posted on
08/31/2008 6:05:01 PM PDT
by
NavVet
( If you don't defend Conservatism in the Primaries, you won't have it to defend in November)
To: Alouette
A moose once bit Sarah Palin’s sister. It was the last thing he ever did.
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris. When the Chuck Norris goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Sarah Palin.
Sarah Palin drank Daniel Plainview's milkshake.
Sarah Palin doesn't go hunting. Hunting implies the possibility of failure. Sarah Palin goes killing.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Sarah Palin has allowed to live.
27
posted on
08/31/2008 6:05:54 PM PDT
by
lesser_satan
(Satire today, headlines tomorrow...)
To: Alouette
To: Always Right
Senator Biden wears Sarah Palin underwear. I thought someone would find that funny.
29
posted on
08/31/2008 6:15:42 PM PDT
by
Always Right
(Obama: more arrogant than Bill Clinton, more naive than Jimmy Carter, and more liberal than LBJ.)
To: Alouette
If Moses had failed, God would have caused Sarah Palin be born 3500 years ago.
Liberace was gay, but only because he never met Sara Palin!
Abraham’s wife’s last name was Heath (Sarah Palin’s maiden name).
30
posted on
08/31/2008 6:19:20 PM PDT
by
Blood of Tyrants
(G-d is not a Republican. But Satan is definitely a Democrat.)
To: Always Right
senator Biden would like to wear Sarah Palin's underwear!
31
posted on
08/31/2008 6:24:09 PM PDT
by
CaptRon
(Pedicaris alive or Raisuli dead)
To: Alouette
Take any, or all, of Davey Crockett’s “Tall Tales” and attribute them to Sarah Palin. For Sarah; they are not merely “Tall Tales.”
32
posted on
08/31/2008 6:26:05 PM PDT
by
Grizzled Bear
("Does not play well with others.")
To: Alouette
33
posted on
08/31/2008 6:28:51 PM PDT
by
Krankor
(Are you claiming you eat toucans or)
To: Alouette
Sarah Palin... a real "man" of genius ;-)
34
posted on
08/31/2008 6:53:26 PM PDT
by
Trajan88
(www.bullittclub.com)
To: Alouette
McCain picked Palin because he wants to see an entire team of Secret Service walk a pack of 10 Alaskan Malamutes past congress every day and have them snarl at the RATS.
To: Ancient Drive
thats just toooo damn funny...
36
posted on
08/31/2008 7:00:07 PM PDT
by
Chode
(American Hedonist - McCain/Palin'08 = http://www.johnmccain.com/)
To: Alouette
Sarah Palin is not only a Creationist, but she personally went to Westminister Abbey and stole the bones of Charlie Darwin, replacing them with the bones of William Jennings Bryan just to tick them off
After this feat, she took Darwin’s bones and hurled them at wolves in Alaska while circling in a helicopter overhead
37
posted on
08/31/2008 7:13:09 PM PDT
by
Blogger
To: Alouette
My new favorite:
Sarah Palin’s finishing move in the VP debate will be pulling Biden’s still beating heart from his chest & taking a bite.
38
posted on
08/31/2008 7:18:39 PM PDT
by
NonValueAdded
("John McCain has a birthday but he gives US the present.")
To: Krankor
39
posted on
08/31/2008 7:20:00 PM PDT
by
NonValueAdded
("John McCain has a birthday but he gives US the present.")
To: lesser_satan
Can I borrow this for a tag?
Sarah Palin doesn’t go hunting. Hunting implies the possibility of failure. Sarah Palin goes killing.
40
posted on
08/31/2008 7:22:16 PM PDT
by
GOPJ
(Sarah Palin doesn't go hunting. Hunting implies the possibility of failure. Sarah Palin goes killing)
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