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Mood moosic to get cows going (UK Organic milk group wants farmers to moo @ cows to boost output)
The Sun (U.K.) ^ | September 20, 2008 | John Coles

Posted on 09/21/2008 12:23:01 AM PDT by Stoat

Mood moosic to get cows going

 
Calm ... Graham Vallis

Calm ... Graham Vallis

SOUTH WEST NEWS SERVICE

 
 

FARMERS are being encouraged to MOO at their cows — to boost milk production.

It came after a dairy farmer reported getting six times more milk by mimicking his herd’s sound.

Graham Vallis, 48, does meditation-style mooing for five minutes before milking — and said his cows fall into a relaxed state.

Now the Federation of Organic Milk Groups is urging its 450 members to do the same.

Graham, of Bradninch, Devon, said: “I often take my tea break with my cows, but on one occasion suddenly I became deeply relaxed.

“I realised it was the mooing. I started mooing in time and they crowded round like the Pied Piper.

“Cows are very conscious of their surroundings — if you’re calm, they will be too. This will help them produce more.”

FOMG boss Roger Kerr said it would boost cows’ wellbeing.

A five-minute mooing soundtrack can be heard at www.love-om.com.

j.coles@the-sun.co.uk



TOPICS: Agriculture; Business/Economy; Conspiracy; Health/Medicine
KEYWORDS: animalrights; cows; dairy; farming; foodsupply; freepun; meditation; mooing; organic; organicdairyfarming; socialism
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Not enough?

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Daily Star Simply The Best 7 Days A Week News Stressed Try mooing...

 

STRESSED? TRY MOOING..

.

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19th September 2008
By Charlotte Hodges for dailystar.co.uk



MAKING animal noises in the office could be seen as the first sign of a nervous breakdown.


But farmers in Exeter instead believe that mooing like a cow could be the key to inner peace.

Graham Vallis took a quiet tea break among his cows and he now believes he has unwittingly helped create a whole new relaxation technique.

After a few minutes the stressed out farmer found himself naturally meditating to the sound of his contented cows gently mooing in the background.

Farmer Graham said: "I often take my tea break with my cows, but on this particular occasion I was sitting there, when all of a sudden I became deeply relaxed. I realized that this had to do with the sound of the mooing."

Devon-based meditation teacher Martin Boroson explains: "Most people associate cows with tranquility, so imagining a happy cow definitely puts people into a more meditative state."

The farmers believe people worldwide could benefit from the animal's sounds and have created a tranquil soundtrack of moos with The Federation of Organic Milk Group.

So if like the farmers in Exeter, you're feeling the strain, just follow these five simple steps to the perfect 'mooment':


Step 1

Sit with your back straight but relaxed.


Step 2

Close your eyes, or simply lower your gaze and focus on the ground a few feet in front of you.


Step 3

If you notice any bits of tension in your body, try to relax them.


Step 4

Bring your attention to your breathing. Breathe deeply and slowly.


Step 5

Now chant or say the word 'moo'.


After about five minutes you should feel relaxed and refreshed - as long as you ignore the strange looks from everyone in the office!

1 posted on 09/21/2008 12:23:02 AM PDT by Stoat
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To: Slings and Arrows
cowface
2 posted on 09/21/2008 12:23:31 AM PDT by Stoat (Palin / Coulter 2012: A Strong America Through Unapologetic Conservatism)
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To: Stoat

Sounds like an udder waste of time.


3 posted on 09/21/2008 12:25:02 AM PDT by TheWasteLand
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To: Daffynition
cowinboat
4 posted on 09/21/2008 12:29:05 AM PDT by Stoat (Palin / Coulter 2012: A Strong America Through Unapologetic Conservatism)
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To: TheWasteLand
But it might get you in the moo-d.
5 posted on 09/21/2008 12:33:30 AM PDT by pieceofthepuzzle
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To: Stoat
Bull S*** !!

Unless he was forgetting to milk the cows most days, there is no way any decently tended and milked cow of modern breed (and those in his picture don't look like mutant shrubs) could have its milk production increased six fold.

6 posted on 09/21/2008 12:34:42 AM PDT by ThePythonicCow (By their false faith in Man as God, the left would destroy us. They call this faith change.)
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To: TheWasteLand

I’ve known lots of dairy farmers who say the same..


7 posted on 09/21/2008 12:37:27 AM PDT by aeonspromise
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To: ThePythonicCow
Bull S*** !!

Unless he was forgetting to milk the cows most days, there is no way any decently tended and milked cow of modern breed (and those in his picture don't look like mutant shrubs) could have its milk production increased six fold.

From the Sun article:

“I often take my tea break with my cows,...."

For a man with this sort of social life, I would wish to suggest that his ability to properly measure quantities of milk may be impaired at the outset.

From the Daily Star article:

"...the stressed out farmer ...."

Life for him is obviously hanging by a thread....

8 posted on 09/21/2008 12:43:11 AM PDT by Stoat (Palin / Coulter 2012: A Strong America Through Unapologetic Conservatism)
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To: Stoat

Oh gosh, Stoat...the funniest thing I’ve seen in a long time.

Thanks.


9 posted on 09/21/2008 12:48:47 AM PDT by Cindy
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To: Stoat
Good point. I was presuming that the reporter was incompetent (usually a safe presumption) but in this case the source of the confusion might be straight from the horse's cow herders mouth.
10 posted on 09/21/2008 12:56:14 AM PDT by ThePythonicCow (By their false faith in Man as God, the left would destroy us. They call this faith change.)
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To: Cindy
Oh gosh, Stoat...the funniest thing I’ve seen in a long time.

Thanks.

You're quite welcome, and I'm delighted that you've found it to be worthwhile :-)

Bovine meditation principles are obviously going to be the next Big Thing.

((((snicker))))

 

 cows

11 posted on 09/21/2008 12:56:56 AM PDT by Stoat (Palin / Coulter 2012: A Strong America Through Unapologetic Conservatism)
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To: Salamander

An udderly ridiculous ping.


12 posted on 09/21/2008 1:04:24 AM PDT by shibumi (...vampire outlaw of the milky way...)
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To: Salamander; All

I have been instructed to give proper credit to Mrs shibumi for that udderly ridiculous pun.


13 posted on 09/21/2008 1:06:37 AM PDT by shibumi (...vampire outlaw of the milky way...)
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To: Stoat

Oh you’re so right...Let’s write a bit of that story now...

Cows pass less gas and produce more milk with quality moo meditation time.
This is good for the earth as it reduces global warming.

Read More in Monday’s edition of the news...


14 posted on 09/21/2008 1:08:25 AM PDT by Cindy
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To: Stoat
Is this a new way to deliver fresh moo-oo-oo-ilk or will the rocking boat make butter?

Brit dairy farmers need to get current with their own heritage. This is an early prototype of the Corpus Chronophage. Time is of the essence.


15 posted on 09/21/2008 1:09:21 AM PDT by Daffynition (Follow the dots: Davis, Ayers, Dohrn, Malley, Soros… use a RED crayon.)
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To: ThePythonicCow; All
Good point. I was presuming that the reporter was incompetent (usually a safe presumption) but in this case the source of the confusion might be straight from the horse's cow herders mouth.

It may indeed, or it may be a combination of the two.  One would think that a competent reporter would ask for verification of the output figures, preferably in the form of a stylish graph or a colorful pie chart that would add column-inches to an otherwise minimal story.  Perhaps the reporter felt sorry for the farmer's pathetic social life and didn't want to give him a hard time?

Noting that farmers are also being encouraged to take up Tai Chi, perhaps Farmer Vallis was exuding so much inner peace and contentment that the reporter was entirely flummoxed and decided that "it was an amount of milk which appeared to be in harmony with the Cow".

Love-OM News Chi-ing the cud Organic dairy farmers take up Tai Chi

Chi-ing the cud? Organic dairy farmers take up Tai Chi

Committed to ensuring the maximum levels of wellbeing in every pint of milk - for us, for the environment and for the  cows - Britain's organic dairy farmers have taken up the ancient practice of Tai Chi. Following the launch of the Love-OM campaign to encourage shoppers to choose organic milk, welly-clad dairymen and women, tanker drivers and herdsmen from across the nation have been striking Tai Chi poses in order to bring an additional spiritual uplift to their cows, fields and farmyards.

Drawing inspiration from China, where farmers have practiced Tai Chi since the seventeenth century, the Federation of Organic Milk Groups (FOMG) has enlisted the services of a Tai Chi Master or 'Sifu' to help them learn the special moves, renowned for bestowing a mood of wellbeing. Over the past few weeks, the official Love-OM Tai Chi Sifu has been travelling the country spreading peace and harmony to the organic dairy farms of Britain.

Tristan Dale, Love-OM farmer and demonstrator of Friday's move 'surveying the farm', says: "Being an organic dairy farmer is hard work. I want to make sure I am as relaxed and focused as possible. My mood definitely transfers to my cows and as organic farmers we believe happier cows produce better milk. Organic farming, like Tai Chi, is all about maintaining a balance. In organic farming we do our best to maintain a balance with nature and Tai Chi has helped me maintain the inner balance which is reflected my farm."

FOMG members have adapted a series of seven traditional Tai Chi routines - one for every day of the week. Each of the movements has been assigned a series of easy-to-follow instructions created for the agriculturally minded, with names like 'up with the lark', 'lazily buttoning overalls' and 'arms like tractor wheels'.

Love-OM Tai Chi is not reserved for organic farmers. The moves are simple enough to do anywhere, from tube station to toddler group. To help the rest of us introduce a little bit of wellbeing into our everyday lives, videos of organic dairy farmers demonstrating the Love-OM Tai Chi moves have been uploaded to www.love-om.com which launched this week.

Roger Kerr, Chairman of the FOMG, adds: "Enjoying organic milk everyday is a great way to enhance your wellbeing. It's kind to the environment, kind to your body, kind to your wallet and comes from happy and contented cows. That's what Love-OM and Tai Chi are all about so we hope that everyone will embrace the feeling and log-on to the site to try out the moves for themselves."

Learn more about how organic milk can improve your wellbeing at www.love-om.com.


16 posted on 09/21/2008 1:12:38 AM PDT by Stoat (Palin / Coulter 2012: A Strong America Through Unapologetic Conservatism)
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To: Stoat
Could this be an undocumented case of mad cow amongst the UK farmers?


17 posted on 09/21/2008 1:27:39 AM PDT by Daffynition (Follow the dots: Davis, Ayers, Dohrn, Malley, Soros… use a RED crayon.)
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To: Stoat; MeekOneGOP; Conspiracy Guy; DocRock; King Prout; Darksheare; OSHA; martin_fierro; ...
Could be worse. Could be "MOO...BANG...MOOO!"


18 posted on 09/21/2008 1:45:07 AM PDT by Slings and Arrows (~ ~ FREE LAZAMATAZ! ~ ~ [Shipping and handling charges may apply.])
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To: Slings and Arrows
Or not. ;-D


19 posted on 09/21/2008 1:53:01 AM PDT by Daffynition (Follow the dots: Davis, Ayers, Dohrn, Malley, Soros… use a RED crayon.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

Perhaps they should teach the cows ballet?


20 posted on 09/21/2008 1:57:07 AM PDT by Arthur Wildfire! March (DRILL HERE! DRILL NOW! NO STRINGS! You guys are great! FReep on!)
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